Dear Rich,
I did it! I made it over the Verrazano Bridge! Okay, I cheated a little bit; I took the lower level instead of the upper but I still did it! I prayed to God, to the Archangel Michael and to you for help, and I really felt like I wssn't alone. I didn't even have a panic attack!
You would have been proud of Billy. This morning he got up at 5:30 and walked across the street to return the Nintendo games and to get us bagels for breakfast. He also cleaned up most of the house. Heidi helped too, but Billy did the bulk of it. I swear he's been like a totally different kid since you left us. I'm not sure exactly why ....
I am so proud of me! I got us one third of the way on this trip and I have not snapped anyone's head off at all. The TV I bought so the kids culd watch movies worked out great. They picked three movies to watch.
We hit all this traffic around 6 and it was almost bumper to bumper until we finally got to the Comfort Inn just now ... and it's like 9:30 p.m. Whew! 12 hours on the road was not what I expected and hopefully the rest of the trip won't be as arduous.
You know I met Teddy today. Did you send him to me, Rich? He LOOKS like you--the only difference is his van dyke beard and hair is more silver than yours. But then Teddy is 48 and you were only 40. Teddy is a sheet metal worker and so he was strong muscular arms.
We met at McDonald's near his home in New Jersey. He wanted me to come to his house but I had a feeling we would really be delayed so we're going to go see him on the return trip. I feel like he's okay ... he's sorta like a blessing. He's a bit more on the religious and saved side than me but he is also very courtly and I like that.
When we got out of the car, he was just pulling up next to us. We knew who we were right away. I was so glad to see him and he to see me we gave each other a big bear hug. We'd brought gifts for each other -- I brought him a musical bunny rabbit. I had a feeling he would llike it and he did, he laughed and said oh, he had to bring this one to work. He gave me a dear bear angel. I decided to call her Teddie. Ha!
I took his hand, it's not long like yours. It's short, his fingers stubby, and much rougher than yours. He likes holding hands and we talked for about 2 hours at McDonald's. Then I said we needed to be on the way. We walked back to the car and made plans for next Sunday.
I let him kiss me. He said I was sweet and I kissed him. And then again. I didn't feel guilty. I miss you, Rich, I always will and I will always love you. Teddy is sweet, though, and I like him. We got into the cars, waving at each other and blowing kisses. When Teddy turned right and I turned left, Billy teased me. "Mom has a boyfriend, Mom has a boyfriend!"
Later, when we stopped in Maryland for dinner, Heidi suddenly broke into tears and said she missed you. I asked her if it was because of Teddy and she said sorta. She misses you. The Zoloft deadens her feelings she said and she doesn't have anyone to talk to. I told her she could always talk to me, that I would never be angry with anything she said. I told her that I miss you too and I will always love you. We left it at that. I think we are having fun so far, Rich. I hope that you're with us and enjoying the trip as much as we are (except for the traffic!) :P
Love you,
Me