wow...
Now Playing: cryin'-aerosmith
omg...insane, i almost rolled my car over the weekend! i hit a patch of loose gravel going from kindersley to major for the grad party, and we hit the ditch and almost rolled, it was sooo scary! haha not to mention i hit a stop sign earlier that day...but that was cuz i took a corner in third gear cuz i was ognna hit a dead end...and i slid on some mud and hit the stop sign lol...im not having much luck driving lately lol. but yea..what else..went o the randy bachman n burton cummings concert...it was kick ass! but yea...more later...peace

more big changes!
Mood:  down
Now Playing: the tv
Topic: blabbin 4 da hell of it
omg...life is sooo fucking insane lately...k, i suffer from depression...like really badly now, im in counselling and mental health n shit...ummm...my truck is officially a piece of shit lol...it broke down on me n tia on like friday or sumthin like that...and we put a new selanoid in it...n it runs ok now...needs a new starter tho lol..n yea...i completely fucked up with jeremy this weekend n i feel horrible!!! i've never cried sooo hard over a guy....but i cried for like 2 days straight, n yea...if you read this...im sooooo sry!!! newho...im out..peace

big changes!
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: silence hehe
Topic: blabbin 4 da hell of it
wow, big changes...k first of all...dan n i are hanging out again THANK GOD!! (maybe ill stay outta trouble now lol)...theres guys chasing me left n right lately. im an auntie! lol baby bruce, born on saturday may 13! he was 8lbs 7oz when born and 21 inches long....he's soooo cute! annndddddd....HOTEL PARTY WITH RICKY THIS WEEKEND! it's gonna be kick asssssssssss! and yea...im off to the chiropractor...ill hit ya up again laterz...peace

family/friends droppin like flies lately!
Mood:  down
Now Playing: T.V.(dunno what station tho)
Topic: need to vent or blab
well, its official my family and friends are dropping like flies lately...now Wes Selby passed away, my brother and i were really close to his family...wes was like a father to us in a way. its pretty sad, but yea, single still...but for how long lol...so yea i dunno what else is new....umm was at dads for the weekend, that was fun...but yea im out..peace

life smooth again?? ha yea right!
Mood:  flirty
Now Playing: the radio(102.1 fm)
Topic: blabbin 4 da hell of it
well, jessie n i kinda worked things out...i guess. schools not too bad, goin to dads this weekend with jessie. busy busy busy with friends n stuff, its like non-stop. moving to ave. H gonna live in cheryl's basement suite cuz too much shit is goin on in my apartment building. so yea, pretty much just keepin busy. chillin with friends, school, babysitting at 4am! for 3 days this week..it sux! lol...so yea im gonna go, just thought i'd update this thing...peace

Poem
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: silence
Topic: need to vent or blab
Is your heart really mine? I want you to answer me honestly this time.
Please answer this question with truthful words...Will your heart ever be hers?
I'm sick of pretending everythings fine, does your word go as deeply as mine?
Do you even want a kiss or a hug? My heart feels like you shot it with a slug.
Is this what love is supposed to feel like? Like you drove something into my heart...maybe a spike.
You used to say you love and miss me too, now my words don't mean anything to you.
You say that a part of love is trust, are you in love or is it just lust?
I'm tired of all these games that you play, now its your time to hear what I say.
I love YOU with all my heart, but are YOU gonna let it fall apart?

well i wrote that poem tonight, cuz im really upset with jessie. I had friends over on saturday nite, and all weekend me n jessie were arguing back and forth. then last night i thought i straightened things out, and this morning he got all pissed off at me and left, then he came back and everything was fine. so him zack, dakota, alisha, shawn and i were here chillin out, and mom and i had to drop alisha off at home, so i kicked everyone out. when he left i went to kiss and hug him and say "love you" and after i said it he was like "sometimes i wonder about that". since then i've been upset and asking myself questions, and i wrote that poem. im just gonna tell him that, if he wants out just say the words cuz im sick of pretending everythings fine im sick of trying to work things out especially when he's not putting any effort in. so im pretty much gonna ask him if he thinks its really worth working out, or we're just gonna call it quits, because our relationship's hanging by a thread right now, one more cut and its just gonna fall and shatter, just like my heart. i often wonder if im good enough for him, even tho everyone tells me im too good for him. i dunno why i love him so much, i had a bad feeling right from the start, and i still went ahead and trusted him with my heart. but anywho, im gonna do some thinking, just needed to get some stuff out. peace

craziness
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: the radio(102.1 fm)
wow, crazy, im so bored lol...well, sliced my finger open last night after i got home from the east side lol...n yea selling the blue truck, party @ my place sautrday night!!! lol...dads in fort mac, went to dads n hung out with greg while i was there, lotsa fun lol...n yea lotsa drinking goin on lately! im out peace!

