Here we see a groggy President Clinton trying to intelligantly discuss the

Kosovo situation after being up all night watching scrambled breasts on

Pay-Per-View.

"I'm go'in say this once, I did not have sex with that Serbian Dictator Ms. Malosivige."

Speaking out about Kosovo in the White House this week, President Clinton was

stunned when Madline Albright had a bad reaction to some jet lag medications,

stripped naked, and began doing jumping jacks.

"Yes mame, I can promise with some authority that if elected President, I will indeed

keep my goddam paws off your Jello."

Here Pentagon spokesman Kenneth Bacon insists that if he were ever alone in a room

with Slobidon Malosivige he would claw his eyes out, "I..... I swear to god I would, I.....

well, I would."

Becoming parched in the middle of a long cabinet meeting in Moscow, Russian Prime Minister

Yuvgimmy Premicauff requests a large mug of melted butter to quench his thirst.

Wilson and Morgon had learned the hard way that if you made fun of Fenton's tiny right hand,

he would slap you with his overgrown left hand.

"Hey lady, Parcheesy, Candyland, Wrists, whatever you want to play, your the guest.

No matter how one of Bernie's long winded stories started, it always ended with the

Prasitute paying him.

AND this week on a very special JAG.

David Link was a great office worker but, if you made fun of his giant shamrock,

he would turn beat red and start throwing sloppy, uneffective punches at you.

"LOOK OUT, I'M GO'IN HURL."

Defensive about the daycore of his office, immediately upon sitting down with visiting

diplomats Cambodan Prime Minister Hung San says "This is all my wife's SH**."

Jimmy Dell was determined to jump his riding mower over 15 school buses backwards

but Jimmy Dell just ended up hurting his head again.

Here we see a tourist in New York City giving the international

sign for please steal my purse.

As always, Dan Quail wades through an inthuesastic crowd never quite sure if there

putting him on.

AND FINALLY,

"Here's a good one Mr. Buwcannon, I am a welfare mother trying to raise 9 children

on $300 dollars a month."

Dennis: ("Be a little charitiable, give me some applause to get out on.")