i *heart* incubus...
today was ok... i went to the mizall and spent lots of money... =/...grandma is rad... and i saw rocker! and i got a rocker hug! yay! i still fear he doesnt think of me as a friend *tear*... that also makes me think about ther other "friends" that i think do not think of me as a friend... (wow thats confusing)... but yea today was ok just not interesting...i pray for something interesting to happen (i almost crave it).... *tear*.... i have nothing more to say.... i leave you with quote! =D "these eyes R not ur eyes & these eyes R not the color that ur arid eyes might be! NO i wasnt around when these eyes of urs decidedso i refuse 2 kneel B4 the sights U choose 2 see" ~INcuBus~( I *HEART* INCUBUS!!!!!!!!!! )

i pray for something interesting to happen....
ok just got up like 20minutes ago.... took a shower and in like an hour im off to the mizall... perhaps today will be ok... maybe even fun, GREAT, Rad, nifty... something not boring and blah!!!!.... i shall let you know how the day goes....

boring and BLAH!!!....
ok today was sooooo boring..... and BLAH! i ate waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much.... BLAH! *cries* i had the weirdest feeling tho... i felt full and EMPTY at the same time... WEIRD!!!!... but ya... i still have that overwhelming feeling of being hollow... and i just feel all BLAH! and *cries*.. i have nothing more to say.... today was boring and BLAH!... i leave you with a quote as usual.... "Darling, give me your absence tonight ,Take the shade from the canvas and leave me the white, Let me sink in the silence that echoes inside, And don't bother leaving the light on, 'Cuz I suddenly feel like a different person, From the roots of my soul come a gentle coercion, And I ran my hand over a strange inversion, A vacancy that just did not belong,The child is gone" ~ Fiona Apple~

back....
hello blog... im sorry i have not been able to write my computer was like FUCKED!!! sooo ya.... but its all good now and i shall update you on my FUCKED UP LIFE!!!! .... blah!

days like this i dont know what to do with myself....
ok... so its like 2:00 in the fuckin morning and i cant sleep cuz im crying too hard... and i keep looking at my beautiful scars... and i want to make more... because they seem to be the only beautiful part of my body... and BLAH! i always fool myself with lies of "never and always" but I FOOL MYSELF! so i am to blame! yep yep! ME! blame it on me! and *cries* i dont know... BLAH! *cries*....i have nothing more to say.. but fiona says it perfectly so i leave you with her... ... "days like these i dont know what to do with myself" ~fiona apple~

Sullen Girl...
i just feel so empty... i have nothing more to say.. i leave you with... "Sullen Girl" by Fiona Appl... "Days like this, I don't know what to do with myself All day - and all night I wander the halls along the walls and under my breath I say to myself I need fuel - to take flight - And there's too much going on But it's calm under the waves, in the blue of my oblivion Under the waves in the blue of my oblivion Is that why they call me a sullen girl - sullen girl They don't know I used to sail the deep and tranquil sea But he washed me shore and he took my pearl - And left an empty shell of me And there's too much going on But it's calm under the waves, in the blue of my oblivion Under the waves in the blue of my oblivion Under the waves in the blue of my oblivion It's calm under the waves in the blue of my oblivion "

BLAH!!!....
"each drag's a drop of blood a grain, a minute of my life, it's all i've got just to stay down, why the fuck am i still down?" ~the UsEd~ dont you like how i post like every hour??? ya whatever im a dork....and blah! i hate me! i shall post later on tonight.... BLAH BLAH BLAH!

boring....
ok so i started the day all tired and stuff... then my sis decided to go and wash cars... so yea! *shes crazy* and then we got our high school schedules in the mail! *SOMEONE SAVE ME!!!!* im afraid of going to high shool! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! *help* and then i was hungry so my mum brought me to subway.. I <3 SUBWAY! hahaha.... and now im BORED.... it has been a boring day... and we shall see what the night brings....

the taste of ink....
"being half dead wasn't what i planned to be, now i'm ready to be free!"~the UsEd~ ok so i slept till like 12:30 today... BLAH! and i feel all tired and grrrness! so yea... BLAH BLAH BLAH!

i dont want to be me....
"I'm crying black tears, anger, hate, sorrow.I'm bleeding black blood, freedom, peace, joy. u're sick of hearing how much I hate myself. & I'm afraid of who I've become!"

I DONT WANT TO FUCKIN BE ME ANYMORE!!!! i am soooo sick and tired of being the person i have become! SOMEONE KILL SAM! =[ *cries*