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C is for...candor
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Friday, 4 March 2005
girls
so sometimes i find it strange that my best friend is a girl when almost every other friend i have is a guy....

& i don't know....i know i just get along with guys better because of their bluntness & they're just...at least in my experience a hellava lot funnier & fun for that matter...

& it's not that i have anything against girls...though sometimes i feel like i do...maybe it's the sneakiness/bitchiness & maybe it's the competition but i just don't find the girls around me that are acquiantances all that interesting...in fact i find them kind of bland with desire to be competitive when in reality i just don't really care...of course being just acquaintances with them there is always that sense of fakeness & politeness but maybe that comes with the classes i take as well...i don't know...

i just really dislike them at times...

i mean....i guess i don't know them enough to know if they do have lives but i just feel like they don't....

granted i don't have the most exciting life by any means but i'd like to think i live a fulfilling life in my terms...

i mean i know that people don't seek the same thing out of life as i do...& technically i don't fit my major...at least my mind doesn't at times...

& maybe in the end i AM competitive & i'm jealous & that's why i dislike them...eh...i hope that's not it...

i dunno....i just feel like i'm being watched when i'm with girls...i'm sure i do that same freaking thing...but i hate that...

on a constant watch trying to catch a glimpse of their flaws & weaknesses....

reminds me of the last time we went to doug's to study & watched coupling...it was in a bar? & it was the girl's point of view all the girl noticed this beautiful girl in the corner...she looked hot & she was reading too so somewhat intellectual & all the women in the room were looking for a flaw they could call her out on...they saw the price tag on the bottom of her shoe & that was passed through the room...so when it switched to the guy's perspective he told his friend that girl was hot & she automatically said "oh but she has a price tag on her shoe" & he was really confused...

Posted by blog/c_is_for at 8:45 PM PST
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