THIS JUST IN..........Justin Timberlake HAS been found we repeat, Justin Timberlake HAS been found. Police officials located the Tennessee native crossing the boarder into Canada. Timberlake was flown down to Mississippi for questioning today. There, he was reunited with mother-to-be KB. KB once again, denied a pregnancy ALONG WITH any ties with Timberlake. She proceeded to attack Timberlake viciously using fingernails, kicking, and biting as methods for attack. Officials believe this to be penned up aggression for Timberlake running away from his responsibilities. Mad that he would run away from his child AND her in an obvious time of need, KB resorted to physical violence. KB left the station with JC Chasez. They were reported to have been holding hands and kissing on the way out. We have since been informed that Chasez was using all methods possible to calm the upset mother down.
Timberlake will be questioned later on this evening about his connection with the Bass/Toby case. When questioned, Bass said "I just don't want to believe that someone I care so much about would have something to do with the death of my beloved Toby." I they are watching, our hearts go out to Toby's family tonight.
In other news, Bri and Joey Fatone have returned from their trip to Texas where they were reported to have been making wedding arrangements. When asked who they were helping out Laskey replied "We're getting married and we wanted to make sure the church I wanted is available on the date I wanted." They seem to be covering up for friends of theirs that do not wish to be revealed although speculators believe, the arrangements are being made for KB and Justin Timberlake who are (by their parents) being forced to marry due to the expected child.
This still leaves the question about Bri and Fatone's relationship open for debate. Though the two spend countless hours together day and night, they still have not made any public announcement that they're together and....and...er..a.sda'...excuse me...HEY...That's MY microphone........Hi, this is Bri of Freshman Class and I would just like to set a few things straight. First of all. KB hates Justin Timberlake. She wants nothing more than to see him get hit by a bus. She is NOT pregnant with his child either. She on the other hand IS dating JC Chasez. They have been together for quite a while now and it's only a matter of time before JC pops the same question to Kel...I mean, KB as Joey did to me. Which brings me to my next comment. Joey and I are engaged. I'll repeat, we're ENGAGED. We've been dating and f***ing since before the tour started. We're in love....YES...We are together. That answers your questions. I swear, if I hear anything more about it not being clear that we're together then I'm personally going to kick every single one of y'all's asses. Thank you...here's your microphone.
........................Um...Well, thank you Bri. I have no idea what just happened...but you heard it folks. Bri does know about the relationship between Justin Timberlake and KB. She's aware of the tension between Timberlake and Chasez. And she STILL will not shed any insight on her relationship with Fatone.
In our final report, several reporters, cameramen, and technicians were severely beaten by famous Pop Star Bri. No charges are being pressed because...well frankly, no one wants to piss Bri off any further. This incident has brought attention to a much needed break from the Freshman Class relationship with N'Sync for a while. So until any more exciting news happens, we will put these stories to rest.