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BLOG*N it up

Raj posted part of my blog (the part about how jimmy would be pissed… and gave some advice and made me feel like an ass, so I felt the need to create a new blog; one to keep to myself, as a personal journal type thing) only those who are privileged can view this…. and here are the things from my deleted blog....

Sunday, July 20, 2003

ok and i think i'm addicted to this thing! oh well... i have some time to kill before headin to the big 'showplace'

*last night, i went out with amanada (boyfriend problems), it was fun, we "rolled" green... hehe... we pissed the mall security off and he's apparently going to turn my license plate number into the "EPD" cuz thats "the authority" that he had... what a loser, he told us that with a real cocky asshole, like i really care, i "aint neva skurd" of the mall security! haha..... anywayz....

it started out that amanda and chris were just in a little dispute, which constantly goes down, so its not like it was anything i havent heard, or anything that i havent warned her about. I just want my friends to be happy, and not get screwed over by some asshole.... ANYWAYZ> we went out to green, and F*ckin see him out there, get this, WITH ANOTHER GIRL! OUCH... and it wasnt just any girl, it was SHAWNA! the bitch that broke joshs heart and the bitch that chris messed around with or something. I want to hit that bitch in the face! Well obviously this sight upset amanda like no other (i would be hella pissed too) So i was there for my girl through the crying, yelling, cussing... what are friends for?

Well we met these guys from newburgh (thugs obviously, cuz i apparently have a "I like ghetto trash" on my forehead) well, while amanda went with ricki in his car, i was alone :( so i asked them, i was like "will one of you come with me, so i'm not by myself" and they were like why dont you come with us, we were just getting ready to smoke.... My frown quickly turned upside down! :) so i jumped in (sat on the hot passengers lap, and got the second hit) yeah, fun times, stupid ass things i do! oh well! The two up front were hot! Well they ended up calling me a couple things and want me to go out with them to "get up" or something with them... i was like "what the hell is 'get up" and apparently i am not down with the rich boy ghetto wannabe slang.

Definition:

"get up" - to hang out/chill

So we'll see what happens after work (speakin of work, i'm about to be late if i dont go soon)

*jimmy would be unbelievably pissed if he found out that i....

1. rode with some thugs that i didnt know (especially sitting on ones lap)

and

2. SMOKED! (i was a good kid this week, uh... well thursday and friday. i turned down the opportunity GEEZ! ***Off to work***

# posted by cori @ 10:07 AM

Saturday, July 19, 2003

Well, i was suppose to get off today at 5, but they asked if i'd mind to stay til 8. I mean its not like i have any big plans or actually do anything here! HAHA, so its all good! The sales manager asked me if i would stay

"well Doris told me that i needed to go home at 8 today, and i just didnt want to piss her off, i wasnt sure if the time mattered"

"Can i just say something without you getting offended?"

"ok"

"F*ck Doris, you know F*ck what she says"

"haha, um ok, i can stay its no big deal"

hahaha, they are so funny here! I was just told that I'm the "favorite"!

So i guess i'm here for another couple hours! hmm.... back to my games

# posted by cori @ 5:20 PM

*i take the short cut out of blogging and just put in some lyrics that may explain myself*

Mya

"my love is like.... whoa"

..........

If you love me like you never wanna let me go

If you’re likin’ what you’re tastin’ really let me know

If you’re gonna love me better love me strong

‘Cause I want this love to love last all night long

My love is like... woah

My kiss is like... woah

My touch is like... woah

My sex is like... woah

My ass is like... woah

My body’s like... woah

And you’re kissin’ it

So what you think of it

# posted by cori @ 2:45 PM

Friday, July 18, 2003

forgot to update my sweet messages

*July 17 "i have been thinking about you all day, i cant wait to talk to you when i get off work. miss you alot"

*July 17 "i have already fallen and can think of nothing i would rather do then be with you. i miss you and cant wait to be with you again."

# posted by cori @ 7:18 PM

System of the Down "Aerials" is a KICK ASS song!!!

*its one of those songs that you turn up really loud and like sing! (over and over again) - its addicting

AERIALS

Life is a waterfall,

We're one in the river,

And one again after the fall.