bored
Mood:  spacey
Now Playing: the radio(102.1 fm)
Topic: life in the city
well, new stuff, havent updated in a while. same as last time, plus jessie's gotten himself into some trouble with the law, so im helping him out with that. goin to major tomorrow!!!:) tonight jessie and i went to Zack and Dakota's n had "fun" lol, it was great. except eddie ran out:(, o well, fun times anyways....haha dont worry zack we didnt "soil" your bed :P. so yea, its great fun. hope ya all had fun at sarah's party, cuz i had fun at zack, dakota n eddies without you!! lol jk...so yuea, im out...peace

busy!
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: FACK-Eminem
Topic: life in the city
Wow, life is busy lately. Jessie's over everynight, i've got finals starting friday, constantly irritated with Jessie, Jeremy calls everynight (usually 2 times a day), im confused about stuff, Dad, Kelly, Kyle, Amanda and Darren might be moving up to Kindersley, i miss Major, but yet love it here in Saskatoon. people have been pissing me off Started something stupid quite a while ago that i really regret, been sick for 2 weeks straight, I MISS DAN! ( and i know your reading this, but its true, just dont ask questions, im still trying to figure it out, ill let you know when i do), School's the only thing in my life that i have a handle on right now, stuffs happening with mom and yeah, its been crazy, went to kindersley last weekend and got in a fight...and i was only there for 3 hours! i dunno, lifes a huge mess right now. im really stressed about finals tho. so yeah, if you have any questions or comments or advice, plzzz let me know ppl!!! cuz i could really use it right now. but ill end this on a good note, we got a car, anbd once i get my liscense, moms getting another one, and this ones gonna be mine. its an '02 Kia Rio....its NICE!! and 5-speed!! woot! gonna be ridin in style baby! its gonna be PIMPED! lol, alright im outta here, ttyl

life
Mood:  party time!
Now Playing: silence
Topic: at dads visiting
well, im at dads from tuesday till...well tomorrow which is sunday i guess....or today i should say. its new years!! and we were partying till dad crashed out lol. but yea now im awake and ready to party but i cant cuz noones awake. but down at dads has been fun, got drunk, got money for stuff and yea its great, cant wait to go home tomorrow tho, i miss saskatoon and all my friends. dads engaged by the way to kelly, so yeah its ok i guess, she's a lot cooler than char was! but yeah im out, peacee

wow, changes
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: fack-eminem
Topic: life in the city
well, i broke up with dan, and am dating jessie. i know i moved on quick, but i've been wanting to do it for a while now, and i finally did. so yeah, gotta go, more later

been a while!!
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: so far so good- thornley
Topic: life in the city
hey ppl! i know its been a while, but first my keyboard got fried, then i was too busy for a while, then the internet was down for a few days, but its all good now. i wont be updating as much as i would like to for a while now cuz im really busy lately, my buddy jessie is always over at my place and we're always hanging out, so im never on the computer, right now he's at his contract workers place working, so i have the place to myself for a few hours! yaay! so yea, not much is new, schools great, friends are good....oh yeah, my buddy scott was in the hospital cuz he O.D.'s, but he got out and today was his first day at school!!! it was great!! and i dropped 4th period, so if anyone wants to hang out at lunches i have from 12:10-2:15 to chill. and sunday was 10 WHOLE MONTHS for me n dan!!! but yea, im out, peace!

new shit
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: up on cripple creek- the band
Topic: life in the city
well, the fucken pussy wimped out on me today lol...monty was supposed to come beat the shit outta me, but didnt come...damn lol. im getting a bed this weekend! movie night next weekend!!! jess is off grounding next weekend!! lol jess is my lover apparently :P. omg i feel so bad tho. i walked outta the school today at break and jesse saw me and was like "theres the woman of the hour" and stood by me for a bit, then he was like "so what kinda stuff are you into", so i gave him a list of stuff and he was like "thats cool, we're into the same type of stuff then" and i asked him why he wanted to know and he was like "cuz i wanted to ask you out" and i was like "ohhhh.....sorry but i've got a bf....but he he and i break up, you'll be the first person i'll tell". and jesse got upset and walked away without hugging me or saying bye. i feel so bad!! then adam bit me twice yesterday and today told me that he was gonna ask me out too. i cant believe it tho....adam bleached his hair and meant to make it white....but it turned out blonde...like eminem blonde....it looks pretty good, but i couldnt date him cuz he's like a brother to me now...he's a great guy lol. melissa went to meet brandon last night...and she fucked him, so today when she told me i was like "holy fuck, you slut" and i think she's mad at me for it now. but oh well, your first time EVER meeting a guy, and you screw him...wow! lol. anywho, mine n dan's 9 month anniversary is on saturday!!! but yea, im gonna go....peace

