Nick was crying uncontrollably when he felt a pair of strong arms lift him back on his feet and into a nearby chair. He looked up and saw Kevin and the other guys standing near him.
"I lost her…again," he sobbed. "I PROMISED that I wouldn't let anything happen to her again, I PROMISED!" he yelled through tears.
"Nick, you couldn't do anything," said Kevin trying to hold back his own tears. The rest of the guys were trying to do the same. They weren't very successful; a few tears have escaped from all of their eyes.
"Yes I could, I could've listened to her explanation instead of being the moron that I am and running out on her!" exclaimed Nick burying his head in his hands as his body shook from his sobs.
"You were angry and hurt and you…" started Brian.
"Shut up, listen!" said Nick all of sudden snapping his head up. He couldn't be sure of what he heard, but he knew that it was something. Surely enough, a few seconds later Nick heard it again, a faint beeping of Julie's heart monitor. "SHE'S ALIVE!" he yelled and rushed up to her bed.
Howie ran into the hallway to get Dr. Feldman, who had stepped out to give the guys some privacy, "Doctor, she's alive!" yelled Howie excitedly.
"That's impossible!" exclaimed Dr. Feldman and ran back into the room. He looked at Julie's heart monitor and saw that, indeed, she was alive, barely, but she was alive. "I don't believe this, she was declared dead!"
"I knew she wouldn't give up…not this time," said Nick fresh tears of happiness starting to fall from his eyes.
"Doctor, will she be okay?" asked AJ worriedly.
"I don't know, but she seems to be breathing and she has a pulse, even if it is a weak one," said the doctor thoughtfully looking at Julie. "We might be able to fix her internal bleeding now," he added.
"Will she survive the surgery?" asked Brian his eyes filling with fear.
"She might," said the doctor shrugging. "But we'll never know unless we try."
"What are her chances of survival without surgery?" asked Nick grasping onto Julie's limp hand.
"Almost zero," replied Dr. Feldman.
"Please do everything that you can to save her," begged Nick.
"We will, now if you five will kindly step out of the room, we need to get Julie prepped for surgery," said Dr. Feldman slowly ushering the group out.
The guys came out of the room and back into the waiting area, where they collapsed on some chairs.
"What happened?" asked Rachel weakly.
"We almost lost her," replied Nick. He heard Rachel draw in a sharp breath. "But she's alive, and she's being prepared for surgery as we speak," he added quickly.
Rachel and Justin both let out sighs of relief.
"Thank God," said Justin leaning his head back against the wall.
"Definitely," agreed Rachel and put her head on Justin's shoulder.
"But there's some bad news too," said Brian sadly.
"What?" asked Rachel raising her head from Justin's shoulder.
"The doctor doesn't know if Julie will survive the surgery," said Brian resting his chin on his hands.
"The doctor might not know, but I know," declared Nick. Everyone looked at him. "Julie WILL survive it because she won't give up, not again."
"Are you sure?" asked Rachel shakily.
"Yes, I'm positive," said Nick determinedly.
A few hours later everyone was sitting in the waiting room anxiously waiting for any news on Julie. Jessica, Jennifer, Angela, and Stacey had already arrived by then too and were sitting tensely near their boyfriends. Nick sat by himself in a corner. He looked at his friends and felt a pang in his heart; he was the only one sitting there without someone to hold.
He then got up not being able to handle the tension anymore, "I'm going to go clear my head," he said and walked out of the room before anyone had a chance to say one word. Nick walked outside of the hospital and leaned on the wall running his hand through his hair. He was standing with his eyes closed for a good ten minutes before he was interrupted.
"Excuse me?" said a voice. Nick opened his eyes and looked down. He found himself looking at a girl who couldn't have been more than ten years old.
"Yes?" he said kneeing down so that he was at her eye level.
"Are you Nick Carter?" asked the little girl.
"Yes I am, and what's your name?" asked Nick kindly smiling at the girl.
"I'm Michelle," she said sticking out her hand. Nick shook it gently.
"It's nice to meet you Michelle," he said.
"You too, why are you sad?" asked Michelle, looking at Nick with her big brown eyes.
"Because my fiancée is in this hospital, and she isn't doing so well," said Nick choking back tears.
"Oh, my sister is in this hospital too," said Michelle sadly looking at the ground.
"What's wrong with your sister?" asked Nick.
"She has leu…um…leuk…" said Michelle trying to pronounce the word.
"Leukemia," pronounced Nick.
"Yeah, that's it," said Michelle. "The doctors said that she was going to die in about a month," she added softly and a single tear fell from her eye.
"I'm sorry to hear that," said Nick sympathetically. "How old is your sister?"
"She's eleven," replied Michelle. Nick shook his head in disbelief, the girl was so young, and dying. "Can I ask you a favor?" asked Michelle looking right into Nick's eyes.
"Of course," he said.