Swimming through the void

We hear the word,

We lost ourselves,

But we find it all?

Cause we are the ones that want to play,

Always want to go,

But you never want to stay,

And we are the ones that want to chose,

Always want to play,

But you never want to lose.

Aerials, in the sky,

When you lose small mind,

You free your life.

Life is a waterfall,

We drink from the river,

Then we turn around and put up our walls.

Swimming through the void

We hear the word,

We lost ourselves,

But we find it all?

Cause we are the ones that want to play,

Always want to go,

But you never want to stay,

And we are the ones that want to chose,

Always want to play,

But you never want to lose.

Aerials, in the sky,

When you lose small mind,

You free your life.

Aerials, so up high,

When you free your eyes,

Eternal prize.

Aerials, in the sky,

When you lose small mind,

You free your life.

Aerials, so up high,

When you free your eyes,

Eternal prize.

*The other night i got home from Alex's and ate some M&Ms and some Little debbies, etc. I woke up the next morning and went to grab a hand full of M&Ms and the MUTHAs were almost GONE! HAHA! i dont even remember eating them! um.... ok, i obviously wasn't in the completely right state of mind.

*I talked to Jimmy before and after Alex's, well after, he seemed a little pissed at me, not openly pissed, but i could just tell. He said that he didnt want me to quit for him, and i was like "um, sorry but i would never quit anything for a guy" Even though if he was seriously upset with me, i probably would! (i'm pathetic, its just that i am absolutely crazy about this boy and could so easily -if not already- fall for him!)*

# posted by cori @ 1:56 PM

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

ok, second day at new job... and i have A LOT of free time! geez, all i do is sit here, answer the phone when it rings, and talk online or play games or something. oh well, its really easy, the people are nice, and i make more money! so... its all good! (and i think one of the sales guys just read all of this over my shoulder... oh well)

last night, 2 ppl asked me about my "DL" relationship that i was once having (hehe) i had NO IDEA that anyone (well besides the people that i told) knew about it. and besides the obvious people that were mutual friends of ours....

it caught me way off guard when they asked about it!

Anywayz..... according to sam, i'm sure my blog is "elementary" but its ok...

"Only God can judge me".... or something like that... wasnt it Tupac who shared those words of wisdom? Speaking of Tupac, the day Jimmy left, we were 'rollin' listenin to Tupac and the infamous "California Love" and he was amazed that i knew the words.

"soon as i step on the scene i'm hearin hoochies screamin"

He just looked at me and was like, "that is so hot" (yes, im good - i know my old school rap) hehe....

Last night after work, i was on the phone with him, having a possibly psychotic conversation (i'm still unsure as to how i should be taking him)

"i found out today that i have to wait another 30 days before i can transfer"

"transfer where? why? what are you talking about?

"you have to work for 90 days before you can transfer to a new location, and theres one close to you"

"um.... are you serious"

"yeah, i am completely serious. i'm still thinking about it, kinda exploring all possibilites, all my options"

(thinking in my head -"holy shit") "well thats cool, but are you sure you want to do that, i mean you would be leaving a lot behind, and i thought you wanted your toys"

"i would be leaving all bad behind, and beginning a new, with good. and i am still trying to work out the details with my toys"

*now of course this isnt the exact conversation, but its close to what i remember... the bottom line _____ he wants to move! to be closer to me, and i'm not completely sure how i feel about this. i mean of course i would love it, because i could so easily see myself falling in love with the boy! Who knows maybe i am... HAHA... and the role of the psycho is reversed! :o) there are just so many things about him that make me so happy, i just cant even describe the feelings i have towards him... ITS "HYPE"* hehe

# posted by cori @ 4:59 PM

Tuesday, July 15, 2003

finally figured out how to post up links! i'm hyperlink illiterate (and i'm not sure if i can spell either!)

# posted by cori @ 9:42 AM

Monday, July 14, 2003

Jimmy just left.... :*( so i'm pathetically sitting here listening to songs from the cd i made him. i came to this conclusion now that he's gone that....

