on the trip to meeting w/ restoration hardware ppl:
jon: the guy that does cookie monster's voice has to rest every other day because it's such a strain on his throat
erick: *imitating cookie monster* a, b, coooooookie!!!
alex: i wonder if his wife asks him to do the voice when they're at it
erick: *imitating cookie monster eating* ahm ahm ahm ahm ahm
physics lecture today:
prof: *after demo'ing static on regular balloons* it's valentine's day soon & i encourage everyone to go out & buy a valentine's day balloon because you can give it to someone & then you can experiment together!
*class laughs (i was laughing cuz it was nerdy)*
prof: NOT LIKE THAT! i meant science experiments. because those balloons are metallic & so it's easier to remove electrons. where are your heads at!
later in the lecture:
prof: there are tiny sparks when you brush your hair. so you should all brush your hair in the dark. also, if you undress in front of a mirror in the dark, especially with nylon clothes, you will see sparks. or what's even more fun is to try that with a friend.
..............
the bottom is on a more serious note
i've been going thru a lot lately...emotionally
from being completely self conscience to feeling confident about things in my life
everyday i have my ups & downs & sadly it seems to be determined by all those around me
i feel so weak right now because i want control of my life again but it seems to keep slipping out of my hands
i will sit there for a few minutes convincing myself that things are ok & that i will be fine & everything will fall into place slowly but surely
i am ok for about an hour after that & then it sets in again
i've been keeping my mind off of things by keeping busy with my usual things...school & job search & clubs
but then i find myself getting angry at being so busy
& there's just no haven to flee to
the majority of the time i just want to cry but i know that solves nothing...but that doesn't stop me
& as i lay crying on my bed this morning i realized how many tears and pain my pillow has seen & i almost felt bad for it
everytime i go through a time like this i realize that my friends are sparse
because the only person i really want to call i need to refrain from calling
& everyone else is just as busy as i am
i know it is not because they aren't good friends because i value my friends at times like these but sometimes it's just hard to bottle things up inside
then there are risks that i want/need to take but i don't think i'm ready
& in reality i don't think i will ever be because i'm already pretty sure that things won't pan out as i want them to
they never have


