Wednesday, November 6 2002
I have a test tomorrow and I should be studying, but for some reason i'm updating. i just came back from making dinner for Bennett. i owed him dinner because he swiped me in earlier today, because i left my card in my room. so i made him this linguini with red bell pepper sauce with fresh cilantro, basil, and tomatoes...it was good.
Today in medieval studies, my professor was writing sentences from people's papers on the chalkboard, and people were laughing at them, and voting which ones were the funniest...and one of them was mine. i felt so shitty that people were making fun of me, even if they didnt know it was me. it doesnt matter. so the entire hour i couldnt even pay attention, i was panicking about how i did on the paper. i was zoning out until class was over, and got my paper, and i didnt even do that badly. i got a 78. other people got 70-somethings too, so i actually didnt feel bad at all. i was actually planning on waiting until i got back to my room so i could cry openly, but i was actually really relieved. mm.
yesterday i was hanging out with mike from my medieval studies class and he seemed to think that i'm really comfortable with the disfiguring scars on my arm for some reason. he was talking abou them openly, and even pointing them out to other people! i stopped wearing my arm band because i felt that people wouldnt notice anymore, or that they wouldnt make comments...i think ill start wearing it again, but i left my blue one at home.
so yesterday i went to the aggies for israel meeting, and today i tabled in the quad and i saw hadar both times. i can't describe this fascination i have with him. it's like he's everything that i look for in a guy. it's true that i don't know him very well yet, but from what i do know he's really intelligent, patient, nice, likes good music (punk and metal, etc.), is israeli (and jewish) (::salivates::), and is really fucking hot. his girlfriend is really nice and i was talking to her today and im afraid that if i get too chummy with her, it might ruin things in the future. i really want to be friends with him though, even if some kind of romance doesnt work out. also, i like don in a really sincere way. like, its not some crazy passionate obsession, even though i'm really attracted to him, but its more of a calm, caring for him. ilke, i care about him a lot, im attracted to him, and i like him. i egg him on in his relationships with other girls, even though i want him for myself, but theres some part of me that just wants him to be happy. well, a pretty big part.
moving on, i hear its supposed to rain tonight, tomorrow, and the day after. that sucks. its supposed to rain a lot on friday, and i dont have an umbrella up here yet, and i have to take the bus to class because i dont want to ride my bike in the rain.
today larry and i went grocery shopping together. well, he came along while i did grocery shopping. he bought salami. heh. afterward he and i went to don's and experienced "boxcore" for the first time. i can't wait for his band (BUI) to play a show.
um, yea. i guess that's it, everybody's caught up.
End of transmission, 20:03
Shitty Experience of the Day: Getting Laughed At by my MST20A Class
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Friday, November 8 2002
wow my shift key works again. i almost had to write the date in roman numerals. haha. that would have been funny. speaking of *, nevermint i cant talk about that. umm yea. the weather here is sorta shitty right now. i love the fall and everything, but it sucks to have to ride your bike through mud and rain to get to class and then come back and have your bike all wet and cold. at least i remember to cover my seat with a plastic bag. i wish i could just take the bus to class and that be the end of it.
i'm not doing too badly in my classes. aside from the 78 on my medieval studies class (well, that class is hard anyway), im getting 99%'s on everything i do in my hebrew class, and i got 2 grades back in my design class. i got an A on my crown project, and an A- on my research paper...but it said on top of the paper that it was "late"...it wasnt late. i know that. so i went up to my professor after class and reminded him that it was on time, and he remembered me handing it to him, so he's going to raise it to like an A or something. *and* he knows my name. MY name. in a class of 220 people. he knows my name. yay! i think im one of his favorites. i hope so, but it doesnt really matter because im getting an A anyway. wel it IS my major (design, dummy), so an A doesnt really hurt. actually, i sorta need all A's, so i can get financial aid. i don't have any money, and if i get bad grades, then why should the school help me out? what if i threaten to drop out....
there's no class on monday because it's veteran's day, so this is going to be a 3-DAY-WEEKEND, baby! i can't wait. i wonder what i can find to waste my time on. actually, im not so excited about having a 3-day weeknend as much as i am about not having to go to medieval studies 4 times next week. i only have to go *3* times. aw, *'s make me all teary-eyed. well, not teary-eyed, but sentimental. squishy, even. mmm. only a few more hours...