HE IS THE MOST AMAZING GUY EVER!!!

and heres why....

1. he's absolutely GORGEOUS!

2. he is sooo sweet

3. he is such a good kisser!

4. he's funny

5. he's kick ass to be around

6. he offers to buy me things

7. he opens all the doors

8. he pays for my food! (YAH FOOD)

9. he kisses my hand

10. he has such sweet kisses (the random ones are the best)

11. he always compliments me, with sincere compliments! (hehe)

*i could seriously go on and on!! it sucks so bad that i found such an amazing guy, that lives so far away! i already miss him soo much! its just the way he looks at me, kisses me, everything, makes me so happy!

Today we ate at the casino, and parked at the very top of the parking garage and on the way down i was being stupid and was like, 'we should kiss on every level, as many times as the level we're on'.... it was fun! old people kept like pulling in and seeing us! hehe, but it was so worth it... and i got to kiss him in the elevator (i've always wanted to do that), and i got to kiss him on the escalator! he is just so sweet! and i have got to see him again soon.... He is like i am trying to think of a way i can come see you in a week... YAY! i dont know if it will happen or not, but hey, i can hope! i just need to get my road trip plan on the go!

*he says that when i kiss him, "its breath taking"* HEHE!

my song for the moment...

Ashanti, "baby"

See, I could never feel alone with you (in my life),

I gave up everything I own for you (won't think twice),

almost a shame how I'm mesmerized (such a shame),

I loose my thought looking in your eyes (I know why)

because your kisses make my lips quiver and (that's real)

and when you touch me my whole body shivers.....

# posted by cori @ 7:32 PM

Saturday, July 12, 2003

this morning i go get my schedule, yay....um.... no

Jimmy comes in less than 24 hours!!!! he is on his way as soon as he leaves his work, which is at like 11 tonight! so he'll end up here at like 5 in the morning - haha - which kinda sucks for me seeing as i want to SLEEP and i wanted to be all cute and stuff for when he first gets here, oh well, maybe i'll just like do my hair and makeup before i go to bed! :o)

i get to share the news tonight! i am kinda scared and not looking forward to this at all.... i love showplace and i'm not ready to quit, but i have to. well not necessarily HAVE to, its a slight want, but the new job will be better.

1. i get to play mind games with the detail guy (hehe, he said i'm hot)

2. better hours

3. better pay

4. and it will look better on my applications for other jobs (and my resume that i dont have)

anywayz, i am gonna "bizzounce" and get ready to go up to cool USI!

# posted by cori @ 9:48 AM

Friday, July 11, 2003

today was the most boring and pointless day, ever! i had that damn orientation crap. it was so stupid, but at least i got some free chips and a drink! i'm only in it for the food!.... i am really starting to dread going to college. oh well...i'll get use to it i guess.

i need to go to the tanning bed but am being too lazy at this moment.

i just got off the phone with jimmy!* he calls me baby! its so cute - he's so hot! and he's gonna be here in like a day! i miss him so much!

anywayz.... J.B. wants to do something tonight, but i am not sure, he wants to go tan when i do (oddly enough) and then he's going to 'poker night' and wants me to go, but i dont really want to, so i'll probably sit my loser ass at home and keep cleaning! haha

I start my new job tuesday! i'm excited! i need to put in my 2 wks notice, but i guess i'll do that tomorrow night when i work. i still dont know how i'm gonna do it, or what i'm going to say.

i hate it when guys think they are the cool ones cuz they 'played' you or whatever (even though i doubt he did, he couldnt get any 'play' HAHA) but anywayz, i hate it when they think they are big 'players' when i'm the one who's been playin their ass! hehe, SCANDALOUS! oh well, it will all be good (especially when jimmy is here!)

last night i emailed him a really sweet email, cuz i'm just sweet like that! haha.... but he wrote me a little message back

"I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. I MISS YOU TOO. I THINK ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME. CANT WAIT TO HOLD YOU"

its gonna be great when hes here!

# posted by cori @ 6:46 PM

Thursday, July 10, 2003

its nice how ppl let me know (well, not exactly let me know, i just kinda figured) that its not working after the hickies and my trip to florida. HAHA, "age" is the problem... which is fine with me, cuz i was thinking me being scandalous was the problem.

