PROLOGUE: One day, a man was casually walking down he busy New York street, he looked up in the sky, and saw his help sign! It was in the shape of a...piece of spinach. "My help is needed!" he yelled REALLY loudly and pointed towards his Super Spinach Symbol. Passersby saw him, and they realized with the ding of a lightbulb, that he was Super Spinach Man! They all started screaming with excitement, and stampeded towards him. His eyes got really wide, then filled up with terror. Closer, closer they came; a huge mass of bodies, swarming towards him! "AAAAAAAAAA!" he screamed. "I'm claustrophobic!" And at that, he stuck his finger up his nose, kicked his right leg, and started patting his tummy. He flew up into the air, and went right over the Eiffel Tower...wait a second...sorry, wrong place/attraction...and went right over the Empire State Building! HIs adoring crowd watched him leave, then disappointedly walked away as he disappeared on the horizon.
PART 1: Mikey Slivers stared in amazement at the petrified tree in front of him. He was at Disneyland, and that was the best thing he had seen all day. (Just in case you're wondering, there is a petrified tree at Disneyland. It's on the shore of Tom Sawyer's lagoon thing.) His mouth was hanging open, drool dripping off his chin. "Wow," he breathed to no one in particular.
"Yes, it is beautiful, isn't it?" said a voice from behind him.
He whirled around only to find a beautiful blond chick that looked exactly like the girl in Matrix, red dress and all. He stood there dumbfounded, mouth open, drool dripping off his chin.
She was a thin, slender girl, with thin legs, and thick blond hair. Her deep blue eyes stared adoringly at him. He felt like he could just stand there forever. He snapped out of his stupor and realized how dumb he looked right then, because she was waving her hand across his eyes.
"Hellooo? Are you okay?" she asked, with a dreamy voice.
"Yeah, fine. Just fine. My name's Mikey," he said as he wiped the drool of his chin, and closed his mouth. "My name's Shannon." she replied.
"Have you gone on the Haunted Mansion yet?" he asked. "No, it's too scary to go alone," she replied. "Well, then, I guess I'll just have to go with you." he replied heroically.
"Oh, my hero!" she squealed, and she grabbed his hand and they went off towards the ride.
PART 2: They got on and were in the little black car thing, when the ride suddenly jerked to a stop. "How peculiar," said Mikey.
"How peculiar," droned a voice that came from above, that sent chills through Mikey's spine. "How peculiar, you say, and yet, you are in a haunted house. Why would that be peculiar?" at that, the voice let out a deep, long cackle. "Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha...I've got you, my pretty! And your little blond chica too! Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha..."
"I dont think we're in the regular Haunted House anymore, Mikey," cried Shannon.
"Oh, be quiet! THis isn't the Wizard of Oz, and that guy is just a joke...we're miked or something; nothing to worry about," he soothed as he patted her arm. Suddenly, Shannon threw herself around him and screamed.
PART 3: There, floating in front of them, was a great big piece of bacon! "Chill out you big baby! It's just bacon!" he told her exasperatingly. "I'm a vegetarian!" she wailed, tears forming in her eyes.
"Oh, brother! Come on, let's get out of this thing. I'm claustrophobic," he said, as he started climbing out of the car.
"Claustrophobic, and yet you're in a Haunted House; hmmm...that makes a lot of sense for someone who is scared of small dark places," said the creepy voice again.
"Would you shut up!" yelled Mikey at whoever was saying that. "I'm really sick of you!" "Oh, sorry," the voice broke and started crying. "I'm just a coward, I admit. I sit here and act like ruler of the universe, trying to scare people and all, when I'm really just a small man that wants to earn a little money. Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hooo!" "Thank you! Now will you kindly tell us where the nearest exit is?" Mikey demanded. "Directly to your left," the voice replied. "Thank you for shining a light on my path; for changing my view of the meaning of life; for giving me such great words of wisdom; for..." and the rest was lost, because Mikey and Shannon had already left.
PART 4: They found themselves in a small secret garden that only a few of the employees there knew about. Shannon turned and looked deep into Mikey's eyes, and he returned the gaze. Her face moved closer, lips puckered up, and they were a centimeter away from contact, when, out of the corner of his eye, Mikey saw the Super Spinach Sign! He tore himself away, did his little Super Spinach Man ritual, and flew away. "I'll come back in less than an hour! I promise! If not, I'm dead!" he yelled over his shoulder to the shocked and dejected Shannon. SHe nodded her head, then promptly sat down to wait.
PART 5: Up and away he flew to his headquarters, where he sat down at his debriefing chair. He grabbed a soda and some chips, then watched the screen. His little robot instructor, dubbed the Super Spinach Robot, told him what he had to do.
"You must go to the is-land of Char-a-bur-ra," the robot said in an electronic, monotonous voice, "and save the gold-en co-co-nut. The ev-il Cap-tain Drob-bo-nos-ger has tak-en it to his la-ir. You must re-cov-er it im-me-di-ate-ly. That is all." "Fun," said Mikey dully. But, he knew his duty as the Super Spinach Man, got up, and flew off towards his destination.
PART 6: Upon arrival, he found that the evil Captain Drobbonosger was waiting for him. With one blast of his Super Spinach Gunk, Captain Drobbonosger was laying face-first in the sand, trying to cough up the grains.
"Hand over the golden coconut, Drobbonosger!" Super Spinach Man cried. "Never! For I have eaten it so that you may never find it!" shouted the vile form still laying pathetically in the sand.
Spinach Man looked at the Captain's stomach with his Super Spinach X-ray Vision, and, sure enough, there was a lump of gold sitting there. "Well, we can fix that easily enough!" he pulled out a canister of a mixture that made Captain Drobbonosger cry out in fear.
"Not the Super Spinach Laxative!" he yelled in agony. "Yes, the Super Spinach Laxative!" replied Mikey, and he promptly grabbed the groveling wimp in front of him, forced open his mouth, and dumped all the contents of the can in. AFter about 15 seconds, the Captain winced, then looked like he was about to throw up. He ran for the nearest bush, then came back 20 minutes later with a sigh of relief, for the Laxative had really done him in. Super Spinach Man put on some Super Spinach Sanitary Gloves and went and picked up the golden coconut. He washed it in the ocean, then turned to the relieved personage behind him. "Your evil ways are over, Drobbonosger! Give it up! Become a new man! But for now, I must depart," and he left the gaping man on the island by himself.
PART 7: He flew back to headquarters and dropped off the golden coconut with a thank-you from his robot. Then he went to Disneyland. He flew back into the secret garden, and Shannon flung her arms around him. "I was afraid you would never come back!" she moaned. "It's okay," he soothed,"I'm here now." At that, he wrapped his arms around her and gave her a great, big smooch. After wiping the bright red lipstick off his mouth, he knelt down in front of her, and said,"Shannon, I know we've only just met, but since the people in Titanic did, well, will you marry me?" She gasped, then slapped him! "You are such an idiot! I would never marry a guy that based his life on what he saw in fictional movies! I don't EVER want to see you again!" she turned on her heel and walked stiffly to the nearest EXIT. Mikey sat there dumbfounded for a minute, then exasperated, slapped himself on the forehead. "Oh man! I did it again! I forgot to not use that pick-up line! Chicks NEVER go for that!" So, remorseful and abandoned, he flew back to headquarters to watch T.V.
THE END
THere ya go, miss kesh...hope ya like it!
~Chelsea Mac
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