Chapter Twenty-One



Nick was excited as he was getting dressed to go and spend a few hours away from the hospital. He was happy when Dr. Gaynor told him he could go. There were so many things that Nick wanted to do, wanted to see. He completely forgot about his limitations at the moment.

Jess was trying to think of places that Nick would want to go to. Everything she thought of would be impossible since he was in a wheelchair and she didn’t have the physical strength to help him. She was beginning to wonder if this was such a good idea after all. She was afraid that after this trip he would become even more depressed. Taking a deep breath, she pushed the door open to Nick’s room.

“I’m ready to go.” Nick was sitting in his chair, dressed. The smile on his face was something that Jess hadn’t seen in weeks.

“Do you know where you want to go?” Jess asked.

“I don’t care where I go, I just want to get the hell away from this place. I am so sick of it.” Nick replied.

“Okay, I guess I’ll have to lead the way since you won’t know where you’re going.” Jess turned and opened the door for Nick.

As they were in the elevator, Jess kept thinking about all of the obsticals that Nick would encounter and wondered if he was up to it. The first hurdle would be him getting into her car that was parked out front. Jess hoped that there wouldn’t be a crowd outside watching the comings and goings at the hospital. She didn’t know how Nick will be getting himself into a car.

“I parked the Cherokee out front.” Jess told Nick as they got off the elevator and walked through the lobby.

So far so good. Jess was thinking to herself. She was silently praying that things would go okay.

The warm Florida air felt good on his face. Nick took a deep breath in. The fresh air felt like nothing he had ever experienced before in his life. He never thought he would appreciate it, but after weeks of breathing the stale hospital air, this was like a new awakening. He wheeled the chair over to Jess’s vehicle and quickly surveyed the situation. It was higher than what he was used to moving himself in and out of. The hospital model was a bit lower. Nick knew that he would have to really use his upper body to successfully get in.

Jess scanned the area and was upset to see a flock of photographers standing on the lawn. One of them had seen Nick and was using a telephoto lense and was taking pictures already. She hoped that Nick didn’t see the guy.

“Okay, I’m gonna try this.” Nick said quietly. His desperation to leave was overcoming his fear of falling flat on his back.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Jess offered.

“NO.” Nick snapped back at her.

Jess took a step back but was still behind Nick as if she would be able to protect him from hurting himself. She watched as Nick successfully pulled himself out of the chair and slid into the passenger seat. As he was adjusting himself and buckeling in, she folded his chair and put it into the backseat.

Nick could feel the sweat on his forehead. He was happy that he accomplished his mission on getting into the car without looking foolish. As he turned to watch Jess get into the car, he noticed the paparazzi on the front lawn.

“Damn them bastards. Why can’t they leave me alone?” Nick said outloud. “Jess, will you be able to outrun these jerks?”

“I dunno, I will give it my best shot, Nick.” Jess sighed.

As she sped away, she looked in the rearview mirror to see if any cars had followed them out of the parking lot. She was relieved to see that it appeared that they were alone as far as fans go.

Nick settled back into his seat and looked out the window as Jess steered the car onto the highway. For the first time in weeks, Nick felt free. He was anxious to be released from the hospital permanently. He was tired of tests, theraphy, drugs, the whole thing. He stopped taking his prozac this morning because he was feeling better. Nick didn’t like taking stuff and this pill seemed to him to be something that clouded his thoughts. He didn’t want to take a pill that would make him happy.

“I bet cha you’re hungry for McDonald’s, am I right?” Jess was trying to think of stuff that Nick would like to do.

“God, that does sound good.” Nick replied.

Jess took the next exit that showed a billboard of McDonald’s. She knew that was something she could get without having to leave the car. As they pulled into the parking lot, she asked Nick what he wanted.

“My usual. I would eat the paper right now, this is gonna be better than that crap I get at the hospital.” Nick said.

A cheerful voice greeted Jess as she stopped at the speaker to order. Nick liked going to McDonald’s when Jess was driving. He liked going to McDonald’s when he was driving. No one ever suspects Nick Carter ordering food at a drive thru.

“Do you wanna eat in the parking lot?” Jess asked.

“Hey, anything is fine with me.” Nick replied.

“What do you want to do after we eat?” Jess asked.

“Do you have your cell phone on ya?” Nick asked.

“Yes, why, do you want to use it?” Jess asked Nick as she handed the girl in the drive thru the money for their order.

Nick nodded. Jess handed the drinks one at a time to Nick and then the bag with the food. After she pulled into a parking spot in the shade, she pulled the cell phone out of her purse.

Nick took the phone and placed it on the dashboard. “I’ll make a call after we’re done eating.”

As they were eating, Jess noticed that Nick kept rubbing his left thigh.

“Is something bothering you?” she asked.

“No, I’m okay, why?” Nick replied.

Jess decided to drop it. “Nothing, I guess I’m not use to seeing you verticle.” Jess tried to make a small joke with Nick. He looked out the corner of his eye at her.

Nick laughed and then stopped laughing abruptly. That was their way of saying to each other “funny, not.”

