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My Beloved



THEY MET...

In February 1980 Diana spent her first weekend at Sandringham in the company of the Royal Family without being accompanied by a sister. Although she was excited she played down the excitement of her friends: "What do you think would happen, it's only a weekend hunt at Sandringham." The interjection "my God, perhaps you'll be the next Queen of England", she dismissed whilst she was scrubbing the oven: "I hardly think so. Can you imagine me in rubber gloves and a robe?" Diana travelled to Sandringham together with Lady Amanda Knatchbull. She was the granddaughter of Lord Mountbatten who had been murdered in August 1979 by the IRA, and who Charles had seen as a "substitute father" for many years. A friend of Diana's, Philip, invited Diana in July 1980 to a barbecue at his parents' house in Petworth. As his mother was the Queen's Lady in Waiting, he could promise Diana that she would meet Prince Charles: "You are young, he might like you." Diana was given a place next to Prince Charles at the barbecue. Both later remembered that they began with friendly pleasantries, however soon came to talk about the magnificent funeral service held for Lord Mountbatten. All the world knew how much he had meant to Prince Charles, but Diana said it spontaneously: "You looked so sad as you had to walk down the aisle. I have never seen anything so sad before. My heart bled as I saw you so, and I thought: "That is not right, you are completely alone, you should have someone with you who you trust". With this a spark must have been ignited, as the picture that the twelve years older Charles had previously had of the little Spencer daughter transformed itself decisively.
Hardly back home, and Diana first experienced what it meant to be placed into the royal calendar. One Sunday afternoon a telephone call told her that Prince Charles would be prepared to accompany her to a performance of Verdi's "Requiem" in the Royal Albert Hall. Her grandmother Lady Ruth Fermoy would come as chaperone, and would also be present at a cold buffet in his private quarters in Buckingham Palace. In August 1980 the next invitation arrived. This time she was invited to a sailing weekend at Cowes. At the beginning of September the Prince newly invited Diana to an extended weekend, this time to Balmoral. Fittingly Diana's sister Jane and her husband lived in a small farmhouse on the Royal Estate. Here Diana could live comfortably, was however repeatedly called by Charles as to whether she would lend him company during a walk, or at a barbecue. Diana had accompanied Charles fishing on the River Dee as the distant flash of binoculars and camera lenses fell on her. As she knew how much her sister Sarah had been upset by attention from the press, she immediately pulled on a headscarf like a cowl and turned herself away. Craftily, and impressing Prince Charles, who remained back, she kept her back to the journalists and observed the photographers using the mirror in the lid of her powder compact. However her anonymity only lasted for one weekend, and with this weekend in 1980 Lady Diana Spencer lost the part of her life as a private person. Already on 8th September The Sun betrayed to the nation that behind the back of public life a Royal Romance had almost started again. The curtain had been lifted.
"Patiently smiling she bore in public the siege of her apartment block or the "Young England Kindergarten", being followed in her car and outstretched microphones. Still very naive she tried to shake off the most annoying photographer by promising him that if he never turned up again she would let herself be photographed outside the kindergarten with some of the children. The professional had promised everything for this photo. He cleverly positioned the innocent group against the sun and took the world famous picture which completely exposed Diana's legs though a far too thin skirt. At the time the Prince turned up his nose in amusement at the picture and forgave her with the ticking-off: "I knew that you have good legs, but I had overlooked the fact that they are quite so spectacular. Do you necessarily have to show them to everybody?" From then on Diana was on her guard, even when it was difficult. She couldn't have imagined that this would be her future way of life. The case’ first grew critical when the media presented a newspaper article about Diana having spent the night on the Royal train. They opened the hypocritical discussion as to whether Diana - if she had the nerve to visit her Charles then - was still a virgin or not. The debate over virginity, previous experience and platonic or close friends of the teenage Diana put the court on the spot. Officially the bearer of future heirs to the throne must go into marriage as a virgin, a discussion about this would however always do damage to the reputation of the Palace and the bride. It resulted in a need for action. Diana spent the Christmas of 1980 at Althorp, and then New Year's Eve with her friends at the shared flat in London. During New Year Diana visited Charles at Sandringham. After this weekend the hysterically speculating press could hardly be held back, all reports screamed about a declaration: Is she the one? Prince Charles however went skiing in January 1981, well knowing that in February Diana would fly with her mother and step-father to their sheep farm in Australia. Charles was supposed to decide there whether he would marry Diana or not. It was not love for Charles, but Diana had all the qualities that one should possess in his social circle. He is supposed to have once told a friend: "I don't love her, but she has the best qualities". At the beginning of February Prince Charles rang her from his ski resort of Klosters in Switzerland, just to tell her that after his return there would be something important that he must ask her. Whilst bourgeois lovers perhaps hurry directly to their intended in order to propose to her, royals undertake the hurdles of duty. On 3rd February Prince Charles returned, took part in a aircraft carrier manoeuvre and first managed to ask Diana to come to Windsor Castle on 6th February. There in the so-called nursery, he told Diana how much he had missed her in the Alps and whether she would marry him. Overpowered and embarrassed Diana broke into her typical giggling whereby Charles repeated how serious the issue was to him, as of course she would also one day become queen through it. Later Diana remembered how she heard herself speaking, how she finally agreed and had ever more repeated how much she loved him. To which the Prince answered: "Whatever loves means".
