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Little Red Riding Ageha and the Big Bad Nana


Ume: Once upon a time, in a country called Jipangu... there lived a young woman... er... man... er... person named Ageha.

Ageha: Hallo! ::skips around in his cloak::

Ume: One day, Ageha fell down.

Ageha: ::falls down::

Ume: He tore his cloak, and he didn't have any other blue ones.

Ageha: Oh rats, my spiffy blue cloak! I must buy a new one!

Ume: So he went to the Akai Clothing Store.

Ageha: ::skips off::

Shuri: ::working the register:: Irasshaimase.

Ageha: Hi! I want a blue cloak!

Shuri: ::slashes out Ageha's left eye:: We only carry red clothes, ahou! You want blue, go see Aoi Clothing Store.. that queer-ass Asagi runs it.

Ageha: o.x Oh... umm... a red cloak is fine... ::buys a red cloak and an eyepatch:: (Although I don't know why since he cut my eye out...)

Ume: And so Ageha became known as Little Red Riding Ageha because he... is..big... and.. wears red.. and apparently has a good reputation in bed. That's where the riding comes from.

Nana: Hey, we're not at that part yet!

Ume: Oh, sorry. So one day, Little Red Riding Ageha had to make a visit to see Granny Sarasa.

Sarasa: Why do I have to be Granny?!

Ume: Because I say so.

Ageha: La la la, off to see Granny Sarasa! ::swings his basket with Kagerou inside::

Nana: ::jumps out of the bushes in a sexy little outfit:: Raor. I'm the wolf.

Ageha: I'm not s'pposed to talk to strangers!

Nana: I'm not a stranger! ::purrs::

Ageha: ... That's not a wolf noise.

Nana: Oh. Damn... well, then can I lick you? That's a wolf thing.

Ageha: I have to go see Granny Sarasa! Right there through the woods! ::points::

Nana: Oh, I see. I'll let you go then.

Ume: And so Little Red Riding Ageha went skipping down the road. But little did he know that the Nana wolf was already way ahead of him.

Nana: ::running through the woods:: Gotta get there gotta get there...

Ume: And she got there in the nick of time. She could just see Little Red Riding Ageha skipping down the lane. She pushed Granny Sarasa out of bed-

Sarasa: OOF!

Ume: And pulled up the blankets, hiding her favorite handcuffs and ropes.

Ageha: ::knocks on the door:: Granny Sarasa, Granny Sarasa, let me in!

Nana: Come in deary! Oh, Tatara-nii-chan..! ::mock-tears::

Ageha: ::skips in:: Hi Granny Sarasa! I brought you Kagerou!

Kagerou: ~v~ {This is humiliating.}

Nana: Just put him down and come a little closer...

Ageha: ::does:: My, Granny Sarasa, what pretty hair you have...

Nana: The better to wash, my dear...

Ageha: And what big eyes you have, Granny Sarasa...

Nana: The better to shine when I see you, dear little Ageha...

Ageha: And, oh, Granny Sarasa, what a big pretty mouth you have!

Nana: The better to eat you with!! ::pounces on Ageha, tying him up:: O-HOHOHOHOO!!

Ume: ::closes the book:: O.o;;;; Um... the... story's over.. no more...

Hayato: ::reaches and puts his arms around Ume:: Really?

Ume: O.o... And they all lived happily ever after.. ::gets carried away by Hayato::