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NOTRE DAME, IN (AP) - "The key is to maintain constant motion."


  • Ugly girl gets laid, credits lack of competition
  • Beautiful rainbow in boys' bathroom as flood waters recede
  • Caveny sees Passion for 27th time; has dirty Mel Gibson dream again
  • Gunn makes late night run to Meier; returns with Bob Marley CD, Doritos, and some shiny objects
  • Linster, Murray bemoan lack of funny Fr. Mike skits
  • Law review staffer twitches nervously
  • 1L reveals crush on Amy Barrett
  • Prof. Casey upgrades to DSL; reports free time at record high