Diana first told her news to her friends in the apartment. Then things undertook a breathless pace. On 23rd February Diana moved out of her apartment in Coleherne Court and into Buckingham Palace, where she should learn correctness and a little knowledge of courtly life. Already when saying goodbye to her friends Diana's new bodyguard, Paul Officer, ambiguously noted: "You should know that this is the last day of your live as a private person, make the best out of it!" The then very well informed Times already reported on the same day, 24.02.1981, that the official statement went to the press, about the engagement. At midday the dream pair gave a television interview in the grounds of Buckingham Palace, the first of very few in Diana's life.
The freshly engaged pair already had their first official appearance on 9th March at a charity event at London's Goldsmith's Hall. Diana appeared in a very deeply cut shoulder and backless dress made from silk over a not too certain sitting corsage and as she got out of the car she offered the photographers the second sensational photo to go round the world: pretty sexy Diana. A storm of flashbulbs outside and spotlights inside, the cheering and being at the centre of attention made Diana however feel very insecure. Through brave dieting since the engagement her nerves were thinner, then came Charles' criticism shortly before they departed: As she proudly appeared in his study in her only dress suitable for the occasion, he complained completely unimpressed, that at court one only wore black when in mourning. At the ball itself a woman, who like her had married into different circles, took away her uncertainty. Princess Grace of Monaco retreated back with her, particularly praised her dress and listened to Diana's complaints about the sudden isolation and her fears for the future. Her cheering advice was: "Don't worry, it will all get a lot worse!"
Three episodes and an unreasonable demand could have warned Diana at the time, as years later she first saw through how strongly she had been taken in and planned. At her first move from the shared flat into royal Clarence House no-one apart from the lady-in-waiting was expecting and greeted her. But already on her bed lay an invitation, written before the engagement ( well judged ), from Camilla to a ( well planned ) dinner, which very soon turned out to be a strategic dinner to be held when Charles was on a five-week-long trip which would take him to Australia and New Zealand, and finally to Venezuela, Washington and Williamsburg. It annoyed her that Camilla was one step ahead. Directly before his departure Diana was still flirting with her fiance in his Buckingham Palace office, perhaps she had also, as she often enjoyed during the engagement period, sat on his lap, in any case at this moment of saying goodbye the telephone rang, on the other end was Camilla, who also wanted to say goodbye. Diana was unsure at the time as to how she should react, she immediately left the room so as not to disturb the private conversation, and later told friends that the situation, and her own, likewise his reaction, had "broken my heart". The rivalry instinct was awaken, the aftertaste of the momentary defeat was only with difficulty shaken off. Charles was away for five weeks, the television kept the camera on a visibly upset, blushing Diana, who suddenly burst into tears, whose true reasons for doing so no-one could have imagined.
Diana and her own family, mother as well as two sisters, prepared the wedding in BP, wrote guest lists and ideas for the day together. Many secrets were made about the wedding dress for the dream wedding. It didn't appeal to Diana any more at the end, as it had to be taken in many times due to her successful dieting. Diana had to realise at this time that different rules were followed at BP to those which she was used to. She also enforced to have things similar to what she was used to at Althorp, for a chat or to make herself a quick sandwich surrounded by her servants in the palace kitchens. This behaviour unnerved the servants, so one of them appointed herself as a speaker and explained to Diana strictly, but clearly, the threshold as being the dividing line between the authorised royal domain and the unauthorised kitchen domain. Two days before the wedding a rather too high-spirited ball took place in the palace, in "Buck House", for Diana's bourgeoise friends.
