Awww yeah... Theme Music babay
Two characters that aren't mentioned on the other page are my boyfriend Luke, and my friend Kia. Now, I got a couple of, "Why in the hell is your boyfriend here?" questions, and I'd like to answer them. I love my boyfriend, and I decided not to ever mention him here cuz I didn't want to make fun of him or anything (come on now, we all now that I make fun of everyone that I put up here), and well.. I never needed to (mention him). But he recently read some of the stuff up here, and he was like, "D-doll, you look single in all of these stories." So here he is, my boyfriend, first and last appearance people, savor it. LoL.
Ok, I used a bit of profanity in here. Not much, but you should be warned before you go on.
Ok, so Luke, Kia, and I are hanging out at Starbuck's... bored out of our minds, when one of the guys who works there brings over a rather large cup of coffee that none of us ordered.
Guy: This is for the three of you *glances around*
Alex: Uhh... ok. Who's it from?
Guy: I can't say *looks behind him*
Luke: Are you sure you work here? *Kia and I snicker* What? The guy's dressed in black and he looks paranoid!
Kia: Good point
Alex: Uhh... only the paranoid survive, right?
Guy: Very good... the paranoia is strong within you, Pookie. Now look into the mug... I mean... drink the coffee... *scampers off like a squirrel on crack*
We look into the mug and see... *gasp* a face staring back at us!
The Face: BooBoo, Pookie, and Shnookums, I trust you are enjoying yourselves. *silence* Well, are you? *we shrug* Ok then... your mission, if you chose to accept it-
Kia: What the...?
The Face: Don't interrupt!
Kia: Okaay... sorry.
The Face: *clears throat* As I was saying... your mission, if you chose to accept, is to find the closely gaurded secret base where the rebel fighters are... wait, wrong mission. I'm sorry, just one second. *The Face disappears for a minute and we hear ruffled paper sounds* Ok, here it is. You three will meet up with a group of people who will help you complete your mission: to track down Nsync and force them to go on a date with the afore-mentioned group of people
Luke: Awww... why couldn't we have had the first one?
Kia: Who are these people? Where do we find Nsync? How do we make them go on the date?
The Face: That's for me to know and for you to find out.
Kia: But that's practically impossible
The Face: Exactly. This is not Mission: Difficult, Shnookums, this is Mission: Impookible
Alex: Hey... isn't that from... nevermind. Where do we meet this group, then?
The Face: You will meet the group at Claire's. You know the section with all the Nsync merchandise?
The Face: Yes you do. It's the one where they have all that incredibly expensive and useless Nsync crap.
Kia and Alex: OoooOooOOooh!
Luke: I'm still confused
Alex: *rubbing his shoulder* It's ok, sweetie-
The Face: You mean, BooBoo
Alex: *nodding slowly* Right... of course I do...*cough*or not*cough*
The Face: Good. From now on, only refer to each other by your codenames, and to Nsync as Pumpkin. Good Luck on your mission!
Mysterious Robotic Voice: This message will self-destruct in 10 seconds
Kia: You're kidding! The coffee mug's gonna blow up!?
Robotic Voice: That's what I said, wasn't it? I would duck if I were you
Robotic Voice: Dammit! I just said that! Honestly, Pay attention!
So the mug blows up... but we got under the table just in time! *cheesy smile*
At Claire's... Kia and I are trying to talk Luke into going inside.
Kia: It's not just a jewlery store... they have other stuff, too
Luke: Like what?
Alex: Uhh... inflatable items...
Luke: What do you mean, inflatable items?
Alex: What do you mean, what do I mean, inflatable items?
Luke: What do you mean, what do I mean, what do you mean, inflatable items?
Alex: What do you mean, what do I mean, what do you mean, what do I mean, inflatable items?
Luke: *stops and thinks for a minute* Nevermind, I'll just go in
Alex: *to Kia* It works every time
Anyhoo... we all go in and well... look for a rather large group of people, and since Claire's isn't really that big, I mean... they're right there wearing Nsync stuff and... and besides, one of them is arguing with a girl *probly 13 or so* over who gets the last Nsync oversized novelty pencil...