For a second, Jess thought that they had been discovered by some fans. She saw a car full of teens park a car and get out. One of the girls looked over at the car and pointed discreetly. Jess heard the other girl say no way and they walked into the restaurant.

“Wow, that was a close one. I guess no one would expect you to be out and about right now. Must be MTV hasn’t gotten wind of this.” Jess sighed. She glanced over at Nick and saw that he was rubbing his leg again. “Nick, what is wrong?”

“Huh?”

“Nickolas Carter, I know you better than that, something is wrong.” Jess demanded an answer from him.

“I’m feeling something like pin pricks in this thigh. It’s real dull, but it’s there and it doesn’t really hurt or anything, it just bugs me.” Nick replied quietly.

“How long has this been going on?” Jess asked.

“A day or so. It’s been on and off, nothing constant. It just gets annoying that’s all.” Nick looked out the window as he spoke. He reached for the cell phone and started dialing.
“Hey, how ya doin? I was wondering if me and Jess could come up and see you. No, I’m out for a few hours. McDonald’s. Yeah. Okay, just a sec.” Nick handed the phone over to Jess. “Talk.”

“Hello?” Jess wasn’t sure who Nick had called.

“Hey.” the voice had a slight southern drawl.

“Brian?” Jess asked.

“How are things going?” Brian asked Jess.

“Okay. So what am I doing?” Jess asked Brian while she looked at Nick.

“I guess you’re coming over to my place.” Brian replied.

“Nick, you know you will have to go back to the hospital soon.” Jess said.

“Screw that, I’m out, I don’t ever want to go back.” Nick replied.

“Maybe it would be a good idea to come over. We’ll see you in a few.” Jess closed the cover on the cell phone and put it back on the dashboard. She was thinking to herself that if Nick gave her any problems about going back Brian would be there to back her up. Maybe Kev or Howie would be there too.

The drive over to the apartment took over twenty minutes. They hit every possible light on the street. As Jess pulled into a parking space, she looked at the steps leading to the front door of the condo that Brian lived in. Nick was looking at the steps at the same time.

“I guess we forgot about those.” Jess said quietly.

“There’s gotta be any easy way to do this.” Nick tried to figure a plan out.

“Nick, I’m gonna have to call Brian and ask for help. We will have to take you in backwards up the steps and I can’t do that very well, I’m sure of that.” Jess apologized.

Brian and Kevin came out the door after Jess called. Kevin walked up to Nick’s side of the car.

“Hey, glad to see you out and about, buddy.” Kevin smiled as he patted Nick on the shoulder.

Jess got out of the car and walked around to get Nick’s chair out of the backseat. Kevin reached in and pulled the chair out of the backseat before Jess could. He opened it and then Jess took it and positioned it for Nick by the side of the car. No one said anything as they watched Nick scooch himself from the car to the wheelchair. Everyone looked uncomfortable about it.

Kevin took ahold of the handles on the wheelchair once Nick got to the first step. He turned it so Nick was facing backwards and started pulling him up the six steps. Once they got inside the condo, there was another five carpeted steps Kevin had to pull him up.

Nick felt a little embarrassed about having to be helped. No one said a word while this was going on. They all felt the pain that Nick had to be feeling deep inside.

“Nick, we just made some pizza, do you guys want a slice?” Brian asked.

“Oh, no thanks, we just ate.” Jess replied.

“I’ll take one.” Nick said.

Jess looked at him. “You just ate a quarter pounder, supersize fries and a supersize coke and you’re still hungry?”

“Yes.” Nick smiled. Eating was one of his favorite hobbies. Nick always had a ravenous appetite. Jess was hoping that he would learn to curb it since he wouldn’t be as active as he was, but for right now it was good to see him eat since he had lost about twenty pounds since the accident.

“Jess, you want some coke or ice tea or something?” Kevin asked as he gave Nick his slice of pizza.

“Anything is fine.” Jess answered.

Kevin looked at her and raised his eyebrows. He looked at her and waited for another answer.

“Whatever you are getting yourself will be okay with me.” Jess answered again.

“Okay.” Kevin said with a smile and returned with a beer.

“I guess I should rephrase that. I’ll have a soda.” Jess said.

Kevin again looked at her and raised his eyebrows. He waited for another answer.

“Just get me any damn pop, dammit.” Jess laughed.

The guys laughed. Jess was always an easy target to tease. As they visited for about an hour, Jess noticed that Nick was rubbing his leg even more than before. He was doing it slowly and appeared to be trying to hide doing it.

As Nick and Jess were getting ready to leave, Jess looked over at Nick and into his eyes. They looked teary to her. His face looked like he was in pain.

“Nicky, are you okay?” Brian noticed Nick was having problems at the same time Jess was.

“No.” Nick’s answer was barely audible.

“What’s wrong?” Jess asked. “Is it your leg again?”

Nick nodded. He hurt so much he didn’t want to speak.

“We’ll try to get you back to the hospital as soon as I can.” Jess was worried.