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MARRIAGE...

The fairytale wedding was close at hand. She went early to bed on the evening before her wedding, and astonishingly she managed, in the Queen Mother's house, to soon fall a sleep. Her engagement ring, a æÃ30,000 sapphire ring with 14 diamonds, lay on her bedside table. How would her new life as the Princess of Wales look? Had she made the right decision? Would she be able to bear being constantly under public scrutiny? But for such doubts it was now too late. Early in the morning Diana took a hot bubble bath. Tea and toast with orange marmalade was brought to her room, but she sipped just a little tea. Her heart was pounding! Could not everyone in England hear it? She was overwhelmed by the sight of the celebrating crowds who had already been assembling for days beforehand. Diana's favourite make-up artist came to Clarence House with a large suitcase full of make-up, powder and rouge. She applied just a little colour on Lady Di's face, but a great amount of waterproof mascara. Diana should appear fresh and innocent when she appeared at the altar. Then David and Elizabeth Emanuel, the designers of the wedding dress appeared, and helped Diana to get dressed. It was a magnificent gown made from ivory silk with an almost eight metres long veil. The narrow bodice was set with valuable lace, the sleeves opulently gathered up and embellished with little ribbons. It cost £9,000.
Unfortunately the dress designers had not made allowances for the lack of space in the glass coach that should bring Diana and her father to St. Paul's Cathedral. When the bride alighted from the coach the dress was crumpled and full of creases. Yet this circumstance did no damage to the beauty and grace of the bride. Diana appeared to all the observers like a figure from a fairytale. Already Charles, in the gala-uniform of the marines, waited with the Royal Family and all the guests in the cathedral. Diana's mother Frances and her grandmother Lady Ruth Fermoy were allowed to take places very close to the Royal Family, whilst step-mother Lady Raine and Frances' new husband had to make do with the pews behind. Over 700 million people from 58 countries followed on the television how the bride with her father walked down the aisle towards the altar. The Earl of Spencer had tears in his eyes, for it was not only a great day in the life of his daughter, but also in his! He hobbled a little, however this did not detract from him showing true royal dignity and pride.
The solemn ceremony ran not without a few slips. By her acceptance Diana changed the order of Charles' forenames, calling him Phillip Charles Arthur George which led Prince Charles to the joke:"Diana, you have actually married my father". The heir also made a mishap. He declared: "I will share all ’your" goods with you". Obviously he should have promised to have shared ’his" earthly goods. In addition he placed the wedding ring on the left hand. But the worst thing that happened to Charles was the fact that after the vows he forgot to kiss Diana. Was that a bad omen? The celebration of marriage in St. Paul's Cathedral, led by the Archbishop of Canterbury, lasted almost an hour and a half. The following coach ride to the palace, the celebrating crowds, the well practised, but still so strange, waving, Diana completed as though in a trance. How did the 20 year-old really feel and think in these moments? She appeared so relaxed, calm and overjoyed. The pressure on her spirit had been removed. Now she had actually managed it.
Yes, Lady Diana Spencer was the rightful wedded wife of the future king of England! She enjoyed being bathed in the crowds, the deafening celebrations when she received a kiss from Charles while on the balcony of the royal palace. In these unforgettable moments Diana felt herself chosen by God and the world: I am a princess and will one day become queen of England. HURRAH
The dream pair spent the first night at Broadlands, where Charles' parents had once spent their wedding night. The freshly married pair spent the honeymoon on the royal yacht Britannia. A Mediterranean cruise was on the programme, a gift from the queen. Charles and Diana were, however, not alone and undisturbed. As, naturally, a staff of servants was with them. But not only that. Charles used the free time to read science books and also brought his old fishing equipment with him. What a disappointment for Diana! She dreamt of watching romantic sunsets from the deck, with their arms tightly around each other, wanted to breakfast in bed with him, to dance under a glimmering, starry sky. Queen Elizabeth thought more practically, and built official appointments into the programme: if the pair were already visiting Tunisia, Sardinia, Greece and Egypt, then a few official visits would not harm... The cruise lasted for eleven days, which Diana, in spite of everything, greatly enjoyed.
