It was a fall and a reasonably chilly night for some odd reason. The Backstreet Boys were off in the distance filming. I had decided to leave the house, and Nick was coming out of the door. We both had comforters around us to keep us warm. He was wearing a white tank top and shorts and was barefoot. We both walked down the stairs together and were talking. He came down the stairs sideways, so I could see his feet.
"It's hard going down the stairs like that isn’t it?"
" Yeah."
We continued to walk towards where they were stationed and we talked along the way. But before we got there, there was a big noise and people were screaming. We both looked at each other and started to run over there.
Brian was on the floor and unconscious.
"Brian!" I screamed
I ran over there and checked him out and started CPR. Kevin was nearby and he had this serious worried look on his face. He looked like he might cry. I looked up and Nick was down there on the other side telling Brian to wake up and he and a dead, serious, petrified look on his face with tears starting to form in his eyes, and not 10 minutes before, he was happy and laughing.
Breathe Brian, breathe"
I tried my hardest for a long time and finally I did get him breathing again. I could do no more for him and the ambulance was finally arriving. We got him in and loaded up. I looked around and noticed that Nick had gotten up in a grieving rage while I was doing CPR and had walked off. I told Kevin that he would be ok and he was in good hands and to go on to the hospital and I would find Nick and meet him there with the other guys.
I started to look everywhere. Finally, I found him at the lake dock. He had dropped his comforter a distance back. I picked it up and brought it with me. He was standing there throwing rocks in with a great amount of force. I gently called his name but he continued on throwing rocks. I moved and gently touched his arm.
" You know that it wasn’t your fault. It was just an accident."
" I should have been there, if I only didn't take a break, thinking only of myself."
Again I told him that it was not that and it was not his fault. He was so convinced that this whole thing was his fault since he was not there for his best friend. All I could do was calm him down, comfort, and listen to him.
A little later I broke in and told him that we should go to the hospital and that I told Kevin that we would meet him there. He didn't want to go at first but I convinced him that we needed to. On the way to the car, he thanked me for being so nice and caring and helping him through this.
" I will be here if you or the guys need me."
He turned and half smiled at me... The car ride there was mostly spent in silence. When we got there, they were doing surgery on him. I stayed there with them all night. I stayed awake watching and waiting to hear about Brian. I let the boys sleep; they needed it. Brian was ok the first night. Well, the next night he took a bad turn and everyone was upset.