+------------------ Reasons To Celebrate ------------------+
June is... Cancer In The Sun Month
June is... Adopt-A-Shelter-Cat Month
June is... Turkey Lover's Month
June is... National Accordion Awareness Month
June is... National Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Month
June is... Fight The Filthy Fly Month
June is... National Rose Month
June 1 is... Dare Day
June 2 is... National Rocky Road Day
June 3 is... Repeat Day
June 4 is... Old Maid's Day
June 5 is... Festival Of Popular Delusions Day
June 7 is... National Chocolate Ice Cream Day
June 8 is... Name Your Poison Day
June 10 is... National Yo-Yo Day
June 12 is... Machine Day
June 13 is... Kitchen Klutzes of America Day
June 15 is... Smile Power Day
June 16 is... National Hollerin' Contest Day
June 17 is... Watergate Day and Eat Your Vegetables Day
June 18 is... International Panic Day
June 19 is... World Sauntering Day
June 20 is... Ice Cream Soda Day
June 21 is... Cuckoo Warning Day
June 22 is... National Chocolate Eclair Day
June 26 is... National Chocolate Pudding Day
June 27 is... National Columnists Day
June 28 is... Paul Bunyan Day
June 30 is... Meteor Day

+--------------- Bizarre Festivals, Part 2 ---------------+

DOO DAH PARADE (U.S., Thanksgiving). A spoof version of the glittering Rose Parade held each year in Pasadena, CA, the Doo Dah Parade has deliberately become a byword in tackiness with badly-decorated floats, inept drill teams and a routine where businessmen in suits perform with their briefcases.

KING OF THE MOUNTAIN FESTIVAL (Norway, July). With a summit just 140ft above the surrounding plains, Mount Wycheproof in Victoria is registered as the lowest mountain in the world. This fact is celebrated annually with a foot-race up the mountain with each contestant carrying a sack of wheat weighing 140 lb.

LA TOMATINA (Spain). This festival dates back to 1944 when the fair at Bunol was ruined by hooligans hurling tomatoes at the procession. Now each year the town stages a 90-minute mass fight with 190,000 lbs of ripe tomatoes, an event which has relegated the annual fair to the status of a mere sideshow.

MOOSE DROPPING FESTIVAL (Alaska, July). The town of Talkeetna plays host to an annual celebration of moose- droppings. Stalls sell jewelry and assorted knick knacks made from moose-droppings but pride goes to the moose- dropping-throwing competition where competitors toss gold- painted moose-droppings into a target, the winner being the one who lands his dropping closest to the center target.

SWINGING THE FIREBALLS (Scotland, New Year's Eve). Residents of the Stonehaven march through the town swinging great balls of fire made from wire netting and filled with driftwood, pine cones, twigs and oil-soaked rags. The balls are then thrown into the harbor to herald the New Year. The ceremony is thought to date back to the Middle Ages when the townsfolk tried to charm the sun from the heavens during the long, cold winter months.

----------------- Preacher Packs A Whollup -----------------

ADELAIDE, Australia - Preacher, Sterling Tillotson needed to get his watch repaired at the local jeweler and came back a hero. Yes, this 67-year-old preacher walked in on a robbery and luckily was toting his Bible. He walked up to the would-be robber and knocked him out cold with the Good Book. After the ordeal, the kindly minister convinced the jeweler not to press charges.

------------------ PETA Peeved by Parody -------------------

NORFOLK, Va. - It was truly a case of a "man eat dog" world when an animal rights group took a man to court for misusing their domain name. PETA, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, were not amused when Michael Doughney developed a parody site entitled People Eating Tasty Animals. The parody site described itself as "a resource for those who enjoy eating meat, wearing fur and leather, hunting and the fruits of scientific research." PETA accused Doughney of trademark infringement and cyber-squatting. Doughney declined to comment, except to say that the case is "not about someone who is against animal rights or against PETA and he has never registered a domain name with the intention of selling it."

---------------- PETA Tackles The Packers -----------------

GREEN BAY, Wis. - The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals said in a letter to Green Bay Packers team president Bob Harlan that the name promotes violence and bloodshed because it refers to meat packers, or those who work in slaughterhouses. PETA vegetarian campaign coordinator Bruce Friedrich suggests making the team the Green Bay "Pickers," referring to picking fruits and vegetables, or possibly the Green Bay "Six-Packers," referring to the state's brewing history. Despite the intense pressure PETA can bring against The Packers, especially in Wisconsin, Harlan says no way, claiming, "We like our name, our tradition." [Shouldn't these guys be out releasing monkeys from cosmetics labs or something?]

--------- Prostitutes Can Dress Down For Their Job ---------

MADRID - If you're involved in the world's oldest profession, I think it's time to move to Madrid! Yep, they protect the rights of all prostitutes to wear little clothing, because it is their "work uniform". The police chief was trying to get a proposal passed that would charge prostitutes with the offense of indecent exposure. It was voted down because... "prostitutes should not be ordered to cover up because they are simply wearing the uniform of their profession."

-------------- Fired Pizza Maker Demands Dough --------------

BLACKWOOD, England - Fired pizza maker Carole Simpson was in no mood to wait for her severance check after working only one day. So she took matters into her own hands by kidnapping her supervisor at gunpoint until he called someone to bring her day's pay. Because Carole is a 16-year-old minor, she was sentenced to 12 months in a juvenile detention center. [Somebody needs to screen their workers better.]

--------------- Young Boy Gets a Sharp "Cue" ---------------

GRIMSBY, England - Men all over the world will be crossing their legs in sympathy after reading this little horror story. An 11-year-old boy had to undergo reconstructive surgery this month after a freak accident with a snooker cue. The boy was standing on a chair, holding the stick with the tip between his legs, as if he was riding a pogo stick, when he slipped and fell. The boy is said to be recuperating satisfactorily from the scrotal and abdominal surgery to fix the rupture.