theres a Clearing Autumn Skies show today in Vacaville, and i want to go, but not only because mike's hot.
so i have to sign up for classes in like less than a week. i'm sorta freaked out, because my schedule don't look so pretty. the way i see it, i'd have hebrew every day from 9am-10am, then on tuesdays and thursdays i'd have to haul ass to my history of medieval/renaissance art class from 10am-12pm. i'd have chem every day (except for tuesdays) from 2pm-3pm, except on thursdays when i'd have it from 1-4. SHITTY. so that means i'd be in class for 6 hours on thursdays. 2 3-hour blocks. ew. then on wednesdays i'd have chem again from 5pm-6pm, and on tuesdays i'd have more art history from 2pm-3pm. ew. so thats a total of 17 hours. remember, o students of other universities, that uc davis goes by the quarter system. i.e. thats a shitload of class. this quarter i only had class for 13 hours. sheesh. maybe instead of art history, ill take something easier, lighten my load for next quarter, and take art history later. nah. i might just leave it. i also want to take sculpture, furniture design, wood properties (carving, etc.), and metal properties (welding, etc.). oooh the possibilities.
so here's how it goes: i have class in an hour and a half and 12 pages of reading to do, so im going to make like a fetus and head out. HAHA. cracks me up, every time. later, sluts.
Candy Item of the Day: Chocolate Pumpkin Balls
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Saturday, November 9 2002
Today Larry, Eric, and i went to the arboretum on campus. it was really cool. we hiked over there and just chilled on the dock and really appreciated nature. i started thinking to myself that maybe davis isnt so bad...and then it started pouring....the minute after we got indoors. yea, it's not so bad.
End of transmission, 22:00.
People of the Day: Eric and Larry
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Sunday, November 10 2002
I've been up since 8:30 this morning. that's really early....I crashed in Amy's bed for a nap at 10 last night and didn't wake up till this morning. I guess I was really tired.
I haven't done anything productive all day. I've been on the computer since i woke up and i've been working on website stuff all day. i might change the way the whole site looks, just because i finally have my frontpage cd and i can do that kind of stuff. oh joy.
oh wow. dean just told me that i look like pheobe cates....and i sorta agree. i do sorta look like her. i've never seen her before....
so yea, since i've been at the computer all day, i have nothing of interest to report except that Noaa and i had the funniest misunderstanding today. you should have been there
End of transmission, 20:56
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Monday, November 11 2002
Today has been the most productive day I think I've ever had. I woke up at 6:00am because the flock of hundreds of crows outside my window were really loud and obnoxious. I didn't want to wake up Amy or Evan, so i tried to keep myself busy outside of the room. So the first thing i did was take a shower, then i went to starbucks and had coffee while i waited for the supermarket to open (sad, huh?). then i went grocery shopping, and by the time i came back amy and evan were ready to get up, so i cleaned the room, put all the clothes away that my mom sent up, did some dishes, took out the recycling and the trash, cleaned my desk, washed off the window, *and* put up hanukkah lights, all before noon. i spent the rest of the day working on updating pictures and stuff, so enjoy. amy better as hell do the dishes, or im going to do something violent that someone will hold me accountable for later. that sucks. i also took pictures of our room before i cleaned it, so you guys can all see how we live. yay.
Um yea so i've been up for hella hours and im tired. later.
End of tranmission, 23:04
Video Game Console of the Day: PS2
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Wednesday, November 13 2002
Ok, so the dish situation had been heinous. We had nothing left. Well, not nothing. we had 3 saucers, 2 regular knives and a cutting knife, a funnel, and some cups, but nothing to eat with. well, i'm not too good for saucers, but seriously, that's insane. we had 2 full shopping bags full of dirty dishes and the smell had gotten so bad we had to buy that glade plug-in to cover up the smell. i told amy i would stab her (or something similar) if she didn't do the dishes by the end of today, and she agreed. so for breakfast, i had to use chopsticks and i ate straight out of the tupperware. by the time lunch rolled around i realized we only had *1* chopstick left. chopstick. singular, not plural (we'd used the other one to spread some jam onto a piece of toast), so I had to break the chopstick into 2 pieces and use those as chopsticks. really short chopsticks. so anyway, amy ended up doing the dishes and i didnt have to kill her. yay. you see, i would have done the dishes myself (i always do, too), but she promised she would do them. i would have done them regardless if they hadn't gotten so damn smelly. that's just insane.