**OHHH and we have "too different of lifestyles"... what the hell is that suppose to mean!? i know i like the human sacrifices and illegal drugs and all the annonomous sex i can get, but SHIT! (haha, excuses are hilarious)

Anywayz...

Jimmy comes in 2 days!! i am so excited! Ali said we should come into a movie sunday -> i just might do that!

I finally got my room done! WOO.... i wanted to burn my damn mini blinds! but they're all good now.

Well, Brent found out that the snow cone guy is engaged... TO A WOMAN! hehe...better luck next time!

Tonight on the phone, when i was talking to Jimmy, he said the sweetest thing "i am so crazy about you" um, or something along those lines. it made me want to cry, it was sooo sweet, and he lives soo far away!! :*( but at least i get to see him in 2 DAYS!!

Morning message:

"i cant wait to see you. i miss you so much. i think about you all the time. sleep good"

# posted by cori @ 11:30 PM

Wednesday, July 09, 2003

a few things before i get off here....

1. i have a job thingy tomorrow at the car dealership place, i havent decided what i'm going to do with showplace though cuz i love working there! :( we'll see what happens

2. i hate mini blinds!

and the best....

3. Jimmy found out his schedule today, and he is coming to visit.... (DRUM ROLL)

SUNDAY AND MONDAY!!!! which is only like 3 days away!!!! i am so happy!!!!

Morning message:

"i hope you slept good. i miss you and i cant wait to kiss you"

GEEZ!! only 3 more days!

# posted by cori @ 10:49 PM

Tuesday, July 08, 2003

ok i will shoot my computer! i had this whole thing typed and then my aol decides to kick me off.....

Today i went to the tanning bed and tanned in the 'ultra tan 350' or 650, i dont remember but it looked like a big space ship, it was exciting. it got extremely hot though!

Last night i talked to jimmy before bed (he says i help him sleep better, so he has to talk to me every night before he goes to sleep so he can have better dreams) or something like that... he's so sweet!

Then i wake up this morning to a message (like always!)

*"you are great i cant wait to be with you"*

he completely kicks ass! He makes me so happy :o)

I am still not done cleaning my freakin room!! I am close, or at least closer than last night! AHHH! oh well, it will be clean one of these days. I hate this, my blog before this was so much better, i hate AOL! OMG, the other night when i was talking with jason, we were talking about the time i called J.B and some girl answered, well i havent heard from J.B. since graduation. Today he called me out of nowhere! well then i talked to him tonight too, and he wants to do something this wknd, but then again he always says that then i dont hear from him for weeks. well, whatever happens - happens. It doesnt really matter to me, i'm sick of caring, guys in evansville are over-rated. anyways on a brighter note...

Jimmy comes to visit in like 8 days!! i am going to drive myself crazy thinking about him, but its all good because he is so sweet and worth going crazy over! well, i'm out.... i have got to finish this damn room and take a shower!* PAYCE

# posted by cori @ 10:21 PM

Monday, July 07, 2003

For some odd reason i thought i would take on the task of deep cleaning my room and re-arranging it! damn dude i started at about 6:30-7ish, and its now 10 and i am no where near being done!! haha, oh well, i'll finish tomorrow night or something? there were so many dust bunnies it was ridiculous, how have i lived this long in filth?! :o) oh well, i give it a week and it will be back to being as dirty as it was!

(on a jimmy note, i have yet to talk to him today)

# posted by cori @ 10:17 PM

ok, i'm gonna start this blog out by saying, MY BODY IS BURNING!!! (i went to the tanning bed - as if i wasnt tan enough- and did the stand up thing and used the "blazin" stuff with tingle: therefore, my body is burning and itching badly!) Benefits: once the tingle/burning/itching goes away, i will have a better tan!

It has become a trend in these blogs that i mention jimmy at least once, but i will get to that later....

