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C is for...candor
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Monday, 20 March 2006
seafood disability quotes
doug: i don't know if i should get the (something) fish sandwich or the salmon
erick(who doesn't eat any seafood): oooh get the salmon!
*we all look at him to see if he was being sarcastic*
erick: what! just cuz i don't eat seafood doesn't mean it doesn't sound good! *in distress* i mean i wish i did eat it because then i could eat everything! & i could go to any restaurant i wanted!
me: geez you make is sound like a disability



doug to erick: want to try some salmon?
erick: ok i will pick some w/ my clean fork & smell it & if i don't want it i will give it back to you
*smells it*
erick: i don't want it
*hands it to doug but doug just eats it off the fork & it looks like erick is feeding him*
*doug pretends to be girly & bats his eyes & gets all shy & smiley*
*erick & i laugh*
prashant: what'd he do!
*doug repeats towards prashant*
prashant: ok now that i've seen it, i don't want to see it ever again...


....

& i apologize to di & chanda for my more & more frequent ramblings:)

....

& this week i will have to be courageous to see if things will be forever imaginary or a reality

& for the sake of my sanity i will assume the first

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 8:40 PM PST
Updated: Monday, 20 March 2006 8:53 PM PST
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Tuesday, 14 March 2006
new quotes!
in physics class (the prof already warned us he is easily distracted)
*facing board & writing & lecturing*
1st time:
*crinkling of chips bag*
(without turning around & interrupting himself)
"& someone's eating chips & it's making me hungry because i didn't eat lunch*
(continues w/ lecture having never turned around)

2nd time:
*cell phone ringing*
(w/o turning again & interrupting his derivation)
"& that person really needs to get a less boring ringtone"
(continues)



in physics discussion
gsi: so when magnets were first discovered they were called "kissing stones" because they thought each stone was attracted to a particular other stone, but then they found out it was a lot more promiscuous than that....



erick & doug's apt when i wasn't there
erick (to alex): so why were you drinking beer while we were here doing our 180!?
jon: cuz it's alex?



erick got a new car but only got the owner's manual & keys so far...
*holding the key & shaking it*
erick: it feels so useless! i just want to stick it in something. i just want to stick it in something & turn it on!!
me: we're talking cars now here, right?
erick: well i guess both...[jk]



last semester in 190D
one day this girl who will remain unnamed was sitting in front of us & her thong was showing & it said "sexy" in beads & gareth put his planner standing up in front of his view to not get distracted
gareth: at the APM dinner, i told ramteen & [the girl] about it & ramteen said "wow i didn't realize so much stuff happened in my class that i didn't see"


from studying:
Pa-hoe-hoe! Pa-hey-hey!
Playa lake
A-a!



......

i've come to realize that i'm more in love with the image than the reality of that image
& if it never became a reality i would be more sad that the image was broken than over the actual occurrence

but that's not to say i don't care about the image becoming a reality...it would be a happy surprise

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 11:10 PM PST
Updated: Tuesday, 14 March 2006 11:10 PM PST
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Thursday, 9 March 2006
bday (forgot to talk about)
this year's was the best bday i've had in a long time

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 10:20 PM PST
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Wednesday, 8 March 2006
quotes (remembered some more)
when erick was driving us home from class one night
erick: aren't you guys glad you don't need to walk home in this rainstorm?
jon & me: (simultaneously by accident) we love you, erick


in ieor 170
prof: what things do you do that require all your senses [to be at attention]
student: driving
erick: *whispers* sex?
gareth: sex...with the light on


in sonoma w/ an aston martin in front of us
erick: i'd have sex w/ that car.....twice

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 9:12 PM PST
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Monday, 6 March 2006
quotes for this week
on the car ride back from Corte Madera

doug: so this one time in boy scouts
erick: you got raped?
doug: no....in one of the cars all the boys fell asleep & so the chaperone driver drove to the edge of the freeway & started honking & screaming & everyone woke up & thought they were going to die
erick: & then they got raped?


at Cheesecake Factory

doug: well...i was born with three balls!
erick: & then one turned out to be his penis


at Cafe Milano 170 meeting

jon: it's sad to think that every 5 seconds there will only be an equal amount of beards as there are before those 5 seconds
doug: or less
jon: yes!
doug: so one day there will be no beards? *confused*
jon: it's not like the opposite of entropy!


