Dreams
I've had recurring themes to my dreams. Suzann and Jim are in my dream, and they have a teenage daughter. Vicki thinks the daughter represents me. She asked me what happened at the age the daughter is that would make me dream that? I realized that at that age I wanted parents like Suzann and Jim-----a stable home life with a Mom and Dad who loved and protected me.

Now I'm losing them.

Vicki said that they could stay with me, inside me, that I just need to visualize them living in a house next door to mine. That helped a lot. I see them living in a cottage with a white picket fence, and their daughter is with them. They're happy, and we can visit any time I want to.

Nightmares
I dreamed the other night that the administration at the college wanted to gang rape me. I had a choice to make: either I could try to run, but they would force me to submit and tear me apart, or I could offer myself up to them without violence as my punishment. Either way, they would have their way with me.

Which do I choose?

June 4 is Coming
I can't stand that June 4th is her last day! Forced to retire after 31 years of loyalty. Why couldn't they have waited until she was ready to retire? It's not my problem. But I can't seem to let go.

Dr. B said to her on Friday, "I didn't realize how much you know" about Datatel and the MIS Reports. Why make decisions to push someone off into the corner before you even know them or what they do?! She's an idiot just like the rest of the Administration. I will never forgive them for what they've done to Suzann and our ESS family. They're horrid, unthinking ninnies.

They keep telling us to be willing to change. I can change probably more easily than a lot of people, but what they want is unreasonable. They come into our campus and decide to make us change, while they themselves are trying to re-create the previous campus where they worked-----because they don't want to change. Does that make sense? Only to the idiots who are making the decisions.