Hi sweetie,
Today is Thanksgiving ? and we managed to get through the day. I brought your apple muffin candle to the table at Carol R?s and I lit it and I sort of felt good to have it there but also felt like we didn?t do enough to recognize that you weren?t there. But I didn?t feel comfortable to continue calling attention to it and so I just lit your candle again when we got home.
I?m glad I made a plan for today. It was a good day. I didn?t feel terribly sad or depressed, just sort of resigned I guess. I called your Aunt Terri last night, talked to your sister for a few minutes today and called Alberta. They were all almost perfunctory calls. I did it to be nice and because you loved your family. They say they all think of me a lot ? but they don?t call. I can understand this from Terri, she?s weak a lot from chemo. Alberta says she sent two books to me about grief. I?ll read them. I hope they help.
Okay, so we slept in this morning because I had trouble falling asleep last night. Carol was running a little behind too because she called and asked to meet us at the movie theatre. We saw ?Harry Potter and the Sorcerer?s Stone?. What an excellent movie!!! I think you would have liked it a LOT. I saw another movie I want to see that opens on my birthday, ?The Lord of the Rings?. I was talking to the kids about going out for dinner and then seeing that movie. There?s a new Jim Carrey movie I think I?d like to see too?
Anyway, Joanne is right?it does help to have a plan. Carol have another friend over Mary Ellen and we had a really nice Thanksgiving dinner, no grace, no big deal over anything, everyone was well behaved, and we had some great conversation.
I?m sorry you weren?t with us ? maybe you were. I?d like to think so, Rich. I really do love you and miss you a lot. It hurts not to have you here but not as much as it would if I?d stayed home.
Love you, my darling,
Me