~ A Week Later ~
“Dad, when’s mama gonna come see me. Did she leave again?” Josh asked Justin as Justin was tucking him into bed.
“Of course she didn’t. I don’t know when she’s coming back though.”
“Is she mad at me? Did I do something wrong?”
“No. You didn’t do anything. How ‘bout I call her and find out?”
“Yeah.”
“Ok. I’ll do that tomorrow. But you go to sleep right now, alright?”
“Ok. Night, dad.”
“Night.”
After he put Josh to bed, Justin went to his own room and immediately picked up the phone. Dialing the familiar number, he waited for someone to pick up.
“Hello?” Alexia answered the phone.
“Hey, I need to…” he was cut off by a click, followed by a beeping sound, signifying that she’d hung up. He tried again.
“Hello?” JC answered this time.
“JC. Can I please talk to Alexia?” Justin asked.
“Didn’t she just hang up on you?”
“Yes, but…”
“Well, I think that means she doesn’t want to talk to you. So don’t call for her again. She’ll call you when she wants to talk to you, but I wouldn’t be waiting for the call, because it’s not likely to happen anytime soon.”
“JC, I really need to talk to her.”
“Why? Didn’t you say enough the last time you two spoke?”
“This isn’t about me, it’s about Josh.”
“I’m sure.”
“I’m being serious. When I tucked him in tonight, he asked when she was coming to see him again. It’s been a week since he’s seen her, and he’s been asking for her the past few days. I know that she doesn’t want to see me, but she can’t punish Josh for my mistake. Please can you put her on the phone? I need to talk to her about this.”
“She’s already gone to bed, Justin. And I really don’t think she’d want to talk to you anyway.”
“Well, then will you please talk to her about this. She needs to see him. Do you know what he asked me tonight?”
“What?”
“He asked me if she’d left again.”
“Wow.”
“Please talk to her for me, C.”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
“Thank you.”
“Bye, Justin.”
“Bye.”
~ The Next Day ~
** Ring Ring **
Justin answered the phone, “Hello?”
“Listen, because I’m gonna say this once and only once. As of right now, I’m going to come over to see Josh three days a week. I will call very briefly on Sundays to let you know what days I will see him. When I pick him up, I will honk my horn, and you can send him out to me. I will NOT come to the door, because I DO NOT want to see you. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Ok. I will be there tomorrow, Friday, and Saturday to get him.”
“Ok.”
She hung up without even a goodbye.
Alexia stayed true to her word, keeping her schedule for three weeks. That was until a kink was suddenly thrown into her as-of-yet-flawless plan.
Alexia pulled up into the driveway, stopping next to Justin’s car. She honked the horn, as she’d been doing for three weeks. After waiting five minutes for Josh to run out the door, she honked the horn again. Another five minutes passed and he still didn’t come out of the house.
“Dammit, Justin. What are you up to now?” she cursed to herself, contemplating whether or not she should go to the door and risk facing him.
Wow, doesn’t this scenario seem familiar? Finally, she unbuckled her seatbelt and climbed out of the car, swearing under her breath the whole time, she made her way to front door.
She rang the bell, and the door was immediately opened for her. Alexia was face to face with him, after having not seen him for three weeks, and she was not prepared for the site. His pleading, yet beautiful, blue eyes pierced her own, and she was forced to look away.
“Where’s Josh?” she demanded curtly, without even a hello.
“He’s not here,” Justin answered her rude tone with a calm voice.
This statement caused her to look him in the eye again, anger overtaking her senses. “What do you mean, he’s not here?!”
“It’s his friend’s birthday, and he’s spending the night at his house. I didn’t have the heart to say no to him. He left already. ”
“You knew I was supposed to have him today! I can’t believe you! I asked for three days a week. THREE! And you can’t even give me that!”
“I didn’t do it to upset you, Alex. You didn’t see the way he was looking at me. He really wanted to go. I did it to prevent upsetting him.”
“Fine. I’ll talk to you on Sunday then,” she turned and began to walk down the porch steps, mumbling aggravatedly under her breath.
“Wait, Alex!” he called before she could go any farther.
She spun on her heel to face him, obviously irritated, “What?”
“I have something that belongs to you.”
“What is it?”
“If you come inside, I’ll run upstairs and get it.”
“Alright. But make it quick,” she followed him into the house, closing the door behind her.
“Just go into the living room, and I’ll be right back,” he started up the stairs.
She did as she was told. Sitting down in the loveseat while she waited for Justin to return. She heard him thundering down the stairs before she saw him turn the corner into the room, empty-handed.
“I can’t remember what I did with it,” he lied.
“Probably burned it, whatever it was,” Alexia quipped as she stood to leave.
Justin had to think quick to stop her from going. “Josh knew that you were supposed to take him today.”