I believe that i am the person that homosexuals feel comfortable around (seeing as i have a lot of gay guy friends) Brent always has me go with him to see these guys that he is 'sweatin up on'. It kinda makes me feel good that i know that i am the one he can put his trust in to talk to about these things. its fun! we can comment on guys together, and believe it or not, the boy has good advice about guys. He has met this dude at the snow cone place, that i was fortunate to meet the other night, and he's a hottie! and drives a bad ass mustang. I had my fun flirting with the other guy working there. Brent's little "crush" is 21, and a questionable gay/straight guy. Things are so confusing! but hey, i'm here to talk to and give as much possibly useful advice as i can!

ok.... now.... to JIMMY!

only like 9 or so days before i can see him!!! he always leaves me the sweetest text messages, and thinking about him always makes me smile :o)

the greatest one was:

"i cant stop thinking about you, and i love it" - now how sweet is that!

then i received one last night

"i cant wait to see you, hope you have a good night. i will be dreaming of being with you"

and to think the boy lives like 5-6 hours away!! WHY ME!

Here are some other messages he has sent me.....(yes i am pathetic, but its not everyday a gorgeous guy is this nice).....

July 1 "Hearing from you makes my day. You are great, i cant wait to kiss you" - i like that one!

July 2 "yeah, well girl i am crazy about you"

July 2 "you are so nice to me, i want to be with you really bad"

July 7 "you will be with me soon and i cant wait. you are amazying and i miss you"

There are so many more, he leaves at least one a day, and they are always sooo sweet! Ok...enough of this for now! hehe, i'm gonna BIZZOUNCE* go take a shower to try to relieve the burning sensation! (that sounds real gross! but u know what i'm sayin)

# posted by cori @ 5:41 PM

Sunday, July 06, 2003

I AM THE BIGGEST KLUTZ!

i went out with jason ward tonight and first, tripped up the stairs at showplace, then ran into the door at taco bell....hahaha!!!

it was a fun time tho, we sat outside (beautiful night) and talked about everything - well it was mostly me talking about stupid random shit, but still thats not the point! We had a good time.

I am sure it will be nothing compared to the time i'll have with JIMMY!! aww i am soo excited! you just do not understand how bad i want to see him right now! GEES! everyday is only one day closer! WOO!!

# posted by cori @ 11:27 PM

Jimmy comes to see me in 10 days!!! i am so excited! i know i'm crazy but i seriously miss him. if only he lived here. Even tho i'm sure it would be completely different if he lived here. He would be like all the others (as if there are so many) hehe...

ok i realized how lazy i am (FINALLY)

i like to sit on my bed with my 'hands free' thing for the cell phone and use my lap top. i have all this stuff right at an arms length, so really the only reason i would have to leave my bed, would be to go to the bathroom...SOLUTION: pee in a cup

ok my top 10 list for the day:

Things um.. that i want to do:

10. Clean my room (we're talking REALLY clean)

9. Wash my car

8. Unpack my Florida stuff (wont happen today)

7. Stay tan (i get more compliments this way)

6. Work out and get a nice bod (my love handles are showin a little too much love)

5. Compete and win Indiana Teen USA (haha... bitch i will)

4. Find a new fast pretty car

3. mmm.... Go eat at grandma's (i think i've had enough of grandma for a while, a week with her in florida has put me over the top)

2. Figure out my manager (i'm scandalous, problem solved)

1. SEE MY JIMMY!! (ok that sounds weird, but you know what i'm sayin)

*HE COMES IN LIKE 10 DAYS!! WOO HOO*

~Listen to the Case "missing you" song, and those are my thoughts exactly~

# posted by cori @ 10:13 AM

Saturday, July 05, 2003

i hate guys (cept 4 jimmy!) - those are my thoughts for the moment

# posted by cori @ 6:07 PM

Friday, June 27, 2003

Since Ellen went off on her own, i decided i would create one for myself. Get all personal n shit. There is so much random shit that goes on, and this thingy will, you know- help that; help you get inside this head of mine (not that you would really want to) but anyway - blog #1 ... if you are a "blog virgin" (hehe sorry ellen) then read this from bottom up, it may help explain things better.

Things i love about Jimmy

Some Sites

Ellen's blog
Sam's blog
My work
Games