Finally they sailed for Scotland. The queen and her husband Prince Philip were already waiting for the dream couple. Diana and Charles were meant to pass the rest of their honeymoon in the company of the Royal Family. How wonderfully romantic! The heir to the throne did not notice his young wife's disappointment. There could not be anything more enjoyable for him than long hacks, walks and hunts. Diana didn't dare to complain. Before the wedding everyone advised her to be obedient. She was also advised, directly from her father, that to be allowed to marry in to the royal family would mean that she would have to prove her worth. She wanted that, but could she imagine that everything would run with so much difficulty, and with so much formality? Dreadful headaches, stomachache, dizziness, nausea after every bite! Why must a woman be so ill, just because she's pregnant? Diana couldn't understand it. She was, after all, pleased about the baby. Finally she would have a task which totally suited her. Yet, on 5th November 1981, just four months after the wedding, as the Queen officially confirmed her daughter-in-law's pregnancy, Diana's peace came to an end. Innumerable greetings cards were sent to the palace. "The whole world is watching my stomach", Diana complained at the time. The media circus, which was already very oppressive anyway, grew to really unimaginable proportions. And it was clear what the people, kingdom and crown wanted: a son, heir and future king! Diana didn't feel like celebrating. She felt ill! The Queen showed her concern and considerably reduced the number of Diana's official appearances. It was a very fearful time for Prince Charles. He saw his wife suffering and didn't know how he could help her. Why couldn't Diana pull herself together? She was, after all, not the first woman to ever have a baby! Time again Diana managed to keep her composure in public. The entrance to St. Mary's Hospital had been occupied for days by photographers and onlookers. Half the world was in delivery fever, the newspapers didn't know any other theme any more. "I believe that the whole of England lay with me during labour", Diana later said, my fears, and also the pressure which weighed upon me, were dreadful.
On 21st June 1982 Diana brought a healthy baby in to the world. Hurrah, it was a boy! William, the heir to the throne! Her hotel room was like a sea of flowers, red roses everywhere. The Princess was totally exhausted, but very, very happy. It was a difficult birth, which took a very long time. But the suffering was very soon forgotten, now the only thing that counted was the sweet baby in her arms. One could hear the jubilant calls from outside: "long live Diana!" She remained just one day in the hospital. As Charles and Diana stood cradling the baby before the door to the clinic, the crowd applauded and one called out: "Do it once more, Charles!" Relieved smiles on all faces. It was completed, the photographers had their pictures and they could drive home.
Diana took a complete rest. A nanny and an infant nurse cared for tiny William. Charles was so excited by his son and heir, that was not able to take his eyes from him. He gave his wife a small diamond necklace as a sign of his thanks and happiness. But he forgot to give her the necessary attention and love needed. Diana then suffered from a terrible post-natal depression. She cried a lot, without knowing why. Often she spent an entire day in bed in a darkened bedroom. She felt empty and useless. Charles couldn't understand this. Why was she not happy and contented? What was Diana lacking? Psychologists were called upon. The Queen was stunned as she heard what was happening in Kensington Palace. Why was her daughter-in-law so weak? She had everything that a woman's heart could wish for. No-one showed any understanding, neither Diana's own husband, nor the rest of the Royal Family. And time and time again she was bombarded with reproaches, time and time again she had the feeling that she was doing everything wrong. It would have been so simple to have helped her at this time. Diana needed only peace and patience. Luckily Diana was very soon able to overcome her depressive phase. She was happy about the baby and pacified it with devotion. Prince Charles was also completely crazy about the little chap, the three grew into a proper family together Diana cared very intensively for her son, despite the nanny. Charles proved a true talent in baby care. Servants happily reported that the heir to the throne had taken a bath with William.
Wills was now nine months old and his parents had to make a state visit to Australia. The journey would take six weeks. For Diana such a long separation would be impossible. She insisted on taking William with her. She also explained this to the Queen, who, as expected, categorically denied this wish. Therefore Diana threatened to stay in London with her son. She left no doubts open about fulfilling her threat. A tricky situation for Queen Elizabeth, as she knew that the Australians would be bitterly disappointed if Charles came alone. Diana remained resolute. The Queen permitted it. The Australian visit was a complete success. Storms of excitement and celebration everywhere. Diana even overcame her shyness and could, without pressure, go up to strangers and chat with them.