“And?” she asked after he didn’t continue. “Was that supposed to make me feel better?”
“He really was sorry. It’s just… you know how kids are. They want to be with their friends more as they get older.”
“Sure, whatever,” she moved away from the chair.
“He’s been telling me how much fun he’s been having with you every time you bring him home. He goes on and on for hours about everything you did with him that day.”
“That’s nice.”
“I’m really glad you’re still spending time with him. He needs you. I don’t know what he would do if you left again,” he pushed a more touchy subject on her, hoping for a reaction.
“Glad he’s happy,” she attempted to get farther out of the room.
Justin finally exploded, “What’s wrong with you? You never used to be this withdrawn! What the hell happened? Tell me what’s going on in your head. Talk to me, yell at me, cry, just do SOMETHING!”
“What’s wrong with me? There’s nothing wrong with me. I finally saw things clearly, that’s all. If there’s anyone who has something wrong with them, it’s you. You drop the act now, Justin.”
“Act? What act? I’m just trying to be nice…”
“Why? Are your whores getting too expensive? Do you want your free ho back?” she spat bitterly.
“Lexi, you know I didn’t mean that.”
“Don’t call me that! You lost that privilege a LONG time ago.”
“Fine. But I swear I didn’t mean what I said.”
“Why don’t I believe you Justin? Maybe it’s because every time you say that, you throw purposeful insults at me right after it. Maybe it’s because every time you say that, I come back and get hurt again. Maybe it’s because this time nothing’s going to make me care, because I gave up on loving you.”
“Loving me? You loved me?”
“Doesn’t make any difference now.”
“Maybe it would make difference.”
“I don’t care if it would make a difference, Justin. I told you; I stopped caring when you did. Goodbye. And have Josh call me when he gets home.”
The door shut behind her. “But I didn’t stop caring,” he murmured.
~ Two Days Later ~
“Alex!” JC called as he made his way up the stairs.
“What?” she called back from her room.
He walked through the door and dropped an envelope on the dresser in front of her. “You have mail,” he said before walking out of her room.
She picked up the envelope and turned it over slowly. Justin’s handwriting, she thought when she saw her name scrawled across the paper. She tossed it on her nightstand. “Well, Justin, I really don’t want to hear what you have to say.” She glanced back at the letter one more time before leaving the room.
~ Later ~
Alexia was settling down into her bed after taking a long bubble bath. She’d had a long day of apartment shopping, and all she wanted to do was go to sleep. She turned over to turn the lamp off, and saw the letter sitting at the base of the lamp.
She stared at it for a moment, then turned the light out and laid down.
Five minutes later, she flicked the light back on, her curiosity getting the better of her. She opened the envelope and pulled the letter out slowly. An object fell from inside the letter, landing in her lap. Picking it up, she saw that it was a ring, an engagement ring, the same ring she’d seem him holding in his room when she’d first arrived.
The ring was simple, but it was the most beautiful ring she’d ever seen. She didn’t know if it was the cut, the clarity, or maybe the man it came from, but it was the most gorgeous ring she’d seen in her lifetime. She was setting it down on the nightstand when something inscribed inside the ring caught her attention. As she read the short inscription, tears pooled in her eyes. Forever, Lexi
Putting the ring down, she picked up the letter and unfolded it.
Lexi,
I know you said I had lost the right to call you that, but that’s what you’ll always be to me; my babydoll, my Lexi.
The other day, when you came to my house, I told you that I had something that belonged to you. Well this ring was it. I told you that I couldn’t find it. But that was a lie, because I knew right where it was the whole time. The same place it’s been for the past five and a half years. It’s been sitting in my dresser drawer since three days before you decided that you no longer wanted to be with me. I’m giving it to you now because that’s the only way I can truly let you go. You need to know the truth about everything, what was going on inside my head during the time before you broke up with me, after you left, and when you came back. I need for you to know, or I’ll never fully get over all of this.
First and foremost, I want to apologize for the way I’ve acted since you came back. I’ve been an asshole, going from hot to cold all the time, and I realize this. Too late, but I realized it none the less. And I’ll explain all that later.
The night you told me you were leaving me, almost six years ago, I can still remember it vividly. I had come home late, and that started us fighting right away; then it only got worse from there. The real reason I was late was because I’d been working details out with Johnny to have the next week off. I had planned on kidnapping you for a week-long vacation at a secluded ski resort. That’s where the ring comes into the picture. I’d purchased it three days before, planning to propose to you during the vacation. I knew I’d made you wait too long for that ring; and after you left, that was the biggest “What if…” that constantly ran through my head. What if she’d just waited one more week? But it didn’t matter, because nothing changed the fact that you were gone, no matter how much I wanted it not to be true.
