Hi sweetheart,
I was wide awake at around four or so this morning. I?m not sure why. I was thinking about you and looking for you. I looked into the corner of our bedroom and called to you in my mind. I kind of expected you to show up, but I didn?t give it long enough or I just don?t know how to do this because I could feel myself becoming stressed. I thought about getting up and realized how much sleep I?d miss and how miserable I?d feel.
About five, I felt stronger this need to go downstairs. Billy was down there and I wondered if something had happened to him. I went downstairs and he was sleeping peacefully so that wasn?t it. Then I thought, well, Rich, you died down here, maybe you would show up down here? But I couldn?t focus and nothing happened. I wondered if you were trying to come through and communicate?I wish I knew what to do. I miss you so much.
I came to work and tried meditating. I got a mental image of your face and called to you inwardly. I also tried praying to God to let me know that you are all right. I guess I?m just not concentrating right. I feel really yucky today, very sleepy and out of it. I wish I knew what was going on.