Where have I been? Garden of Ewoks...


You may ask yourself... how did I get here? Oh wait... wrong question.
Actually, you might be saying "What is 'Garden of Ewoks?' and why is it on a Liz Phair page?" Well I am here to explain it to you.
I used to... and still do, actually... want to be able to play guitar. I got a guitar, and I got lessons. First I had this loser guitar teacher, but then I switched to a different place with a cool guy. The way the lessons worked was I brought in a song I wanted to learn how to play, and he transcribed it for me. I was supposed to practice, but... well... Anyway. That's beside the point.
So one fine day, I brought in Whip-Smart because I wanted to learn how to play none other than "May Queen." So my teacher (his name is Chris, by the way) listened to it so he could transcribe the music and all, and when he heard the line "Got any what?" he was like "Is she saying 'Garden of Ewoks?'" Uhhh... Yeah Chris. Garden of Ewoks.

Well, I gots to give the man some credit. It would make a pretty funny song. "Where have I been? Garden of Ewoks..."



MORE MISHEARD LYRICS!!

Legend: Misheard lyric
                Actual lyric


6'1"

  • "You're like a lie that keeps climbing higher" -CTO@LinkToIt.com
      "You're like a mime that keeps climbing higher" -Yours truly
      "You're like a vine that keeps climbing higher."

    • BIG TALL MAN

  • "Yes I'm winning, spinning, I see the boulevard emerging from all sides/And it feels good/I can leave when I'm ready" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Yes I'm winning, spinning, I feel energy being pulled up from all sides/And it feels good/Like relieving a headache"

    • CHOPSTICKS

  • "'Cause secretly I'm dented" -Headache79@aol.com
      "'Cause secretly I'm timid"

    • CINCO DE MAYO

  • "Just Dallas falling down, no deeper than full" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Just Alice falling down a deepening hole"

    • DANCE OF THE SEVEN VEILS

  • "I have got a bright and shiny ladder" -Danaldj@aol.com
      "I have got a bright and shiny bladder" -moi
      "I have got a bright and shiny platter"

  • "You can't rim in a an hour/ I know all about that ugly girl poor thing/ In the end you bring her mayflowers." -CTO@LinkToIt.com
      "You can rent me by the hour/ I know all about the ugly pilgrim thing/ Entertainers bring mayflowers."

    • DON'T HAVE TIME

  • "It's a little kid now, but you don't need no kid" -Headache79@aol.com
      "It's a little kid now, pudgy dumb little kid"

  • "Don't have time for your fear, your tears, your pivotal peace" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Don't have time for your fear, your truth, and your queer little feats"

  • "Don't remember feeling older any worse than feeling wouldn't add alone" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Don't remember feeling older any worse than feeling wooden and alone"

    • EXPLAIN IT TO ME

  • "Blame injection" -CTO@LinkToIt.com
      "Fame injection"

  • "Head underwater keeps him proper" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Head underwater keeps getting hotter"

    • FLOWER

  • "Your dick's so perfect for sucking, massaging" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Your lips a perfect suck me size"

    • FUCK AND RUN

  • "Letters and soldiers" -DocGould@aol.com
      "Letters and sodas"

    • GLORY

  • "Circling the tiny one" -CTO@LinkToIt.com
      "Circa 1981"

    • HEADACHE

  • "I'm a sexmanic sister" -robin@breyl.de
      "I'm a psychosomatic sister"

    • HELP ME, MARY

  • "Temper my hatred with peas" -me
      "Temper my hatred with peace"

    • IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF

  • "You've got alot of nerve, after all the bills you left me" -Headache79@aol.com
      "You've got alot of nerve, after all it wasn't me who left"

    • JEALOUSY

  • "I know it's just a drawer full of grass" -me
      "I know it's just a drawer of photographs"

  • "Standing on a mudflat watching the seven flies" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Standing on the mudflats, watching the salmon fly"

  • "He's got a family who'll do your hair" -jaime227@exploremaine.com
      "He's got a family who deals heroin"

    • MAY QUEEN

  • "You could have planted a farm/With all of them hussies" -me
      "You could have planted a farm/With all of them hay seeds"

  • "Got any what? Disease, has she a mind?" -pwwerleft@yahoo.com
      "Got any what? Disease, hashish, a mind?"

    • NASHVILLE

  • "I won't die from it, my love" -Headache79@aol.com
      "I won't decorate my love"

    • SUPERNOVA

  • "Your lips are sweet and slippery like a sheriff's bare red ass." -Numerous people and the guitar book for Whip-Smart
      "Your lips are sweet and slippery like a cherub's bare wet ass."

  • "Your kisses are as wicked as an abcessed tooth" -iamamayqueen@aol.com
      "Your kisses are as wicked as an F-16"

    • SUPPORT SYSTEM

  • "Lions and tigers tearing at their fur" -Headache79@aol.com
      "Lions and tigers tearing at their food"

    • WHIP-SMART

  • "When the do the double dutch, that's a nancy"-CTO@LinkToIt.com
      "When they do the double dutch, that's romancing" -CTO's friend
      "When they do the double dutch, that's them dancing"

    • X-RAY MAN

  • "You can see through my soul" -Headache79@aol.com
      "You can see through the smoke"




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