Saturday 17th January 2003

Week 47, Day 295

Boy, has it been a long time since I last wrote or what? First of all, apologies to those who keep trying to view photos from my aussie trip and find the links don't work. Due to the situation with breaking up with Dave I haven't had the chance to upload them. I now have no computer and his has been a little temperamental so I've had no chance to do it. However, hopefully that will change over the next few months as I am hoping to find a computer of my own - when I get the cash.

So what's been happening in my life? A lot that's what! So here's how it's been going in brief...

28th November - I found myself moving in with three other girls in a MASSIVE house in Gledhow. It's an old mis-matched house but I love it and I had a really good feeling about it when I first walked in and was relieved when the girls said they'd like me to move in. There's Marion who's scottish and works for a food company creating new products. Then there's Susan who's a nurse at the moment but is about to apply to join the police force. And Katie who works in HR in a big factory and is dating Mark who lives in London. My room is absolutely huge. It was originally quite cold because my radiator wasn't working but that's all sorted now. I am hoping to buy a sofa bed to put in there, some entertainment items (tv, stereo, video) and other bits and bobs but that will come with time. It's very close to town, around the corner from the bus stop and it's a nice area, on top of a hill (I always seem to live on them no matter where in the world I am!) and I love it.

1st December - Nando's Christmas party which was held in Manchester. The theme was Cowboys and Cowgirls and we really had the time of our lives. We were all reasonably drunk (some of us horribly so), we managed to win an award, and it's also where I met up with Chris - a fellow assistant manager who I had met previously - and where the sparks began flying between us.

The month of December - Saw me socialising a lot. I went to quite a few parties, drank a lot, spent way too much money on entertainment but had a blast. I also began hanging out with Ana, who is training with us at our restaurant, and we have since become very good friends. I am not looking forward to the day she has to move on to her restaurant in Bradford as it's been nice to have another female figure in management at the restaurant. I also bought a car - Ford Fiesta 1995, maroon, 5-door with sunroof. Haven't named it yet but it's been running well and I got a good bargain.

Christmas - Was weird this year. I'm so used to the big festivities and this time it was just me. I got to work on Christmas Eve to find a big bunch of flowers for me from Chris. That definitely made my day! Christmas Eve was spent getting drunk with Ana, her partner Jayne and a few friends of theirs. It was a good night and after paying a fortune to get home, I sat on my bed and opened my presents. My mother had sent me a few goodies - ugg boots to keep my tootsies warm, a cookie cutter from 'Santa' and a pair of gorgeous cushion cases which I had pointed out to her when I was in Australia. Dave also gave me some great pressies - a mini-stereo with cd & tape deck so that I can tape my cds to listen to in the car, a fan heater which has proved to be brilliant for drying my washing overnight and a nice big mug for having hot chocolates in. Damian sent me two CDs which rocked my world - piano versions of Radiohead songs (makes me feel homesick for my piano) and Jonny Greenwood's solo CD which is music he did for a film called Bodysong. By the end of opening my presents I was in tears. I really did feel homesick. The next day I had invited Beto (he's from Leeds restaurant but is coming over to Castleford to be our Supervisor) for lunch as he also has no family in Leeds. We had lasagne, drank red wine and just talked all afternoon. It was lovely. I later also got a few more pressies from Chris and also one from Les - the late ones are always the best cause it's like Christmas keeps on giving :)

New Years - Nothing outrageous. Spent it at Les and Andy's place. Drunk almost a whole bottle of Midori to myself but wasn't horribly drunk. We did play a drinking game to try and liven things up but it was a tame evening. The best part was when it started to snow! May not have had a white Christmas but my prayers were answered in just seeing it snow at least once. It lasted three days.

Gaynor's Visit - My friend Gaynor from Brisbane came to stay with me and stayed a little over a week. I was a bit bummed I couldn't take her out more due to work but I think she enjoyed herself. The funniest was sending her off on a drinks night with Dave and Amit when she hadn't even met them! Luckily, she enjoyed their company and loved Mojo, where they went for drinks. We went there on Wednesday, her last evening in Leeds, just to give her a proper send off :)

Snowboarding - While Gaynor was here I managed to get us some snowboarding lessons. The ski guys here had been asking when I'd finally get on the slope as I always give them free meals. So, I got on there and was surprised at how much I enjoyed Snowboarding. Am up to Level 3 but imagine I will be at that level for a while as I'm just scared of speeding down the slope. In time I'm sure I'll be a pro!

Chris - After a few weeks of phone conversations, Chris and I decided to give us a shot. He too has recently broken up from a serious relationship though his has been a bit nasty. He is incredibly sweet and makes me laugh and we're not sick of eachother yet so that's promising at least. He's about 6ft 3inches tall, brown hair, blue eyes. As I mentioned previously, he too works at Nando's and has been with the company for 3 years. He's first assistant at his store which just recently opened and as he's just much of a work-a-holic as I am, he's been busting his arse there but enjoying it I believe :) The only problem is that he lives in Coventry, about a 2 hour drive from here. We've managed to see eachother once a week over the past month but I think that works well as I'm trying to get myself into gear. I've lost track of myself lately and it's time to pull my socks up.

Me - Well, as I said, I've let myself go a little. I had this plan to return to the UK after my Aussie visit and really get myself together. You know, start doing all the things I love to do again, get fit and healthy again, call friends more, etc, etc. As life has it though, there were other plans for me. But it is a new year, and I have many new resolutions which I am slowly working on. I think I'm finally building up my confidence again which I lost somewhere along the way and I am beginning to feel a lot happier again. Andy, Les and Ana have been a great support and I don't think I give them enough credit for it sometimes. I've been stuffing up majorly at work but rather than hounding me for it, they've pulled me aside and asked how we can all help to make it better and make me better at my job. I've also realised just how much I've been pushing people away from my life here and that it's time to start letting people in so that I can build my friendships here to the same point as the friendships I have back home.

I admit that I've qutie often asked myself lately what the hell I am doing here. I left behind a bunch of friends that love me, a family that supports me and a life that I was content with to a start a whole new life which I have no idea how will turn out. I never found it scary until now. And it is. I don't know where I'll end up but I decided not to give up on it despite the crap I've been going through because when it comes down to it, I've always wanted to live here since I was a little girl and that's what I'm doing now - living my dream. How corny does that sound? But it is true and I know I can make something of it. When else will I ever get the opportunity to do it again?

I have a lot of things to look forward to now. Nikki has announced she's going to visit me (albeit for only 2 days but something is better than nothing) at the end of Feb, Chris is going to take a few holidays owed to him so I'll get to see him a little more around that time, I've got some new goals to aim for at work which I know are going to be tough but look forward to making it, Amanda is coming over to live so it'll be great to catch up with her, Grace said she might also be paying a quick visit AND I'm going back to Australia in April to see Radiohead AND meet up with old friends while I'm there.

It's all good :)


x
Vanessa