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Welcome to Matthews Home Page

Matthews Home Page

Hey! So this is my website...I hope you enjoy it. I am a student at Cal Poly Pomona-Electrical an Computer Engineering. Go on down and look at my page, its got links, ramblings and more crap. If you want to get a hold of me i'm usually online watching tv or studying. Chances are you will get a hold of me.

im me(matthewd4)

or email me(matthewd4@aol.com)

 4/1/00
 Its the first of the month ladies and gentlemen. So I will start this great month of whatever the hell month it is with a quote. Mind you, this is no ordinary quote, it is by a genius. "You are not a real man until you dip your pen in ink." I believe that was THE big sex talk between my dad and I.
3/30/00
 FUCK MICROSOFT
Old Ramblings, 1
Weekly Hit list

1)Cubans.
2)Guess who once again gets on the list!!! Thats right ladies and gentlemen, my sister.
3)What the hell is that guys name? Reagis, thats it. He needs to die along with his lame ass tv show as well as the wannabe tv shows.
4)Any television show that begins with "Judge".
5)Blah.

In no shape way or form will I actually have to balls to hurt these people.

Funnies

1)People spend more time looking for the remote control than actually getting their ass up and changing it themselves.
2)When people ask "Hey can i ask you a question?" Well ya really didnt give me a chance there now did ya buddy?
3)Pople who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
4)The Pillsbury doughboy is way too happy considering he has no dick, and gets poked all the time.
5)When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Obviously it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it?
6) People who call your house asking for a member of your family, so you tell them that they have the wrong number and then they ask if you are sure!?!? Yeah I live here dont I dumb ass? Dont you think I would know!?

If you have anything that pisses you off and is funny or whatever then email me (do that by clicking at the bottom of the page or its matthewd4@aol.com)

Here Are Some of My Favorite Web Sites

Anna K.
My Pictures
Calvin and Hobbes
The Perfect Woman

Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?

A: To turn the blinker off.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a guy?

A: The blonde has the higher sperm count.

An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. "I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?" The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story... I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun." The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?" Dumbfounded, the old man replied "No." The doctor finished, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!" "That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear." "That's kind of what I'm getting at..." replied the doctor.

Honey, Not Tonight! The husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained as usual, "I have a headache."
"Perfect," said her husband, "I was just in the bathroom powdering my thingy with aspirin...
You can take it orally or as a suppository, it's up to you!"
Three desperately ill men met with their doctor one day to discuss their options. One was an alcoholic, one was a chain smoker, and one was a homosexual. The doctor, addressing all three of them, said, "If any of you indulge in your vices one more time, you will surely die." The men left the doctor's office, each convinced that he would never again indulge himself in his vice. While walking toward the subway for their return trip to the suburbs, they passed a bar. The alcoholic, hearing the loud music and seeing the lights, could not stop himself. His buddies accompanied him into the bar, where he had a shot of whiskey. No sooner had he replaced the shot glass on the bar, he fell off his stool, stone cold dead. His companions, somewhat shaken up, left the bar, realizing how seriously they must take the doctor's words. As they walked along, they came upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground, still burning. The homosexual looked at the chain smoker and said, "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead." Thank you for visiting my page at Angelfire. Please come back and visit again!
Last updated 1/23/2000

Email: matthewd4@aol.com
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