in Sonoma on the Barrel Tasting Tour
getting in the car w/ Walk the Line soundtrack on after the first winery & every one thereafter

erick: geez! this music keeps getting more & more exciting!


at the Restoration Hardware meeting
senior vp of sales: do you guys have time?
jon: we're cal students on a friday...of course we do...better yet...we're cal engineers on a friday...we definitely do


there were so many good quote but my mind is drawing a blank...:(


Posted by blog/c_is_for at 12:08 AM PST
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Tuesday, 21 February 2006
& the birthday bitterness begins
i really truly thought this year would be different...

i actively tried to by telling chanda my ideas & she carried it out...but it really was never her problem

every year i am reminded that my good friends are scarce & that i really am not cared for the same way i care for them

i called my mom & i told her i'm starting to get sad over this whole birthday thing again & before i began to elaborate she said "of course, because you always do so much for other people...you make things...you buy things...& you got out of your way to make them feel good & people just don't do that back" "yea...i know" was all i could say

i never told chanda about my annual bitterness because she always tried & i didn't want her to feel bad...i reminded her of the really bad mac & cheese birthday when we watching eurotrip & "friends" told me how annoying my bday was because now they had all this work to do even though they didn't even go out to dinner w/ me & i "used" up to 2 hrs of their time at most

it makes me treasure those that care for me...which isn't a bad thing! i thank them for everything they do & i would do anything for them

i know p had said that i always made it seem like the way i treated was the the right way & there was no other way..it always made me so angry because i never want to seem like/let people think i think i am better than other people...

but now i realize that i don't care if that is the case because my way really is the right way

any friend that makes another friend feel bad because they disregard their feelings or just doesn't care enough to care is NOT a friend

they are NOT worthy of that title

i hate to be a b, but they are especially not worthy of being my friend

because in reality i don't ask for very much for what i give in return

i just expect that they will ask once in a while how i am & one day a year they will say "happy birthday"

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 11:31 PM PST
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Friday, 17 February 2006
random quotes update-microwaves & bits
in physics yesterday...
prof: your mom always told you to never put metal in the microwave, so let's see if that's true
*puts metal spoon in microwave*
(nothing happens)
prof: let's try a fork
(nothing happens)
prof: now let's try a cd!
(glows a sparkly blue light)
prof: now there is no reason you shouldn't try this at home......granted you are sane about it


in erick's profile:
friend: I made the cutest cupcakes last night...all valentines-y with pink and red and white heart-shaped sprinkles
erick: pretty
friend: then I threw them at all the couples that walked by
erick: hahahah that would have been funny
friend: um, I didn't say I was kidding...and yes, it was funny


farzad, chanda, & satra have this thing where they only say the first syllable of the word for the main word in the sentence (eg, let's go to the lib! or i'm hungs...or eww how ugs) so i told them the cupcake story...
farzad: wow she's bits...& that could be bitter or bitch


after the iie officer meeting...
alex: so you guys (jon, doug, & i) want rides?
jon: well sure that'd be nice
alex: well like erick..i figured whoever drives in in charge of taking the rest of the posse home
jon: how erick of you




& for a certain person that reads this...

i promise

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 8:40 PM PST
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Wednesday, 15 February 2006
water
ok so i'm not obsessed about horoscopes or anything, but sometimes i do find truth in them

i am every bit like my pisces profile

& like fish i have a strong affinity to water

in recent days i find myself escaping to another place when i'm in my shower

i wash myself clean of the days occurences & thoughts

& my mind is truly clear

& unfortunately it is a sad sad version of me

i've been pretty apathetic to everything around me

but in there i realize that i'm really not...i really do care & i'm really hurting inside

i just spent 45 minutes in the shower just standing there occasionally leaning against the tile wall to cry

i stood there until my skin was red from the hot water & my fingers & toes were wrinkly

last time i said to myself, i don't feel so badly when i cry in the shower because i feel like i'm just trying to blend in...

