you know you have been gone from home too long when...
-the onion leaves that sprouted in the fridge are bigger than any of the plants on your balcony
-your mailbox lock no longer works because the mailman tried to jam it too full
-your shaving cream somehow decided to spontaneously explode in your tub and fill it with pink foam
-your gas bill is like $3
-you can't open the garage door because they already changed the code & you have to park on the street
ok that's just a brief list...
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on a bit of a heavier note...
i know that i have said that i do not know many people that continuously think about making themselves a better person the way that i do. every once in a while i need recalibration, but it is a never ending quest to be a near perfect person. drawing and learning from the things i see in others that i like and makng them my own.
but...i wonder if this continual reworking of myself means that i will never be satisfied and content with who i am right now & in that moment. i'd like to think that isn't true, but technically that would make sense. i guess in any moment in time i know i am already a great person & i'm just working on the details. i just need to make sure that this process doesn't prevent me from being happy. sometimes i look too much into what could be better and do not revel long enough in what is already amazing.
different approaches obviously need to be taken for different things. for me, i am ok with the fact that personally i strive for more. but when it comes to others, i need to not worry about what was, what it could've been, or what could happen in the future. i should always just focus on what it is right now. otherwise, there will always be something to worry about even when nothing is wrong.
and with that, i will remind myself that right now everything is wonderful. it is perfect. and i couldn't imagine it to be any other way.
Updated: Saturday, 18 August 2007 5:35 PM PDT
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