Luke: Could ya be more obvious?
And as we get closer...
Daniel: *holding one end of the pencil* It's mine
Carin (the girl): No! I like, totally grabbed it before you did!
Daniel: Did not!
Carin: Did so!
Daniel: Did not!
Alex: Ok! Let's just... calm down for a second here... uhh *turns to the guy* Are you with the group?
Daniel: *still holding pencil* Yeah... why?
Alex: kay, I'm Pookie.. *gestures to Luke* this is BooBoo, *to Kia* and this is Shnookums. Now let go of the pencil, ok?
Luke: Just do it *Nike! LoL... I dunno.. don't ask*
Daniel: Fine *lets go... very reluctantly, if I might add*
Carin: Yay! *sticks out her tongue at him* Hahaha! Bite me, you big bully, you!
Alex: Well that was cute *receives weird looks* What?
Kia: Nevermind... what are your names?
Dana: Honey Bunches of Oats... I'm Justin's date
Nicole: Muffin Face... Lance's date
Sarah: Bubbie *pronounced "Buh-bee"*... Chris' date
Jenn: Cuddles... JC's date
Daniel: Sugah Daddy... Joey's... uhh... drinking buddy?
Kia: *with fake enthusiasm* Hey, maybe the two of you can go around trying to pick up girls that are waaaay out of your league!
Daniel: *grins* HeeeEEEeeyyy!! That's not a bad idea!
Kia: *staring at Daniel*
Kia: Oh Dear God...
Alex: Right. Anyhoo, we don't know what we're supposed to do, where, when...
Luke: Basically, we know nothing
Kia: Any of you know anything? I mean, besides... Sugah Daddy over there
Carin: *coming back* Oh, I, like, forgot to give you guys this... soooooo soooorrrrrry! Like, bye! *hands me a black box... cube.. box... cube... thing*
Alex: Ok... thanks. *turns to the rest of the group* What the hell is this? *the box.. cube... whatever, you all know what it looks like... anyhoo, the thing opens up and we see ::gasp::... The Face*
The Face: Good, you're all here. And Pookie, this is a box.
Alex: But it's not hollow, now is it?
The Face: Yes it is
Alex: I was describing what kind of box it was, then
The Face: If you say so. *as I'm about to say something* Anyway! I'm glad you're all there and got the box and everything. Now you have to go to the Nsync Compound *and I must say, that is so frikkin gay... the Nsync Compound?!? Please, people. I don't even have to try anymore.* and try to see if you can get in. Then, whatever you do is up to you.. just, don't get caught... cuz then you would have no story, now would you, Pookie?
Alex: But it would make such an interesting plot twist
The Face: This is why you're never supposed to be in your own stories
Alex: Bite me
The Face: I would, except I'm a holographic image. BooBoo, you bite her!
Luke: I'm not gonna bite her... Kia, you bite her
Kia: Nuh-uh... Bubbie, you bite her
Alex: Ok.. no one is going to bite me... please
The Face: Then why'd you say so?
Alex: *shaking head* I'm not even gonna answer that.. let's just go
So we go... to the *chokes back hysterical laughter...* Nsync Compound *...unsuccessfully*
::Please pause while I regain my composure::
Ok, sorry... where was I? Oh yeah... that place...*snickers*
Anyhoo.. it's about 10:00 pm and we're all dressed in black from head to toe. Ski masks and synchronized watches, people. This is Mission: Impoookible... not just your everyday illegal activities
Alex: Ok... BooBoo and Shnookums will come with me, and we'll try to break in through JC's room.. he should be asleep. Honey Bunches of Oats and Cuddles, you two stay here and be on the lookout. Sugah Daddy and Bubbie, you two try to sneak in through the back door or something. Muffin Face, do you have the happy cloud? *aka anesthetic... aka sleeping gas... aka drugs... aka something JC would love... aka..*
Nicole: *holds up a couple of cylinders* Right here
Alex: Alright... you set those off when the alarm on your watch goes off... Everyone remember the codes?