Even in the same year Diana became pregnant again. Charles reacted to the news with excitement. He obtained complete works about pregnancy and babies. He did not want to hear again the accusation that he could not understand the problems of an expectant mother. He fervently hoped for a cute little girl. But on 15th September 1984 the second son Prince Harry, weighing 3118g, was born.
Diana was an inspirational mother for her sons William and Harry. They always took up first place in her life. Diana loved, protected and cared for her children more than anything. They meant everything to her. Already as a small girl Diana wanted to have at least five children. Later, as "Queen of Hearts", Diana wanted to be the mother of the nation, the mother for the poor and sick of the whole world. William and Harry were her happiness. Diana took on the role of mother with devotion and passion. She wanted her sons to live as normal a childhood as possible, even if that was often difficult to achieve.
Like every young mother Diana played and romped around with her boys, and was very careful that the nanny didn't have too much of an influence. For Diana there was never a question of letting nannies take over the child-raising - something actually routine for aristocratic families. After two dismissals the cheerful Tiggy Legge-Bourke took over the job. And now a true nanny-drama began: Diana insinuated that Tiggy played the role of hostess, flirted with her husband and took over the children. William and Harry truly loved Tiggy, and also today, after Diana's tragic death, she is a very important close contact for the pair. Diana loved having her sons to herself. She spent as much time with them as possible. Diana was a loving mother and best playmate in one person. There was no childish fun that she had not joined in with : roller skating on the long corridors in Kensington Palace, jellybaby eating competitions, log flume rides or dressing-up as ghosts using bedsheets. Sometimes the three even secretly annoyed the old servants by always hiding certain objects. Prince Charles was not always excited by the boisterous games in his house. He insisted that his sons should be made familiar with their future duties as soon as possible. This included discipline, order, first-class manners and also sobriety. Especially William should be raised after kingly principles. After all, the heir to the throne saw him as one day being his future heir. Charles supported a strict upbringing, as a four-year-old he had already had a private teacher and several nannies. As Diana's view of child raising, education and childhood was so different, there was often friction between the married couple. Charles wanted his sons in any case to be under the care of a private teacher for the first few years. Diana insisted on a public nursery. There William and Harry could play with others of the same age. Naturally the Queen completely agreed with her son, and it was almost a miracle that the pair actually went to a nursery in central London a few times. Later Diana's sons went to the public school of Wetherby and afterwards the Ludgrove public boarding school.
Even when it is natural in high society to send the children to boarding school, it was however a painful parting for Princess Diana. Because she naturally loved to have her children around her when she was alone in the evening in Kensington Palace and felt alone. In June 1991 Prince William was accidentally hit by a golf club held by a fellow pupil at the boarding school. Diana raced to the hospital. William had a fractured skull, difficult contusions had to be operated on immediately. But Charles left the hospital to keep and engagement. The operation lasted 75 minutes. Diana didn't understand how a father how a father could leave his son alone at such a moment. As William awoke she was sitting beside him. Diana's sons were her confidantes. She was not shy of showing her feelings openly and honestly. When Diana once sat crying on the loo, having shut herself in, and did not want to come out again, William pushed Kleenex tissues under the door to his mother. He crouched down by the bathroom door and spoke to her. Somehow he nearly always managed to get her to come out. And then he took her up lovingly in his little arms. Diana avoided criticising Charles. She also didn't mention his affair with Camilla. But she couldn't hide her tears from the children. They certainly noticed much about their mother's unhappiness. Diana always had a bad conscience about this. She knew only too well how much children's spirits suffer when their parents argue. She wanted to make it better, to save her children all their concern. Diana always had a deep concern for her youngest. He was a sensitive child, so vulnerable and quiet. Harry often spent the day dreaming, whilst William was a proper roughneck. He could be loud and wild, but also conceal a lot of things. His younger brother liked to have a cuddle. There are innumerable photos which show Diana seeking body contact with Harry. Once she strokes his hair, then she takes him by the arm, or by the hand. She always had the feeling that she had to protect him. Harry was pampered by Diana. It was her way of relieving his sadness over the broken home. With William, her beloved older son, Diana behaved differently. He was her ally, her interlocutor and advisor. When a scandal broke out in the press, she drove to his school and discussed everything with him. She explained what had happened to William, and begged for understanding. Also when it handled delicate things like the Camilla tape, the James Hewitt book, or the "octopus conversation". These must have been dreadfully difficult moments in Diana's life! And it comforted her to know how concerned William was about her wellbeing.
