Jello5418 (3:22:06 AM): I think that I'm going to come "home" soon....and you are the only one online.....I think that I'm
depressed too....which sucks.....but give me time.....and I think that I will realize the good that is in whatever I'm feeling
now....and it will be good......a lot really does suck though... and there is no one to tell.... but maybe when I go to church
tomorrow, I'll have that someone.....my thoughts now are what good will they do, even though I had previous thoughts of how
much they could help....but what negativity is telling me this...I think that I know....and it is not good...do I hate it,yes...wow, I
found something...but is it wrong to hate,is it wrong to hate what is evil...I don't thinkso..this is the only thing that I will hate..but
this brings up many questions..are you thinking should I hate people then...
Auto response from FlipZero (3:22:06 AM): i'm in columbus. gimme a call if there's shizzat to do (8-8947).. or call kathleen's, you should know that
Jello5418 (3:34:19 AM): I won't, hopefully whatever is so tragic that I'm going through will inspire me even more to have others
happy...Between a cup and an umbrella, which would you rather be....I'd rather be a cup....for rainy days...they hold
sorrow....umbrellas don't...they keep the holder happy....but you sit and watch others w/o umbrellas sit..in rain,sad rain....but I
have my cup which holds sorrow...but so insignificantly when you think about how little you are actually contributing to others
not getting wet....so is any of this actually worth the effort, worth choosing..worth living for....why not just worry about
myself....because what good am I dry & healthy, but sad for others...and how bad am I happy, but caring....I wish there was
just an easier way with everything...but...ya' know...I sure don't...but fingers are getting fatigued, and somehow I feel a little
better.Maybe its just b/c the brain is moving again and when I get time to myself I tend to get like this.I don't think that I really
assessed anything, but atleast I got my quality
thought time in for today...disregard everything I said, its just babble. - But remember this tomorrow, "you are good!" and
"Good job on that!" - just listening or whatever actuallt seemingly helped me out, so "wow!" "Have fun!"
Jello5418 signed off at 3:39:42 AM.
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Jello5418 signed off at 7:44:44 AM.