Curiousity Kills the Cat!!

A man travelling by plane was in urgent need of the toilet. But each time he looked up, the illuminated sign proclaimed that it was occupied.

The stewardess, aware of his predicament, suggested that he uses the airplane's new prototype women's loo. But he must not press any of the buttons inside. The were labelled WW,WA,PP, and ATR.

The man's curiousity got the best of him and he started pressing the buttons one by one.

When he pressed WW, Warm, fragrant Water was sprayed all over his entire bottom. He thought, wow, the women really have it made.

Still curious, he pressed the button marked WA, and a gentle breeze of Warm Air quickly dried his hindquarters. He thought this was fantastic and reached for the button marked PP.

This yielded a large Powder Puff that delicately applied a soft talc to his rear. Naturally, he couldn't resist the last button marked ATR.

When he woke up in the hospital, he buzzed for the nurse. "What happened to me? The last thing I remember is that I was in the new ladies' room on a plane."

"Yes," replied the nurse, "apparently you were having a great time until you pressed the ATR button, which stands for AUTOMATIC TAMPON REMOVER. Your penis is under your pillow."

Found at the Joke Center.

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12 Things NOT to Say To a Police Officer

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Gee Son . . . your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Found at the Joke Center.

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Cope With School

Sometimes it can be really tough, especially when you don't want to get out of bed in the morning :/

Always think positively.

Try and stay organised.

Get up earlier than you need to so you don't stress, and sort out your school stuff the night before.

If anyone says anything bitchy, just ignore it. Hard I know, but the most annoying thing is when you say something evil to someone and they totally blank you.

If any serious bullying is going on, tell someone!

Take school a day at a time.

Get into a routine where you come back from school, have a break and then spend some time doing your homework.

If you're seriously finding it difficult to cope, tell someone you trust or who has an idea about the situation.

It's not all bad, some good/funny things happen too, so try and remember those instead of the bad things :)

Found at KuteKitten.

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Fun Links

The Death Clock - Ever wondered when your time will come?
Old Superstitions - The largest list of superstitions on the web
FoldMoney - Amazing tricks with dollar bills
Crazy Thougths - Life's unanswered questions...
Fortune Telling Service - Funny...go and see for yourself

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Who You Were In Your Last Past Life?

To know the answer - just type in the DAY, MONTH, and YEAR you were born in PRESENT life.

For example:
October 16, 1955 would be entered as - Day:16 Month:10 Year:55

Day:    Month:   Year: 

Attention! This esoteric algorythm is composed for our contemporaries - people born after 1922. Earlier birthdates may be processed with errors or not processed at all.

Got this script from here

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Graphics

Graphics I made. If you take one remember to link back to my site. Thank you..

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