new stuff
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Interlude- Kilo
Topic: life in the city
hey ppl! got my lip pierced!! yea thats rite! lol. yea, life's better now. i went to dads, and things werent too bad, almost got into an accident while driving, but its all good. got back, been hanging with lots of friends, mom knows everything about me now, that i smoked, that i have sex...EVERYTHING!! lucas blabbed to her about it, and i was pissed off at him at first, but its all good now i guess. im still kinda mad at him, and am not sure if i can trust him again, but oh well, i feel better now that mom knows. and i didnt even get grounded or anything!! yaay! so yea, thats all thats new, my lip's swollen and hurts, but it'll pass. ttyl ~PeAcE~

well, 9 days into the month and things are better so far...i guess
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: writings on the wall-tea party
Topic: life in the city
well, 9 days into the month and i guess things are better but still arent the best, yesterday we went out to Warman area for thanksgiving dinner and it was pretty fun. got to know the rest of the family and they're good people. made some new friends at church before we went out there. but today krystal, trav, cassie, chris and brandon came into the city to get the rest of trav n krystals stuff out of alvins old apartment, and the landlady wasnt there, and she changed the locks, and since krystals pregnant she's really moody (i really dont wanna get pregnant:P) so her and trav are constantly fighting, then trav takes off with the truck, which i'd imagine he was supposed to take back to mom cuz she has to walk home from work now, in the cold, without a jacket. so maybe ill walk down n meet her there with a jacket for her. then cassie and chris left, and we have no clue where they are now. so krystal and brandon left to go back to warman, and noone knows where chris and cassie are. so yeah, its greeeaaattt! lol. other than that, things arent too bad, goin to dads next weekend, only got 3 days of school this week yaay! and if anyone from stoon reads this and wants to be in a music video....let me know!! im helping alvin with his video and we're lookin for ppl to be in it/help with makeup and stuff. so yeah...im out
*P3A<3*

well beginning a new month....will it be better?
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: the radio(102.1 fm)
Topic: life in the city
well, september was a long and stressful month it ended off with our truck getting broken into, but mom got a job! so things'll get better hopefully. i'm making a lot of decisions about my life and who/what's important...and yeah, things've started looking up lately. so yeah....ill keep ya updated as to what happens throughout the month....oh yeah, im pissed off at ryan cuz i got up this morning and he had sent me messages saying that he loves me and xoxoxo etc. so yeah, gotta talk to char about that....and dad and char broke up. anyways...later ppl!

bad news!
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: cocky-kid rock
Topic: life in the city
wow, bad week last week, in a matter of 5 days, my life changed hugely! first of all monday i was sexually assaulted, then i failed 2 exams last week, then on friday night my friend phillip got jumped and went into the hospital, and he died on sunday from head injuries...so i was pretty upset to hear that.the funeral was today, and it was good, his parents approached me and my teacher and told me that he talked about me a lot at home. so i gave his parents each a big hug and told them to stay in touch with me and that if they ever want to talk or go out for coffee, to call me. yeah, its really hard for me right now cuz it happened right behind my apartment, and his blood is there, so i walk by it at least 3 times a day. but oh well. on a lighter note...talked to bev and major's volleyball team is 7-1 this year....they're actually doing good!:O. im gonna see a lot of bev on the thanksgiving weekend and the day after thanksgiving, because im going to major for the weekend, and she's coming to the city the day after and we're gonna meet for lunch cuz by then i wont have a 4th class, so ill be free from 12:10-2:15 then again from 3:15-10:30, but they'll be going back to major around 4 or 5 probably. but yeah, i think thats it, talk to ya's later...peace

oops, mistake in the last entry
Now Playing: the radio(102.1 fm)
Topic: moved to the city!
oops sry guys, the last entry had a mistake and a few ppl got confused....the bad thing i started was supposed to be in quotations, cuz its a rumor around major, sry for the misunderstanding ppl....i got some pretty wierd comments on it. im out, peace!

forgot about ya again...oopsies
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: little moments-brad paisley
Topic: moved to the city!
well forgot about ya again for a few weeks. so heres whats new and interesting. i was sexually assaulted on monday, lucas is a model, im friends with every group at school!, bevs my only friend left in major, school isnt too bad, might drop guitar 10 in school, started something really bad but i wont say what. and i think thats it...im out, waiting for dan to call or msg so i kno if he's comin over or not. im out...peace

wow, forgot about ya ppl
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: nothin...the traffic on the street i guess
Topic: moved to the city!
well, i started school, its not too bad im taking math 10, math 20, accounting 20, info pro 10, ela a and b 10, wellness 10, guitar 10, science 10, and history 10 this year. yeah school isnt too bad, and i havent gotten lost yet, so its all good. but yeah, goin down to dads this weekend and ill be back monday. not much else is new...trav and krystal are moving in with alvin i guess, and lucas and i hang out a lot. but yeah, thats it, c ya's later! peace!