so today i connected my PS2 to the stereo and i recorded hella video game music onto a tape. i'm also gonna record my "scorpions live with the berlin philharmonic orchestra" so i can make some killer mix tapes. i love mix tapes. ::sigh::. i still owe christank and melanie mixtapes, so i guess ill make them soon. i was going to make mike a mix tape too, but i don't know if i'm going to do that anymore. we don't even talk anymore. i won't get into that.
i hung out with Don today. i was walking to rite aid when i ran into him, so he went to rite aid with me. i bought more bleach for my hair and he bought black hair dye. he dyed his hair today, but i'm going to bleach mine later (don't freak out, i'm only bleaching the roots and redying the front. it's going to look new again.). then we walked to the supermarket and we did some grocery shopping and it was actually fun. ...i gradually realized that he's not interested in me anymore. it wasn't an epiphany, just a slow realization. i guess most people don't like to get back together with old flames. i see nothing wrong with it.
Anyway, i gotta get ready to go out. Larry and Eric are coming over in a bit and we're gonna go see Spinal Tap. I saw the first half with 'Dingleberry' and we were mindlessly bored, but maybe i was only bored because i was with barry. it's very possible. he's boring.
Oh! That reminds me. My dad e-mailed me again today. It's really weird. He's so stupid, he doesn't even try. He e-mails me once a month (September 12th, October 14th, and November 13th) with a really short message, and he sends Amy the exact same thing every time, too. he did that in our birthday cards too. we actually got our birthday cards late because the restraining order we had against him didn't expire until september 11th, and my birthday is september 9th, but believe me, that's not why i don't like him.
End of transmission, 19:27
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P.S. I just decided that I will no longer refer to my father as "dad," but as Menachem. Yesterday on my financial aid form I had to write my parent's names and addresses and it was the greatest feeling i'd experienced in a long time when I wrote "none" under "father's name." I'm free.
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Thursday, November 14 2002
Amy got hit by a bike again today. it was really funny. she gets into biking accidents all the damn time. usually its just with bushes and stuff, but today she had like a head-on collision with another biker. how funny.
what did happen today? not much. i wanted to update because i'm really bored. larry and eric and amy are going to spike and mikes twisted festival of animation in a couple minutes and don doesn't seem to want to do anything with me so i have no idea what i'm going to do all night. i guess i *could* start working on my papers.... i have a medieval studies paper about hussein due on monday, and then a midterm paper about design somethingorother due on tuesday. doom.
goddamn. i'm going to go to starbucks either today or tomorrow and badger them about a job. i really would rather work at starbucks because i could work really early in the morning, as opposed to later in the day when i'd rather be doing other things, like homework. i guess i could work at in-n-out, but i'm still afraid of pat, plus i wouldn't be able to work before school. i'd probably end up working at like midnight and it's pretty far away compared to starbucks. in-n-out is hella streets away, and starbucks is across the street. plus, when i got home next summer, i can work at *both* starbucks and in-n-out, and make major amounts of money. did i mention yet that i'm broke?
ok i really didn't feel like writing i guess.
End of transmission, 19:48
Bad Religion Song of the Day: A Streetkid Named Desire
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Monday, November 18 2002
I really wish i could just sleep right now. I don't think I've slept more than 4 hours a night in 3 weeks. Even on the weekends, those stupid crows wake up me. Last Saturday (the one before this one), i woke up at 10:30, Sunday I woke up at 8:30, and on Monday (Veteran's day)I woke up at friggin' 6. then all week ive been going to bed at like 2, 3, or 4, and I'm always waking up in the middle of the night. It sucks. Two days ago i think i tossed and turned for like 7 hours, and only slept about 2 hours...and not even a straight 2 hours, either. Last night i went to bed at 4:30 and woke up at 7:30 and I'm just *so* tired. I promised Eric (OE) I would go with him to the gym today after 6 sometime, and I hope i can get some sleep in before that. The shitty thing is that I can't crash all day anyway because i have a midterm paper due tomorrow for another class. shitty shit shit.
