So You Want To Be A Dog Breeder?
So You Want To Be A Dog Breeder?
by Louise Owens
SO, you want to be a dog breeder, HUH??
Well, early this AM, my peaceful slumber is disturbed by the SCREAMING from the kitchen... OH, NO! what could be wrong.. is one of the kids hurt??? I leap from the bed.. but my feet never hit the floor.. instead I land on one of the 4 adult dogs resting happily by the bed, totally unaware and unconcerned about the riot down stairs.
I suddenly realize that the Cries I am hearing are NOT distress.. but rather Anger.. it is time to get up and take care of the puppies!
So I bid farewell to my warm comfortable bed.. a piece of furniture that I need to spend some "quality" time with soon so that we may become reacquainted. We have seen precious little of each other in the past 7 weeks!
As I make my way to the top of the stairs, I am hoping for the pleasant smell of fresh brewed coffee. What I am greeted with instead is a most horrible odor. Oh, yeah... I have 9 Puppies in my kitchen!
I enter the kitchen to the happy faces of the gang looking over the top of the pen. Little angels. The lot! "Oh, mom, we are so very happy to see you!"
I must pour that cup of coffee before I do anything else. Thank God for timers on coffeepots! I take that first GULP knowing that the second is a long way off. I put the gate across the kitchen doorway to confine the destruction that is about to take place to one room... and then.. I... RELEASE THE HOUNDS!
Nine little bundles of joy come stampeding out of the pen.. covered in shavings, poop and pee... what a fun night they have had. Toys have been rolled through the .. well.. you know. The water bowl is full of shavings, the bed is a disaster.. and the rest is beyond description.
The kids, meanwhile, have begun their job of trashing the kitchen. Now...how is it that those same children who have totally covered everything in their pen with puppy poop are now doing it all over my kitchen floor... there are piles and puddles everywhere within a matter of moments! I hurry to clean them up before the GAME begins...the Game???? well POOP & SLIDE of course!
I begin my clean up of the pen,.. but, the kids are not happy to be outside the pen playing. They need to HELP MOM. So... they are back in with me, shredding paper as I try to roll it up. Handing me toys, chewing my ankles, running between my feet as I try to walk.
untying my shoes.. and peeing on my feet.
OK, I can't work like this anymore, so I shut them out of the pen while I clean it...FINE! They'll just continue to poop & pee all over the kitchen floor... they'll lean on the side of the pen and SCREAM the entire time I am in there cleaning because they want to be with MOM.
They chew the broom... they knock over the bag of wet papers, and they continue to Trash the Kitchen!..
Finally the pen is cleaned.. new beds are put down, and fresh papers and shavings are ready to be investigated.
I let the kids back in...and they proceed to spread the new fresh shaving to their clean bed.. and then to track them all over the rest of the kitchen.. all the while I am trying to keep up with the poops and pees that continue on.
Then I go to the food dish.. SILENCE.. I turn and see 9 of the most ANGELIC FACES staring up at me.. "mom.. we are such GOOOOOOD little children" .. "Can we eat now??"
I fix 3 bowls of food. As I attempt to carry them back to the pen, they stampede again to get back there and be the first to eat.
I set the dishes down, and the Little ANGELS begin to eat.. I close them in the pen, and while they eat, I begin to clean up the rest of the kitchen. By the time this is accomplished, the kids are finished eating, and I pick up the bowls while they proceed to mess all over the new clean pen... after all.. "what goes in ..MUST come OUT!" I pick up the new piles, and the children retire to the bed for a nap...
Hehehehehe... shhhhh don't tell them...I put "sleepy puppy" in their food!
As they sleep.. I look at the calendar where I have begun to count the days till they go to their new homes... 8 more days.. till the first one leaves.. well, only 1 gone means about 35 less piles to pick up!
I kneel and pray to the god of SUN that she may shine on us soon.. so that the little Darlings may soon go OUTSIDE.. after week of rain.. at least for a few minutes each day!
Now 2 hours later I think.. I can finally sit a drink the rest of that cup of coffee... cold though it may be... I head for the living room.. to my chair, and the paper... but ALAS.. it is not to be... for I hear the gentle whine of the BIG dogs feeling neglected.. reminding me that they have yet to be FED!
SO.... YOU WANT TO BE A DOG BREEDER, HUH????
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