“How about I take you guys back, you can leave your car here and one of us will take it to your house or something later.” Kevin offered.

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” Brian agreed. “I’ll go along too.”

“Let’s go down to the garage then.” Kevin said as he pushed Nick through the kitchen over to the stairs that would take them to the garage.

The ride down the stairs to the garage made Nick a little nervous. Instead of being pulled backwards up the stairs, they were pushing him one step at a time forward and Nick almost felt like he could fall out of the chair. He was in a lot of pain so that didn’t help his disposition either.

Kevin’s car was a large luxury car. It reminded Jess of something that someone would drive in a funeral procession. Kev also had a truck. He was the oldest in the group and probably looked more at practicality rather than good looks and attention grabbers like Nick’s Prowler.

The drive back to the hospital seemed to go slow to Nick. He was breathing shallow and hard. Jess could tell he was in a lot of pain. His face was flushed and sweaty. Finally, Nick couldn’t stand the pain anymore, he let out a scream that was almost blood curdling.

Jess could see the worry in Kevin’s face as he stomped on the gas to get the car going faster. Brian and Jess were sitting in the backseat.

Brian took Jessica’s hand to try to calm her down. As they approached the hospital, Kevin said,”Where do we go? Which way?”

He was upset and he talked loud and fast.

“Calm down, just pull up to the front.” Brian was calmer. Nick was quiet and kept gulping air and moaning.

Kevin stopped the car in front of the hospital. Jess and Brian flew out of the backseat as Kevin popped the trunk open. Brian grabbed the wheelchair and pulled it hastily over to the passenger door. Kevin flung the door open and Brian grabbed Nick under the arms and slid him to the chair. He hastily put Nick’s feet on the stands and then he pushed the chair into the hospital. Kevin didn’t follow Jess and Brian. He was going to go park the car, but changed his mind and slipped off his ignition key and gave it to the valet parking boy and quickly got his receipt.

Kevin ran in and caught the elevator before the doors closed.

“Brian, you take Nick to his room and I’ll stop at the nurses station and let them know that something is wrong.” Jess tried to take a handle on the situation.

Nick was grabbing his legs and moaning. No one knew what was wrong and what Nick was feeling. Nick wasn’t talking to anyone. His eyes were closed and he was rocking his body back in forth.

As they got into Nick’s room, a nurse rushed in right behind them. She didn’t waste anytime putting a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s right arm and starting the machine.

“Nick, where does it hurt?” The nurse asked.

“My legs,OH GOD.” Nick yelled when the pain sharply rose again.

“Can you describe it?” the nurse questioned again.

Nick had his eyes closed and his head was tilted back. First he shook his head no. “It just goddamn hurts. Knife stabbing, hot. It just hurts. Awwwwwww.”

Kev, Brian and Jess looked at each other. Was this something good or was this a bad thing. How long would this last?

The nurse left the room.

“Nick, do you want to lay down? Maybe if you stretch out it may help your legs.” Kevin offered.

Nick nodded. It sounded like a good idea, he was willing to try to do anything to take the pain away.

Kevin pushed the chair over to the bed. “Let me move you.”

Nick normally didn’t want anyone to touch him, he wanted to be independent, but was glad that Kevin offered to put him into the bed. It hurt so much that he didn’t think he would be able to move himself.

Kevin picked his friend up under the arms and placed him into the bed. Nick moaned while he was being moved.

The nurse came back into the room with an IV pole and a syringe.

“Oh god, not another IV.” Nick cried out.

“I’m not hooking you up to it yet, Dr. Gaynor told me to wait until he checks you out. I do have some morph for the pain,” the nurse said as she lowered Nick’s waistband on his blue jeans. She exposed his hip and swabbed it with rubbing alcohol. Nick flinched as she injected the morphine into his body.

Suddenly, Nick felt warm. The pain was slowly going away. He also felt very, very sleepy. He tried to fight the sleepiness but finally drifted off.

“There, that should help him rest,” the nurse stated as she saw Nick go to sleep. Without skipping a beat, she picked up his left hand and strapped a band on his upper arm and looked for a vein on the top of his hand. She prepped it and started up an IV.

“I thought you told Nick you were waiting for Dr. Gaynor before you did another IV?” Jess asked her.

“Yes, I did, but that was only because I knew that the patient would be out once he got the morphine and I could tell he was agitated about the IV and distressed and I decided to wait until he was out before I set this up. It would be so much easier and I knew he would be resistant.”

“What is he getting?” Jess asked.

“Dr. Gaynor wanted him to get more steroid for his spine. The pain was an indicator that the nerves are starting to respond again and IV steroids work more quickly than when they’re injected.

“So you’re saying that there is still a chance that Nick could walk again?” Brian was excited.

“Can’t say, but things are looking better today than what they did yesterday.” The nurse responded as she was leaving the room.

Brian and Jess hugged. They both felt as if their prayers had been answered. Jess hugged Kevin. “I hope that this pain is temporary and that Nick will be able to use his legs again. I can’t bear to see him in agony. It hurts me to see him this way.” Jess said outloud.