Diana was a devoted mother. But it would be completely wrong to presume that Charles was a bad father. He also loved his sons and tried to make their lives as carefree as possible. He just had a different way with children. Charles couldn't give them the same tenderness as Diana. The source for this certainly laid in his childhood. As a small boy he was not allowed to show any feelings. And so it is no miracle that he wanted to raise William and Harry as proper men. Charles went hunting or fishing with them. He was proud when they caught a hare or had good grades at sport. Charles clapped his oldest on the back with a wink, as he was caught at 14 with a bottle of champagne on school grounds, and his first sexual contact with girls was talked about. He spent a part of the school holidays with his sons in Scotland, undertook long hikes and explained the beauties of nature to them. Diana preferred to fly to distant lands with William and Harry. The children always had fun with their mother: swimming in the Caribbean, water skiing in the Mediterranean, snowball fights in Switzerland. During the holidays the boys were allowed to do everything, but above all to be children. They were allowed to eat hamburgers from the packaging, read comics, play with other boys in the hotel. And this all meant a lot, when one had been born into royalty!
At home in London or also in the elite boarding school Eton they have to wear special armbands, which are tiny locating devices. In the case of a kidnapping the police can tell at once where the children of the Heir to the Throne are. It is unimaginable how great the loss of their beloved mother is to William and Harry. The picture of how they followed their mother's coffin with empty expressions remains in the world's memory forever. And one thing is certain: if Diana had experienced that her heart would have been broken. She was always so concerned about keeping the darker side of life away from her sons. Unfortunately Diana couldn't prevent the breakdown of her family. On the 28th August 1996 the divorce with Prince Charles was finalized. She never wanted this conclusive step. She wanted to remain married solely for her two sons, they should not have to become the product of a broken home. The negotiations with the lawyers ran with difficulty. Naturally it was about money. But not just that. She fought like a lioness over her children. Naturally she knew that the Queen of England would always have a voice in their upbringing. But she was the mother, she didn't want to clear the field without stipulating her requirements. The result did not satisfy the Princess, but more was not to be achieved: Diana was made a divorcee, to a mother with joint custody of her sons William and Harry. She would be allowed to spend 57 days in the year alone with the children.

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CHILDREN...

Dreadful headaches, stomachache, dizziness, nausea after every bite! Why must a woman be so ill, just because she's pregnant? Diana couldn't understand it. She was, after all, pleased about the baby. Finally she would have a task which totally suited her. Yet, on 5th November 1981, just four months after the wedding, as the Queen officially confirmed her daughter-in-law's pregnancy, Diana's peace came to an end. Innumerable greetings cards were sent to the palace. "The whole world is watching my stomach", Diana complained at the time. The media circus, which was already very oppressive anyway, grew to really unimaginable proportions. And it was clear what the people, kingdom and crown wanted: a son, heir and future king! Diana didn't feel like celebrating. She felt ill! The Queen showed her concern and considerably reduced the number of Diana's official appearances. It was a very fearful time for Prince Charles. He saw his wife suffering and didn't know how he could help her. Why couldn't Diana pull herself together? She was, after all, not the first woman to ever have a baby! Time again Diana managed to keep her composure in public. The entrance to St. Mary's Hospital had been occupied for days by photographers and onlookers. Half the world was in delivery fever, the newspapers didn't know any other theme any more. "I believe that the whole of England lay with me during labour", Diana later said, my fears, and also the pressure which weighed upon me, were dreadful. On 21st June 1982 Diana brought a healthy baby in to the world. Hurrah, it was a boy! William, the heir to the throne! Her hotel room was like a sea of flowers, red roses everywhere. The Princess was totally exhausted, but very, very happy. It was a difficult birth, which took a very long time. But the suffering was very soon forgotten, now the only thing that counted was the sweet baby in her arms. One could hear the jubilant calls from outside: "long live Diana!" She remained just one day in the hospital. As Charles and Diana stood cradling the baby before the door to the clinic, the crowd applauded and one called out: "Do it once more, Charles!" Relieved smiles on all faces. It was completed, the photographers had their pictures and they could drive home.
