January 30, 1981 - September 27, 1997
Every day a new picture is painted and framed, held up for half an hour,
in such light as the Great Artist chooses, and then withdrawn, and the curtain falls.
And then the sun goes down, and long the afterglow gives light.
And then the damask curtains glow along the western window.
And now the first star is lit, and I go home.
Henry David Thoreau
Aaron was 16 when he was killed in a fatal auto accident. He was a kind and giving person and I know that he would have wanted to help others live a better life. Nine people are now living better lives because of his gifts of organ/tissue donation. Although, for many of them, their disorders were not life threatening, I know that he has helped to improve the quality of their lives and has given them relief from pain. Months after Aaron's death, when I spoke to the director of the eye and tissue bank and learn how many he had help, it was the first time I had felt some happieness since the accident. It gave me joy to know that Aaron's gifts would live on.
Just two days before Mother's Day '99, I recieved a phone call from Vancover, Canada. It was the father of a two year old girl, calling to tell me that it was Aaron's gift that saved his daughter's life. When she was six months old the doctors found a whole in little Annie's heart. She would need surgery to replace her heart valves immediatly. Now, a year and a half later, she is fully recovered and she and her family will celebrate her second birthday in June.
It was Sept. 27, 1997, 7:15 PM when my life was changed forever. I was working on a painting of my daughter, Sonya, when I was overcome by an immense feeling of love for my children, a feeling I can not express with mere words. I felt enveloped in a protection of peace. Some time passed and then all of a sudden, one of Aaron's close friends burst in the front door "Christine, Aaron has been in an accidednt." It was surreal, I felt outside of myself, but surprizingly calm. It was as if I was being embraced by pure love. I learned later that the time of Aaron's passage into the next world was 7:15 PM. I believe that it was him that I was feeling, giving me strength for was I was about to learn.
On January 4, 1997 Aaron and Sonya's dad, Phil, died of a heart attack. Aaron's way of dealing with this was to go hiking almost every day in the mountains where our home is. He said that is where he felt closest to his dad. The day before his accident, Aaron told me that he was sitting on his bed and when he looked into the mirror, he saw Phil. He said "mom, it was real, I wasn't imagining it." I feel that Phil had come to tell him that there was nothing to fear, and that he would be there to meet him on the other side. Moments before he told me this, we had passed a cross on the side of the road, undoubtedly the scene of a fatal accident, he told me that he did not fear death, that it was not an end.
About Aaron, he was a kind soul, a free thinker and a peacemaker amongst his peers. I thought one day he would be a leader. He enjoyed the beauty of nature and spent much of his time hiking in the forest where he and his sister were born and raised. His friends said they had their own naturalist to lead the hikes. He always had a thirst for knowledge, especially regarding local plants and wildlife. When he was only four years old he would assist the naturalists at the out door school where we lived and worked, and amazed the sixth grade students when he named the plants and pointed out constellations.
His interests were in natural history, marine life, paleontology, archeology and social issues. He also had a profound respect for Native American peoples and agreed with thier philoslphy on living in harmony with nature.
A couple of Aaron's favorite quotes:
"The Earth does not belong to us, we belong to the Earth.
We do not weave the web of life, we are merely a strand in it.
That which we do to the strand, we do to ourselves."
Chief Seattle.
"Imaginations is more important than knowledge"
Albert Einstien
He was aslo fascinated by aerospace technology. In junior high he was chosen to repesent the school district and participate in a program at the local college sponsored by NASA. It was a competition where students work around the colck for 36 hours to design a "Mars-Orbiting Space Settlement."
Aaron was creative and artisic and won awards at school for his artwork. He loved music. His favorite band was Pink Floyd, with thirteen CD's in his collection including a special gold plated addition of "Wish You Were Here," and a couple of books about the band. He liked reading about what inspired the band and what the songs were about. He thought, this is some pretty amazing song writing to still be so popular even with new generations, some thirty years later.
He had just bought himself a Jembe, an African style drum. I was impressed by how quickly he had that down. When I commented on how quickly he learned it, he said, "you just kind of feel it."
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Only six weeks before the accident he returned from
an intense three week backpacking trip into the High
Sierra on an "Outward Bound" excursion. With a group
of 9 teens and 4 guides he learned to use low impact
camping and mountaineering skills and rock climbing.
He loved this experience so much that he was
considering a career as a guide. His school now has a
scholarship in Aaron's and his father's name that will
send one student each year on an Outward Bound trip.
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Aaron - Rock Climbing (8/97) |
Aaron - The High Sierras, CA (8/97) |
Just two days before Aaron's memorial service, his girlfrend, Sarah took a home pregnacy test. To my delight and everyone who knew Aaron, it was positive. My grandson, Malakai Dean Wiseman, was born on June 16, 1998, and I was there to welcome him into the world. It was a very emotional event, family and many of Aaron and Sarah's friends waited outside the delivery room. The hospital staff seemed a little annoyed at the size of our group, which well exceeded that of the hospital rules, but they didn't dare say they had to leave. When they heard the doctor announce, "it's a boy," I could hear the cheering. Sonya, who was with that crowd, said that everyone was crying uncontrollable tears of joy, most of all herself. Needless to say, the same was happening inside the delivery room.
I probably don't have to tell you how much he has brightened our world.
It is bittersweet, and so sad that Malakai won't have his daddy to take him on hikes and teach him about the world. But he will know his father through all of us. I started telling him about his daddy from day one. Malakai will never be lacking in love, for his family goes way beyond the nuclear unit. He is the most delightful child, always happy, always reaching for a hug when someone walks in, including all of Aaron's closest friends. To me this was the most precious gift that Aaron could leave us.
I LOVE YOU AARON.
Influenced by North Winds
Butterfly clan
Beating wings whisper
through tree tops
Hearts beat slower
sun sinks fast in the soul
The Earth has always welcomed your footsteps
They were gentle
full of respect,
wisdom and strength.
Flames dance brightly
drums beat
when your spirit is near
And since your were small
You were on the trail
just ahead of us.
written by Julie Soto, 9/28/97
