I know shes stopped thinking about me,
the moment I've walked out the door.
I'll think of her the entire drive home and still more.
Everyday and every night, shes in my dreams, shes in my mind.
She's killing me slowly from inside out.
She's killing my mind, emotion, and will no doubt.
She's taught me I can love again, only at a price.
But Im beginning to learn that I'm losing friends.
No more confused, deppresive, or hateful rymes.
No more deppresion or oppresion of any kind,
will I impose on my common man.
When if ever...? My friend tells me, "In due time."
I have so much more than him.
Yet, he posses the only thing I've wanted.
Am I selfish or unrealistic?
I like the song playing at 8:47 PM on a Sunday.
I don't necessarily relate to every word.
But I relate to the desire to be heard.
Some people call what I do a talent.
Some days I call it a curse, others not a talent but a blessing.
My friends think their the only reason I'm alive.
I'm telling you now thats nothing but a lie, "But sometimes the best thing is a lie."
This pen and paper is keeping my sanity for now.
If it were non existent I doubt I'd still know how.
I wonder how many of these pointless writings that don't find you, him, or her.
What am I going to do when I'm finished.
Sometimes I wonder if I ever will.
Or even if I've ever started.
Cover my ears that I might not hear your voice.
Cover my eyes dear God that I might not make the wrong choice.
I can't understand how someone of that much beauty, of that much grace,
would take the time to look me in the face.
So I maybe I should understand why,
she's forgotten me as soon as I've stepped outside her door.