Diana took a complete rest. A nanny and an infant nurse cared for tiny William. Charles was so excited by his son and heir, that was not able to take his eyes from him. He gave his wife a small diamond necklace as a sign of his thanks and happiness. But he forgot to give her the necessary attention and love needed. Diana then suffered from a terrible post-natal depression. She cried a lot, without knowing why. Often she spent an entire day in bed in a darkened bedroom. She felt empty and useless. Charles couldn't understand this. Why was she not happy and contented? What was Diana lacking? Psychologists were called upon. The Queen was stunned as she heard what was happening in Kensington Palace. Why was her daughter-in-law so weak? She had everything that a woman's heart could wish for. No-one showed any understanding, neither Diana's own husband, nor the rest of the Royal Family. And time and time again she was bombarded with reproaches, time and time again she had the feeling that she was doing everything wrong. It would have been so simple to have helped her at this time. Diana needed only peace and patience. Luckily Diana was very soon able to overcome her depressive phase. She was happy about the baby and pacified it with devotion. Prince Charles was also completely crazy about the little chap, the three grew into a proper family together Diana cared very intensively for her son, despite the nanny. Charles proved a true talent in baby care. Servants happily reported that the heir to the throne had taken a bath with William. Wills was now nine months old and his parents had to make a state visit to Australia. The journey would take six weeks. For Diana such a long separation would be impossible. She insisted on taking William with her. She also explained this to the Queen, who, as expected, categorically denied this wish. Therefore Diana threatened to stay in London with her son. She left no doubts open about fulfilling her threat. A tricky situation for Queen Elizabeth, as she knew that the Australians would be bitterly disappointed if Charles came alone. Diana remained resolute. The Queen permitted it. The Australian visit was a complete success. Storms of excitement and celebration everywhere. Diana even overcame her shyness and could, without pressure, go up to strangers and chat with them.
Even in the same year Diana became pregnant again. Charles reacted to the news with excitement. He obtained complete works about pregnancy and babies. He did not want to hear again the accusation that he could not understand the problems of an expectant mother. He fervently hoped for a cute little girl. But on 15th September 1984 the second son Prince Harry, weighing 3118g, was born.
Diana was an inspirational mother for her sons William and Harry. They always took up first place in her life. Diana loved, protected and cared for her children more than anything. They meant everything to her. Already as a small girl Diana wanted to have at least five children. Later, as "Queen of Hearts", Diana wanted to be the mother of the nation, the mother for the poor and sick of the whole world. William and Harry were her happiness. Diana took on the role of mother with devotion and passion. She wanted her sons to live as normal a childhood as possible, even if that was often difficult to achieve.
Like every young mother Diana played and romped around with her boys, and was very careful that the nanny didn't have too much of an influence. For Diana there was never a question of letting nannies take over the child-raising - something actually routine for aristocratic families. After two dismissals the cheerful Tiggy Legge-Bourke took over the job. And now a true nanny-drama began: Diana insinuated that Tiggy played the role of hostess, flirted with her husband and took over the children. William and Harry truly loved Tiggy, and also today, after Diana's tragic death, she is a very important close contact for the pair. Diana loved having her sons to herself. She spent as much time with them as possible. Diana was a loving mother and best playmate in one person. There was no childish fun that she had not joined in with : roller skating on the long corridors in Kensington Palace, jellybaby eating competitions, log flume rides or dressing-up as ghosts using bedsheets. Sometimes the three even secretly annoyed the old servants by always hiding certain objects. Prince Charles was not always excited by the boisterous games in his house. He insisted that his sons should be made familiar with their future duties as soon as possible. This included discipline, order, first-class manners and also sobriety. Especially William should be raised after kingly principles. After all, the heir to the throne saw him as one day being his future heir. Charles supported a strict upbringing, as a four-year-old he had already had a private teacher and several nannies. As Diana's view of child raising, education and childhood was so different, there was often friction between the married couple. Charles wanted his sons in any case to be under the care of a private teacher for the first few years. Diana insisted on a public nursery. There William and Harry could play with others of the same age. Naturally the Queen completely agreed with her son, and it was almost a miracle that the pair actually went to a nursery in central London a few times. Later Diana's sons went to the public school of Wetherby and afterwards the Ludgrove public boarding school.
