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I still don't believe it
I still don't think I ever will
She just recently started to become with the "ur mom" phase, which everyone goes through
its when everytime someone asked you a question, you'd reply with "ur mom" and laugh for a while and then say "ok, what?"
Those were good times
Good times we all had together
We should always cherish those memories, as a final gift from her to us.
I'm so pissed
I'm angry
seriously, around the first few months of school she was like, complaining about her mom and shit like that I guess what I said?
"uh, your mom went through all this pain to bring you into this world."
and she said that her mom went through anesthetic surgery
Its ironic
I first got to know her in 7th grade, mrs. Bagan's class, with Alex TRoung, and we'd always make fun of the teacher
and in bio, this year
we'd make more fun of the teacher
She had hella funny newspaper pants
that was hella funny
I still remember, hella clear and all, when I first realized that she was wearing pants composed of newspapers and I was laughing
"aha you have newspaper pants!"
I didn't really ever pay attention to her feather earings much, since I already knew her personality that way.
She obviously wanted to become some form of a stylist or fashion designer.
THe hell man, if I could only go back in time, just change ONE second of what I said, everything could be better.
Just maybe
That god damn "maybe" is killing me and probably everyone else who knew her right now...
I should've talked to her more.
She also was inviting people to join her little "pen" club.
each time I remember a memory about here its always something funny, something to laugh about.
She said I wasn't special enough to join her club.
I dont know if that was a compliment or not...
I find myself thinking about her more, wishing for more things,
Its when I'm alone at home it hits me
but it still only skims the god damn surface of my understanding
I always, thought myself much stronger than this
to be unaffected
but oh how wrong i was
I'm going to miss her
a lot
you see, I love planing ahead
I could've seen me, and all the groups of guys and girls, plus Elissa, all happy and dancing up and down at graduation
I'm going to miss her
just haven't started believing yet
I'm still in disbelief
no one ever will...
It feels as if.... she moved to texas
Damnit, I should've talked to her more.
She was such a great person
Such a good person
Its still like some dream
or some goddamn reality show


(she's the girl on the left)
8/28/89-4/24/04 Elissa Horton