i don't feel the warmth of my tears rolling down my face & it's ok

i realized that everytime i go through something painful sometimes it's not really the something but the fact that i find myself alone & that my friends aren't there to support me & maybe they're right maybe i don't open up enough but why i hesitate to open up is because it has never gotten much of a result/response...& i know i shouldn't be so demanding perhaps & maybe i just want people to act like i do which i seem to deem as right...i just want my friends to be there when i need them & in reality they never really are there for me like i am for them & that is an ongoing problem for me...maybe i just give to much or maybe i just demand too much...i guess in the end it doesn't really matter

as i stood there with the water making my fingers wrinkle i wondered if i really would be standing there all my life washing away the pain & sorrow by myself everytime, growing old

& i guess i don't know

......

i was watching the end of sex in the city & carrie brought up with her bf that the relationship wasn't working...but while sitting in jury duty she realized that she wasn't ready to break up & that night he arrived at the door with flowers & said "i know our relationship isn't going well, but i'm willing to work on it" she hugged him, incredibly happy...the next morning she woke up to an empty bed & on her computer was a post it that said "i just can't do it--don't hate me." she hit the flower vase which scattered everything onto the floor & the episode ended

i felt her pain.

......

everytime things get like this is remember this quote i marked when i read it summer of freshman year in english class from "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway:

"It was awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing."

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 12:21 AM PST
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Tuesday, 14 February 2006
st. valentine's day
Mood:  hug me
i started out the day fine

but as i left for class after pe i felt so sick..physically

& then as i walked through campus i saw more girls than normal dressed up...satin outfits..a lot of pink & reds & high heels

i kind of looked at them w/ disgust & a tinge of jealousy

i began to think...

i realize that lot of people find valentine's day to be commercialized but that wasn't really my thought...

my thought was velentine's day was really more of a day that pissed of single people more than it was special for couples

of all the things people have done for me that made me feel loved or special..none of them were on valentine's day...in fact valentine's day fesitivites are so forced that i don't see much thought or love in the entire process

it's a day that people need the corporate world to pump out corny things to give your significant other

& the people that buy them are people that never could put into words what they wanted to say...

it almost makes it less sincere & these things are bought simply because they know that is what he/she wants to hear...

where is the love in that?

i went through most of the day apathetic but somewhat bitter w/ these thoughts in my head...undoing any sincerity of any act of love in my head

but then the day got better as erick & i were drawing faces in class

& then it was the last class of the day for me

& i saw gareth walk in w/ his signature pink shirt and a single orange pink rose...

we all teased him & asked him who the rose was for or who it was from..he grew red

& then he sat next to me & we passed notes & i asked him details

i guessed who the rose was for & i was right

it turns out he met this girl he had a crush on a couple of years ago at a party recently & got her number...he was as excited about a school girl when talking about her & their sense of humor

i gave him some advice on the date & he said that i was partially the reason why he decided to call her up...i smiled

& then i realized maybe all my thoughts were true

but then for just one someone maybe valentine's day is just the reason to give a person enough bravery to pursue something he/she really wants

& then i realized that maybe it wasn't so bad afterall...i just wish i had that kind of inspiration


btw i have a beautiful & smart & awesome valentine!:)

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 7:44 PM PST
Updated: Tuesday, 14 February 2006 7:51 PM PST
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how many does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
i saw this on my cousin michael's wall & i thought it was funny...

CAL: Three. 1 to change the bulb and two to debate about the metaphysical state of the bulb and how its invention has impacted human development.

UCLA: Two. 1 to change the bulb, and another to call their friends at USC and tell them how they changed it just as well and for much cheaper.

UCSD: Five. 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to start smoking weed until the room spins.

UCI: Eleven. 1 to change the bulb and ten to sit around watching because honestly, what else is there to do at Irvine past 10pm??

UCR: Three. 1 to steal the bulb, another to drive the getaway car, and the last to call all his friends to throw the celebration party on a Tuesday night.

UCSB: Seven. 1 to screw the bulb and 6 to screw each other.

UC Davis: Zero. There is no electricity in Davis

UC Merced: Two. One to hold the bulb while the other calls his friend asking for help in figuring out this "new college thing."

UCSC: None. Living in the forest, they see at night by torches and moonlight-damn hippies.

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 12:37 AM PST
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