"Jennie, that's my sister's name, is a very big fan of you, can I have your autograph so that I could give it to her?" asked Michelle. Nick smiled.
"How about I'll do something better?" he asked. He raised himself to his full height and walked with Michelle back into the hospital. "What's your sister's room number?"
"415," replied Michelle curiously looking at Nick. "Why?"
"You'll see, go there and wait a few minutes," said Nick grinning at the girl. Michelle grinned back and nodded her head. She ran back to her sister's room, while Nick went back to the ICU waiting room.
"Hey guys," he said to his friends.
"You okay?" asked AJ.
"No, but I do have a question to ask you," said Nick taking a deep breath. "There's a little girl in this hospital, her name is Jennie, she's only eleven years old, and she's dying from leukemia," said Nick. "I met her ten year old sister, Michelle, outside and she told me that Jennie is a fan of us, how about we go visit this little girl?" suggested Nick looking at his band mates.
"That's a wonderful idea Frack," said Brian getting up. The other guys got up too. Nick smiled as the group made their way up to room 415. They all stood in front of the room.
"Hey Michelle, can we come in?" called Nick opening the door slightly, but not showing himself.
"Yeah!" came Michelle's excited voice from inside. Nick opened the door and him and the guys went in. They saw Michelle sitting next to a girl who resembled her quite a lot. But while Michelle's soft brown hair fell to her waist, the girl in the bed barely had any hair at all, probably due to the radiation treatments. Jennie sat up excitedly as she saw the five guys.
"Oh my God!" she exclaimed. "You're the Backstreet Boys!"
The guys grinned and came up to her.
"Yes we are, it is very nice to meet you Jennie," said Nick extending his hand to her. Jennie shook each of their hands staring in amazement.
"How do you know my name?" she asked smiling.
"I talked to Michelle here, and she told me that you were a fan," replied Nick grinning at Michelle, who was smiling widely.
"I can't believe that you're here!" said Jennie. "Can I have your autograph?" she asked taking a CD from her lap and holding it out to the guys.
"Of course," said Brian taking the CD. The guys took turns signing it and then gave it back to Jennie, who beamed with happiness.
"So Jennie, what's your favorite song?" asked Kevin.
"'I Want It That Way'" replied Jennie curiously looking at Kevin.
"Well then," grinned Kevin and turned to the other four guys. "Three, two, one," he counted off.
"Tell me why," sang Nick.
"Ain't nothin' but a heartache," sang the other four guys.
"Tell me why," sang Nick again.
"Ain't nothin' but a mistake," continued the guys, "Tell me why."
"I never wanna hear you say," sang Nick.
"I want it that way," they all sang in a perfect a capella.
Jennie squealed with delight. "Wow!" she exclaimed.
"I hope you liked that," said Howie smiling.
"I LOVED it!" said Jennie bursting with happiness.
"We're glad," said Kevin. At that moment Jess opened the door to the room.
"Julie's out of surgery," she informed the guys and Nick's happy expression was immediately replaced with a nervous one.
"Jennie, Michelle, I'm really sorry, but we have to leave," said Brian turning to Jennie.
"It's okay, I'm really glad that you came, this is the best day of my life," said Jennie smiling.
"We're happy that we've made you so happy," said AJ.
"You did," replied Jennie.
"Nick, I hope your fiancée feels better," said Michelle looking at Nick.
"Thank you," said Nick, touched by her simple words. The guys all hugged Jennie and Michelle, said their goodbyes, and left. They got back to the ICU ward and saw Justin once again pacing.
"How is she?" asked Nick anxiously.
"Well, she's out of surgery, but she's unconscious," said Justin shaking his head. Nick closed his eyes and took a deep breath to keep himself calm. "Do they know anything yet?"
"No, Dr. Feldman said that it was going to be at least another few hours until they know something for sure," replied Rachel. She looked very worn out, and Nick suspected that he didn't look any better.
"Nick, you should go get something to eat, I bet you haven't eaten since morning," said Angela. Nick didn't want to tell her that he actually hadn't eaten since the previous day. He was too distracted by thoughts of Julie to eat in the morning.
"She's right Frack, you should go to the hotel and get some rest, eat, change clothes," said Brian gently.
"I can't leave her," said Nick stubbornly.
"We'll all stay here," said Jen referring to herself and the rest of the guys' girlfriends. "You guys should really go back to the hotel and freshen up."
"I can't leave her," repeated Nick.
"Nick, you heard what Rachel said, they won't know anything for a few hours, let's all go back to the hotel and get some rest," said Howie. "That includes you two," he said pointing at Rachel and Justin. They nodded silently.
Nick's shoulders slumped in defeat, "Fine, I'll go, but I'm coming right back."
"We all are, now come on," said Kevin putting his arm around Nick and leading him out of the waiting room, with the rest of the group plus Justin and Rachel walking behind them.

chapter 10 chapter 12