Alex: Good... and remember that you have a few minutes before Muffin Face sets off the happy cloud, so take your time breaking in and all...ok... uhh... let's roll?
Everyone shrugs at me and we all go where we're supposed to...
[At JC's window]
Alex: What? Flyers?... oh.. Pliers *hands Kia the pliers.. Kia hands them to Luke.. you get it, right? riiight*
And after a couple of tries with the crowbar and a hammer... we finally get the window open. Woohooo!
JC: What the hell? Are you the cops? I don't know anyone named Jerome! I swear!
Luke: Man... we're not the cops
JC: You're not? Who are you, then?
Kia: We're uh... we're...
Kia: *sarcastically* Nice save
Alex: Ahh Well... what're ya gonna do?
JC: Call the police
Alex: But you can't call the police
JC: Why not?
Alex: Cuz uh... cuz... we'll expose you
Kia: As a... uhh... as...as... as... a.. guy... who... who
Alex: who.. goes to sleep early! Yeah!
Kia: And... who... has a friend named Jerome.. who... might... uhh... who is Jerome?
Luke: Look! He's eating Vick's! (Vick's Vapor Rub... the greasy gel kind... I dunno, maybe it gave him some sort of high by clearing his nostrils really well or sumthin) *suddenly a cylinder of sleeping gas flies in through the window and Luke, Kia, and I whip out some gas masks for ourselves*
Alex: *yelling out the window* Thanks, Muffin Face!
Luke: Well that took care of JC *prodding the unconscious JC with his foot*
Kia: Right. Let's go see how everyone else is doing
While we were busy making up excuses for being in JC's room and gassing him as he ate Vick's, Daniel (Sugah Daddy) and Sarah (Bubbie) were trying to break in through the back door... the one by the kitchen. (Assuming there is a kitchen door on the *lol* Nsync Compound)
Daniel: you have a hairpin?
Sarah: *whipping out a small black case* Stand back, amateur *Daniel moves away from the door and Sarah takes a few tools out of the case*
Daniel: Hey, that's a lock-picking kit.
Sarah: You're quick *gets the door open*
Daniel: Where'd you learn how to do that, anyway?
Sarah: My friend Amanda... which reminds me, I have to call her when this is over
Joey: Hey! What're you *stuffs donut into mouth* plpl oong n mphy kchn, *swallows* huh?
Daniel: Hey! It's Joey! Waaahhhhzzzuuuup daawg?!?
Joey: Who the hell are you?
Sarah: We're your best friends from NYC... forgotten us already, Joe? Geez... I am so disappointed in you
Daniel: Yeah, man... I thought you'd remember all those chicks we picked up together
Sarah: I don't wanna hear any buts, Joseph
Daniel: She's right... I thought you'd "stay grounded" and all... even when you blew up... in more ways than one... but *sniffing and biting lip* I guess I was wrong *sits on the table and starts sobbing*
Sarah: *pretending to comfort him* Great acting
Joey: *standing in the same spot... not even blinking... just standing*
Sarah: uuhh... Don't you want to invite us in Joey?
Joey: Uhh.. yeah... go... in *and they all go into the living room, just as Luke, Kia, and I are dragging JC down the stairs*
Luke: *whispering* Stop!
Kia and I: *whispering back and dropping JC's lower half with a thud* What!?
Luke: Shhh! Muffin Face hasn't set off the Happy Cloud down here yet
Justin: *eating his hair gel* Who are these people?
Sarah and Daniel: We're friends of Joey's
Lance: Justin, if your ass didn't eat that gawdam hair gel, it'd last longer
Justin: shut up, wannabe
Lance: Wannabe?!? What's your Ghetto Ricky Martin Wannabe Ass talkin bout?!?
Luke: *upstairs* So that's why his hair's so fucked up... he eats the hair gel
Alex and Kia: *exchanging wtf looks* What?!