Even when it is natural in high society to send the children to boarding school, it was however a painful parting for Princess Diana. Because she naturally loved to have her children around her when she was alone in the evening in Kensington Palace and felt alone. In June 1991 Prince William was accidentally hit by a golf club held by a fellow pupil at the boarding school. Diana raced to the hospital. William had a fractured skull, difficult contusions had to be operated on immediately. But Charles left the hospital to keep and engagement. The operation lasted 75 minutes. Diana didn't understand how a father how a father could leave his son alone at such a moment. As William awoke she was sitting beside him. Diana's sons were her confidantes. She was not shy of showing her feelings openly and honestly. When Diana once sat crying on the loo, having shut herself in, and did not want to come out again, William pushed Kleenex tissues under the door to his mother. He crouched down by the bathroom door and spoke to her. Somehow he nearly always managed to get her to come out. And then he took her up lovingly in his little arms. Diana avoided criticising Charles. She also didn't mention his affair with Camilla. But she couldn't hide her tears from the children. They certainly noticed much about their mother's unhappiness. Diana always had a bad conscience about this. She knew only too well how much children's spirits suffer when their parents argue. She wanted to make it better, to save her children all their concern. Diana always had a deep concern for her youngest. He was a sensitive child, so vulnerable and quiet. Harry often spent the day dreaming, whilst William was a proper roughneck. He could be loud and wild, but also conceal a lot of things. His younger brother liked to have a cuddle. There are innumerable photos which show Diana seeking body contact with Harry. Once she strokes his hair, then she takes him by the arm, or by the hand. She always had the feeling that she had to protect him. Harry was pampered by Diana. It was her way of relieving his sadness over the broken home. With William, her beloved older son, Diana behaved differently. He was her ally, her interlocutor and advisor. When a scandal broke out in the press, she drove to his school and discussed everything with him. She explained what had happened to William, and begged for understanding. Also when it handled delicate things like the Camilla tape, the James Hewitt book, or the "octopus conversation". These must have been dreadfully difficult moments in Diana's life! And it comforted her to know how concerned William was about her wellbeing.
Diana was a devoted mother. But it would be completely wrong to presume that Charles was a bad father. He also loved his sons and tried to make their lives as carefree as possible. He just had a different way with children. Charles couldn't give them the same tenderness as Diana. The source for this certainly laid in his childhood. As a small boy he was not allowed to show any feelings. And so it is no miracle that he wanted to raise William and Harry as proper men. Charles went hunting or fishing with them. He was proud when they caught a hare or had good grades at sport. Charles clapped his oldest on the back with a wink, as he was caught at 14 with a bottle of champagne on school grounds, and his first sexual contact with girls was talked about. He spent a part of the school holidays with his sons in Scotland, undertook long hikes and explained the beauties of nature to them. Diana preferred to fly to distant lands with William and Harry. The children always had fun with their mother: swimming in the Caribbean, water skiing in the Mediterranean, snowball fights in Switzerland. During the holidays the boys were allowed to do everything, but above all to be children. They were allowed to eat hamburgers from the packaging, read comics, play with other boys in the hotel. And this all meant a lot, when one had been born into royalty!
At home in London or also in the elite boarding school Eton they have to wear special armbands, which are tiny locating devices. In the case of a kidnapping the police can tell at once where the children of the Heir to the Throne are. It is unimaginable how great the loss of their beloved mother is to William and Harry. The picture of how they followed their mother's coffin with empty expressions remains in the world's memory forever. And one thing is certain: if Diana had experienced that her heart would have been broken. She was always so concerned about keeping the darker side of life away from her sons. Unfortunately Diana couldn't prevent the breakdown of her family. On the 28th August 1996 the divorce with Prince Charles was finalized. She never wanted this conclusive step. She wanted to remain married solely for her two sons, they should not have to become the product of a broken home. The negotiations with the lawyers ran with difficulty. Naturally it was about money. But not just that. She fought like a lioness over her children. Naturally she knew that the Queen of England would always have a voice in their upbringing. But she was the mother, she didn't want to clear the field without stipulating her requirements. The result did not satisfy the Princess, but more was not to be achieved: Diana was made a divorcee, to a mother with joint custody of her sons William and Harry. She would be allowed to spend 57 days in the year alone with the children.

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