I’m sure the question running through you’re mind right now though is, “Well why do you still have it? Why did you keep it all this time?” For the first two years or so, I guess it was because I thought you were just going through a phase, and that’d you’d come back and we could pick up where we left off. Obviously, that didn’t happen. After that, I kept it as a reminder, so that I wouldn’t get too close to you again, if you ever DID come back. Which would explain why I acted like the asshole that I did. But we’ll come back to that issue.
I’ll admit this to you now, I didn’t date a single woman between the time you left and the time you came back. Had no desire to. Not because I was afraid they’d hurt me like you did, but because I knew that I would never find another woman that would be as perfect for me as you were. I never kissed anyone either, because I knew it would lack the spark that was in YOUR kiss. I never wanted anyone else, because I only wanted you, and I couldn’t see past that image of you long enough to develop an interest in anyone else.
Then you came back. After two years, I’d given up on that ever happening. But then I open my door one day, and you’re standing there, right in front of me. At first I thought I was dreaming, then I remembered the pain all that I’d suffered, and I wanted you to hurt too. No matter how much I wanted to hate you though, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Because I’d never stopped loving you in the first place. I must’ve seemed bipolar the way I kept changing moods around you. I’m sorry. I couldn’t control my emotions around you, and the war that was raging inside me between my heart and my memories didn’t make it any easier. That’s no excuse, but it’s the only explanation I can offer. Then came the jealousy. JC knew that I still loved you and wanted to be with you, because I’d told him that numerous times. And nothing hurt me more than seeing the two of you getting close. New Year’s Eve was when it became too much. I wanted you to feel what I was feeling when I saw you with JC. That’s why I brought that girl back to the hotel with me. This probably isn’t helping my case any, but first let me explain what happened. Nothing. Nothing happened that night between her and me. She came back to my room with me, and she tried to get me to sleep with her, but I kicked her out as quick as she’d gotten there. It was wrong, and I’m so sorry I acted that way. Then there was the day that I punched the glass door. I was just so angry, and I couldn’t stand the thought of you with someone else, especially my best friend. It was an impulsive reaction.
And that brings us to our recent encounters. I never meant to hurt you by saying the things that I did. Like I said before, I have trouble controlling myself around you, and the jealousy just overtook me. Again, that’s no excuse, but I’m being honest. I didn’t mean any of the horrible things I said.
I wasn’t the only one that was wrong though. You said that I stopped caring about you, but you couldn’t be further from the truth. Because I care about you so much that it hurts, which is why I acted the way I did. But I was so afraid of getting close to you again that I tried to keep my distance. In the end, all I managed to accomplish was pushing you completely out of my life; and for good this time, it seems.
I love you, and I always will. No one could ever replace you, in my heart and in Josh’s. I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this, but I’m glad you came back. You’re just what Josh needed. You’re what I need too, but I’ve ruined that, and I’ll have to live with it. If I could do everything over again, I would do it all different; everything except love you and Josh more than anything in the world. You deserve more than what I’ve given you, and I hope you find it.
Like I said before, I had to write this letter to you so you would know the truth about everything. And I gave you the ring so that I could move on with my life the way you’re moving on with yours.
I'll love you always,
Justin
~ At Justin’s House ~
Justin had just gotten out of the shower. He’d put Josh to bed two hours ago, and was ready for bed himself, as it was nearly 11 o’ clock. Just as Justin was climbing into bed, he heard the doorbell ring.
“Who the hell could that be?” he thought out loud, rushing down the stairs so they wouldn’t ring the bell again and wake Josh up.
He opened the door, and found the love of his life standing on his doorstep. Unsure of what she was doing there, he waited for her to say something.
She took his hand in hers, lifted it, and turned it over. Justin watched as the infamous ring fell back into his own hand. She then closed his fingers around it.
Justin stared at his closed hand, then looked up at Alexia.
The heartbroken look in his eyes as they stared back at her nearly made her legs give out on her. She surprised him by leaning forward and kissing him softly. He kissed back with as much love as he had inside him, afraid that this was her goodbye. He could taste her fresh tears on their lips as they fell from her eyes.
Alexia pulled back slightly, then whispered “I don’t want to move on with my life.”
“I don’t want you to move on either, Lexi. I want you right here, with me, forever.” Justin kneeled on one knee in front of her. “Lexi, I love you more and more everyday, and I never want to lose you again. When you came back, I was given a second chance, but I blew it. Well, I’m not blowing this one. Please let me love you as my wife. Marry me?”
Speechless, Alexia nodded with tears still rolling gently down her cheeks. He slipped the ring on her finger and stood up. She kissed him again, this time with a renewed sense of passion. He deepened the contact with his tongue, picking her up in his arms and carrying her upstairs.
Walking through the doorway to his bedroom he whispered in her ear, “Good thing Josh is asleep already,” and grinned before kicking the door shut.