Chris: *downstairs* Both of you are just going through some sort of identity crisis since you're just out of your teen years. *Lance and Justin look at each other and then at Chris* Justin, you're trying to grow up and be the one with the hair, and at the same time exploring a new, more mature, Latin-lover image. Lance, you are trying to hold on to your youth by acting like- *:: high-pitched beeping:: We're sorry, your local Chris Kirkpatrick is currently experiencing technical difficulties since both Justin and Lance have attacked him due to his apparently-offensive psycho-babble. We will try to get him up and running ASAP. We are sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for your patience and understanding. ::high-pitched beeping followed by a series of crazy sounding beeps and other..uhh..psychotic sounding noises::*
Then the Happy Cloud Cylinder flew in and they were all knocked out. Except Sarah, Daniel, Luke, Kia, and me.. of course... why did I mention that? Ahh well... confirmation I guess. LoL... I'm losing my mind. So Nicole (Muffin Face) comes in to help us tie them up and take them out to our van. That being done, Dana (Honey Bunches of Oats) and Jenn (Cuddles) got in the van and we went somewhere where everyone could change. Then it was on to the date. *I promise I'll keep this short =0)*
At some restaurant...
We had to prop up all the Nsync guys because they were still ... errr... sleeping off the effects of that oh-so-wonderful Happy Cloud. =06 <-- that's what they looked like... with their tongues hanging out and stuff... ok. Leave me alone... it's late...
Waitress: What will you all be having? *looking at the sleeping 5 strangely*
Alex: I'll have the teryaki chicken and an iced tea
Kia: I'll go ahead and have the same
Luke: Me too... except a coke instead of the iced tea
Dana: I think I'll have the calamari and bread... and a coke. My bit-err.. my date here'll have the Fetuccinni Alfredo and a coke, too. Bring a lot of bread, ok?
Waitress: *scribbling furiously (I love that phrase, I dunno why) and nodding* mmmkay
Daniel: I'll have the pizza and a Mr. Pibb... and just give my friend the same... actually, bring him two... and your number *Waitress looks at him oddly, then turns to Nicole*
Nicole: I'll have the...hmm... the trout and a red wine and my date will have the french toast
Jenn: I'll havethe ravioli and a FuFu Berry flavored Jones Soda and my date will have the Mooshoo Pork and Chow Mein with a sprite. *this restaurant, I'd like to go to...lol.. everything from pizza to calamari to Chinese food*
Sarah: I'll have the tacos and a Sprite and my date will have the same
Waitress: Ok.. *walks away muttering* what a bunch of freaks... Maybe I should quit...
So when the food finally gets there...
Dana: *shaking Justin's shoulder* Justin... wake up. Hey, J-Dawgg... yo, yo, yo, Ricky M!
Justin: *stirs* mmph... is this gel? *head plops down into pasta*
Daniel: *Pointing towards Joey's pizza* Man, are you gonna eat that?
Joey: *loud snoring as head rolls down into his chest*
Jenn: That looked like a nod.. I wouldn't eat that if I were you.
Daniel: Why not?
Nicole: Cuz he might eat you when he wakes up
Daniel: Good point
And yeah... it pretty much went on like that while we finished our food... they were snoring.. sleeping.. and well, Justin ended up with noodles in his hair... errr... more so than usual.
Dana: I think we should leave em here
Sarah: Yeah... they were crappy dates... we should let them wake up disoriented and away from home
Nicole: Sounds good to me.. I think Lance was trying to make a move, too... I'm not gonna take that kind of crap... I don't care if he's from Mississippi... I'm from Minneapolis, dammit!
Kia: What'd he do?
Luke: It looks like he's been out this entire time...
Nicole: He put his hand in my lap
Nicole: When he started kinda swaying and I pushed him back up... I swear he was awake
Kia: If you say so
Daniel: So are we going?
Sarah: Lemme just get pictures of them with food all over their faces and then we can go
So we waited for Sarah to get her pics and then we left them there. Uhh... let's just say that when they did wake up, they were greeted by a couple hundred teenyboppers with merchandise and cameras... and one big ol' headache. =0)
Many shpanks to the lovely characters. =0) Go ahead and check out Daniel's Site if ya want to. *I figured I'd plug him, since he didn't really get to pick up chicks with Joe... sorry buddy* Anyhoo...Thanks everybody! Luv Ya!!