Saturday, 11 October 2003 - 5:45 PM BST

"who'd want to be *good* at breaking up with someone?"

You have a good point there. The fact that I seem to have managed it does make me wonder exactly what is going on from time to time.

If you need any tea/music/moan-listener tonight, I'll be in & you know where I am!

Saturday, 11 October 2003 - 11:47 PM BST

Anyone who is 'good at breaking up with someone' would be dead inside, and likely to end up alone. From reading a few posts, you seem to have plenty of emotions and feelings to form proper attachments which, while it means breaking up with someone will be hard, you stand more of a chance of finding the kind of love you need :)

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 1:47 AM BST

Thinking of you (and reading your blog) in these troubled times. Found this.

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 2:24 AM BST

Sorry you hurt. Life really sucks sometimes.

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 12:45 PM BST

"If you and your spouse are owner-occupiers, it is often the case that only one of you is the actual owner. If this is the case, and you are the partner who is not the owner, you will need to ensure that you keep your right to live in the property and to prevent the owner selling it without your knowledge. Even if you actually move out when the relationship ends, you may want to move back in again with the children. To retain your right, you must register our ?right of occupation? by completing a form and sending it to either the District Land Registry or the Land Charges Department in Plymouth, or in Northern Ireland, the Land Registry or the Registry of Deeds, depending on where the title of the property is registered.
This procedure is not complicated and it is not necessary to consult a solicitor."

Cheers. I liked the list of who you have to tell about it. Bank, council, etc. I could see the advert lady saying it in calming tones as I read it...

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 12:55 PM BST

Thanks. Will that offer extend to ten years of me whingeing on about it?

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 12:55 PM BST

Thanks. What a nice thing to say on a stranger's blog!

Sunday, 12 October 2003 - 12:56 PM BST

Ah well. Trying to gain a sense of perspective, I'm not dead, and neither is she. Life goes on.

Monday, 13 October 2003 - 7:51 AM BST

As per usual, I'm late on this.

Sorry to hear that things are so crappy right now for you Van. It will get better, one way or another, but it takes time. I've gone through it myself and found that I was even crapper at it than you seem to be. Blokes aren't meant to be hysterical - it's not in the "How to be a lad" book.

Cheers

Monday, 13 October 2003 - 9:42 PM BST

Cheers, Pete. You're right about time... it's just a matter of gaining some perspective on why it needs to happen, I think.

Sunday, 19 October 2003 - 12:32 AM BST

@#%$! Van, that was a really useful post I added to this thread. I'm sorry - it was about as useful as the 'plenty more fish in the sea' type comment that people pass about when you split up from a partner.

"Time is a great healer" must rank up there with "Don't worry, be happy" as one of the most useless comments that can be made..

My serious advice, far far away from all that type of crap, would be to decide for yourself what you want and to stick to that idea regardless. Don't fart about hoping that things might go back to the way they were - they won't. I spent a year or more arsing about hoping that I could just get back into an ex-GFs life when there was no real hope. I felt released when I got my head around that fact. Just move on and adjust, it's difficult but in the end it'd better for you.

Tomorrow, I'll write a note here to disclaim this opinion and produce an entirely different one...us blokes are allowed do that on the weekend :)