I shouldn't even be updating now. My paper is due in like 2 1/2 hours and I'm not done yet. I've been having a rough time writing it because i a) dont know that much about islam, and b) keep coming across all this anti-semitic propaganda and i just dont believe in what im supposed to write. it's crap. screw MST20A. theres no MST20B anywhere in *my* future.
End of transmission, 10:22
Song of the Day So Far: Nightfall by Blind Guardian
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Wednesday, November 20 2002
Ok so I've been really sleep-deprived, right? I've been sleeping less than 6 hours a night almost every single day for something like 3 weeks. Even on weekends, I've woken up at 8 am, 6 am, and even 5 am because of those stupid crows outside my window. You'd think that because I've been so tired I could just *sleep through* the loud cawing and sqwuaking (sp?), but i guess i'm just not that cool. So anyway, on top of that I've been pulling all nighters recently, so on sunday night i got 2 hours of sleep, then i took a 5 hour nap in the evening (ok, i guess that was a decent amount, but keep in mind i've barely slept in 3 weeks and 5 hours isnt gonna help me recuperate), and then that night i didnt sleep at all (i hung out at eric and larry's all evening, watched the *awesome* meteor shower at 2am, then went home at like 3 or 4), and i started my paper at like 4:30am and worked all night. so last night i decided to take a nap at 8:30pm, but i had an inkling i wouldn't wake up till i had to leave for class this morning, and i was right. I slept 11 hours last night. i'm still a little fatigued because ill need a little bit more full-nights-sleeps to get myself back to normal, but right now im a pretty happy clam. ok, thats not kosher...umm happy gefilte fish.
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Damn, sorry about that guys. there was just a fire alarm. ummm let's see, where was i? oh yea, 11 hours of sleep. umm yea but that story is over
I've been hanging out with Larry and Eric a whole bunch, they kick ass. (ooh, Evan's favorite Bad Religion song is playing on WinAmp right now.)Yesterday we watched Lolita with Eric and Kasey (one of their roommates) and then we went to the DC with Eric, and he said it was the only time he ate there outside of his job since freshman year, so it was like a trip or something. cool.
So I'm going home next thursday (the 28th) so I hope people like, call me up or stop by or something. i can't wait to see all my little slutty friends. yay!
I guess i don't have that much to report. i hope somebody will go with me to the dc (dining commons) because Amy's in class. Oh! Actually, she's getting out in an hour, she might go with me then.
End of transmission, 10:48
Unwelcomed Event of the Day: Fire Alarm
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Wednesday, November 27 2002
Ok I haven't written in forever because I've been mind-bogglingly busy since Saturday. I had to read two books and write a 6-page paper all by today, so needless to say I've barely slept in a while too. I miss all my davis friends because I haven't even seen them in days. Well, Larry was here yesterday when I dyed my hair black. My mom doesn't know that I dyed it purple and I dont wan't her to have a stroke or lash out at me, so I tried to dye it brown...well that just made it a burgandy color and that couldn't work, so I dyed it black....my hair is actually holding up pretty even though I dyed it twice in one day yesterday.
So Evan is driving Amy back home today and I'm getting a ride with Larry, who's also driving Don...it should be fun. We're going to stop in Berkeley on our way home and chill there for an hour or 2. that should be fun.
I feel really bad, because I want to give all my friends something heartfelt for the holidays, but I have no money so I can't buy anything and I have little time so I can't really make anything. i just know some people are going to feel left out, but the truth is that I really don't have any money. I had to let Amy borrow $300 today to pay some stupid college fees like tuition or some bullshit. We seriously have no money, and i have no idea how we're going to get it. Starbucks didn't hire me, but the manager said that it's because they're fully staffed right now, but he said that he's keeping my application for when they *are* hiring in like december or january. that's not so bad, but i need a job like *now*. i was thinking of making mix tapes and selling them, or putting together some sort of outdoor music festival and accept donations or whatever. I really worked hard to get into college and i'm trying to work hard to get the money but i FUCK hang on.
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