Being In The Band

Being In The Band
By Sarah
Chapter 17

        "What a girl wants, what a girl needs, whatever makes me happy and sets you free.  What a girl wants, what a girl needs, whatever keeps me in your arms."  Lizard sang along with the song that was playing from the store as she passed on her way into the hotel.  She hummed the rest of the song as she walked to the elevator and pressed her floor, riding up.  She walked down the hall to her room and opened it, closing it behind her as she walked in.  She put away a pint of her ice cream and a candy bar before sitting down on her bed and pressing play on the VCR.  She sighed, opening the first pint of ice cream and spooning out a little.  She smiled as the little girl on the screen came in sight of her father, covered in mud.  A few minutes later, she was reaching for the tissues, sniffling before the next scene started.
        Lizard was really getting into the movie, and she barely noticed when someone knocked on her door.
        "I'm coming," she called when she finally heard it.  She paused the movie and set her ice cream aside before walking to the door.
        "Lizard, can I use the phone?"
        Lizard flinched, Nick was standing in front of her, shirtless, his face bright red.  "Yeah, but no one’s here, they all went out," she said, ushering him in.
        "They left?  Dammit!"  He exclaimed, walking in and throwing his gym bag on the floor.  Lizard jumped before closing the door.
        "Yeah, they left a good hour ago," she said, gesturing to the clock.
        Nick sighed.  "You know, you’d think it might kill them if they bothered telling me these kind of things," he said, running his hands through his wet hair.  "I was in the gym all day, they told me nothing," he explained as she looked warily at the towel draped over his shoulder.
        "Oh," Lizard said, going back over to her bed and picking up her ice cream.
        "Which movie are you watching?"  Nick asked as she reached for the controller.
        "Ever After," Lizard answered, not looking at him.  She pressed play and turned her attention to the movie as Drew Barrymore swam in the lake.
        "Oh," Nick said as he sat down behind her.  Lizard tried to ignore his presence, eating her ice cream slowly.  It was about half-gone when she lost her appetite for it.
        "Here, you want this?"  She asked Nick, holding out the pint container.
        "Thanks," Nick said, smiling.  He took it out of her hands, his fingers brushing hers.  Lizard quickly pulled her hand away and stood up, getting the two Butterfinger bars from the fridgerator and tossing one to Nick, then sitting in front of the bed, as far away from Nick as she could manage without being too obvious.
        It was at the part where Danielle was taken away from her home when Lizard noticed that Nick was sitting right behind her head, gently playing with her hair.  She didn’t object, rather let her head lean against the end of the bed.  She closed her eyes slowly as his hands moved from her hair to her shoulders, massaging them gently.  She relaxed her body and before she knew it, Nick was sitting between her and the bed, massaging her lower back.
        "Nick, I-"
        "Shh," Nick whispered, turning her face towards his and lying a finger on her lips.  Lizard looked in his eyes moments before their lips met.
        And then it happened.
        "Wait, I-I-I can’t do this," Lizard said, breaking away from him.  She hated doing it, but the reality struck her hard, she couldn’t be doing this, she could get in a lot of trouble for it.
        "Please, Liz, I don’t want to put this off anymore," Nick said quietly, reaching for her chin again to turn to him.
        "No," Lizard said, standing up and walking away from his reach.  "Just leave, Nick, I don’t want to deal with it, nor can I again," she said, pointing to the door.  She felt like running over and sharing another kiss with him, but she knew she couldn’t.
        Nick slowly stood up and walked over to her.  "Liz, please…I’ve waited a long time, I can’t put it off anymore.  I want you so bad that I'm going crazy.  Please, Liz," he said, finally approaching her, backing her against the wall.  "I don’t know when it happened, or where, but I can’t do this without you…I need you," he whispered, leaning down to kiss her.  They met, the softest and sweetest kiss either had ever experienced.  The feeling was there, the place was right…but the timing was off.
        "I-I…I can’t do this," Lizard repeated as she broke away from him, trying to push him away from her.
        "Liz, we can make this work," he said, trying to stay with her.
        Lizard’s eyes filled with tears.  "No, we can’t!"  She exclaimed, finally succeeding in pushing him away, and running to the door.  She ran down the hall and to the elevator, hitting the down button a few times.  It didn’t come fast enough and she heard Nick calling down the hall for her.  She ran away from the elevators and to the stairs, kicking open the door and running down the stairs.  She ran out at the bottom floor, not stopping until she’d reached the park across town.  Once she had gotten there, she sat at a bench and cried.  Cried because her heart was broken, cried because she missed her parents, cried because she was home sick.
        She cried because she fell for Nick and she couldn’t have him.

        Tommy got out of the cab in front of the hotel, followed by the rest of the band and the guys, then walked to the elevators.  As they reached the band floor, the doors opened, and he instantly knew something was wrong.  It was too quiet…something had happened.
        "Nick?"  Tommy said as he passed Lizard’s room.  The door was standing wide open and Nick was sitting on the floor, his knees hugged to his chest, a sad look on his face.
        "She said no, Tommy, she said that she didn’t want to be with me," Nick said quietly, sniffling and holding back tears.
        Tommy cursed under his breath as everyone came up behind him and saw Nick.  Brian fought his way through the small crowd and helped Nick stand up, practically carrying him to the elevators, not saying a word.
        "Dammit, it didn’t work," AJ said, watching as Brian and Nick disappeared inside the elevator to go up to the next floor.
        "No, it didn’t.  And this time, it wasn’t Nick who made that decision, it was Lizard," Tommy said.
        "Why?  She really liked him, a lot, and it would’ve only taken a little push to either of them to hook them up," Mindi said as she walked in the room and surveyed the scene.  "I think they watched another movie together, and ate ice cream and Butterfingers.  God, I swear, those two," she started, shaking her head.
        "Come on, guys, let’s go to bed," Kevin said, clapping his hands on AJ’s and Howie’s shoulders.  AJ nodded and bid everyone a good night before starting for the elevator with his two friends.  He thought about what had possessed Lizard to say no, and he could only think of one thing.
        ‘She’s scared…she’s very scared and she won’t recover unless she faces the fear.  In this case, that would be Nick.’

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