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"THE ROCK N ROLL STORY"

One day a barber was just about to go on a lunch break when his telephone at his shop rang. His name was Pink Floyd, but most people just called him "Floyd" or "Floyd the Barber."

"Hello, Strawberry Fields Barber Service, how may I help you?" Answered Floyd. He had never gotten a call before lunch.

"Yes," said a deep voice. Floyd thought it sounded like his friend Jimi. "Is Floyd there? This is his friend Jimi."

"Jimi, how is it going? Have you seen Joe around? How are Tina and Ike going? Are they still on that river trip?" Asked Floyd. "Everything is going superb for me," said Jimi sadly, "but Ike and Tina are considering getting a divorce, or at least splitting up. Their river trip was a disaster. Tina blames Ike for trying to drown her, and Ike denies it all. Personally, I believe Tina. That is irrelevant right now, though. Joe… he thinks his old lady has been cheating on him, again. Knowing that woman, she probably is. Anyway… I was just calling to see if you would like to go to lunch with Joe, Jim, and me, if you aren’t too busy. I decided to call now because I figured you were getting ready to go on a break."

Just as Jimi finished that sentence, Floyd turned off the neon open sign to his shop and waved goodbye to Alexander, another barber who worked there that was also going out to lunch.

"Good timing Jimi. I’d love to go to lunch with you and Jim. How bout' swinging over to my shop and we’ll decide where to go and what to eat and all that."

‘Sounds great," said Jimi anxiously. "Ill just pick up Jim, then I’ll be there. Ten minutes, tops. See ya then. Later man."

In the meantime, Floyd decided to check the schedules. Ironically, he had add and hour to his lunch break today. He didn’t even have to work tomorrow; he had already put in all of his hours.

Just then, Christian Dior, one of Floyd’s colleagues, walked in from his lunch break. He flickered on the open sign and got ready for business again.

"Already back from lunch? I haven’t even gone yet!" Said Floyd. "I am still waiting for my buds Jimi and Jim to come and pick me up."

"Hmm…," said Christian in his heavy French accent, "They be here soon. Don’t you worry any. Where are the scissors? I need scissors."

"I put them in the third storage closet, Christian." Said Floyd. "Thanks Floyd, I have silly habit of looking for scissors in first storage containment."

A few minutes later, a black limousine with tinted windows pulled up in front of the shop. A man with long black hair got out of the long car. He was wearing a red shirt with gold tassels on the shoulders. Even though his face was covered, everyone knew it was one of their most famous customers, Michael Jackson.

"Hello," said Michael in his high, Mickey Mouse voice. "I am here for my hair cut. I am pleased to see you all."

Floyd was relieved that right after that a purple limousine with very loud rock music playing pulled up to the barber shop.. He didn’t like Michael much; he was kind of scared of him, actually. He was so weird!

Floyd went outside to greet his friends. He saw Jim walking out of the huge parking lot towards the street.

"I am the lizard king! I can do anything!" yelled Jim. "I can make the blue cars stop in their tracks!" Just then, 6 blue cars stopped. Floyd, and Jimi were laughing extremely hard. They knew he was reciting one of his famous poems.

Jim waved bye to the people in the blue cars and told them thanks. He walked toward the purple limousine.

"So how much did you pay those people?" Floyd barely got that sentence out, he was laughing so hard. That got Jimi going. He was laughing so hard he was crying. It made Jim laugh hard too.

After they had all calmed down, Jim replied to the question. "Ten bucks each." He said is very seriously. They all exchanged glances then started laughing again.

"So where are we going to eat?" Asked Jim. "I am so hungry. I wanna go to a fancy restaurant and order a lot of food, that way I can take it home and have it later."

Jim looked at his watch. It was a very different watch, if that is what you would like to call it. The band was woven out of some sort of cotton. It was very colorful. The face of it had a picture of a chair on it.

"What time do you gotta get back to work, Floyd? It is 1:45 now." Stated Jim. "Ahhh!" screamed Floyd. "I have to go back to work in 15 minutes! Maybe I could just take the rest of today off. I didn’t realize how long we were laughing and talking about where to eat."

Floyd went into the barber shop and talked to the other barbers to see if they minded if he took the rest of the day off so he could be with his friends. All of them agreed and didn’t mind. Floyd was gracious.

He went outside and told his buddies the great news. They were all excited, too.

"So, there is just one thing we have left to decide." stated Jim. "Where are we going to eat? Is anyone actually hungry? Personally, I’d just like to bum around town…downtown. ‘Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city. Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty, How can you lose? The lights are much brighter there, you can forget all your troubles there. So go downtown!"

Everyone started laughing at Jim’s attempt to sing the song, "Downtown."

"I think that we should go to… CBGB’s tonight!" shouted Jimi. "What a cool idea! Let’s ask a bunch of people to meet us there, like Johnny and Courtney, all of the ‘gang’!" said Floyd. "Okay, but what do we do till then?" asked Jim. "Why don’t we go eat something, then go walk around ‘downtown.’ Sand Jimi. "Let’s get Mexican food."

So off they went, to "La Casa," or the house. It was pretty close to the barber shop, so they didn’t have a long drive. They arrived the same time as the lunch crowd. They had forgotten how popular the restaurant was. They decided to walk around the neighborhood while they waited for their table. They had a two hour wait.

"It has been a long time since we chilled like this." Said Jimi. "Yeah, I know what you mean. Too bad Joe isn’t with us." Said Floyd. "I really miss that guy. Too bad his ‘old lady’ has been cheating on him, again. She is no good. I don’t know why he digs her so much." Said Jimi.

A few minutes later the realized they were in Joe’s neighborhood. Ironically, they saw him walking down the street. He had a gun in his hand.

"Hey Joe. Where are you going with that gun in your hand?" Asked Jimi. Joe appeared not to hear what Jimi had said. "I said, Hey Joe! Where are you going with that gun in your hand?" Said Jimi, again. "I’m going down to shoot my old lady. You know I caught her messing around with another man. Said Joe. "What?!" exclaimed Jimi. "I’m going down to shoot my old lady. I’m tired of her messing around with another man." Joe said, as if trying to prove something.

"Joe," said Floyd, "You have to be kidding. I can’t believe you. Just break up with her! She isn’t worth it! She is very terrible for you. She lies, and cheats; plus she is an awful influence on you. She is vindictive."

Joe mumbled something to them and kept walking.

"Do you think he’ll do it?" asked Jim. "I dunno." Said Floyd. "I hope not. I am afraid I gave him more reasons to shoot that witch. If he does, at least someone got a crack at her. She treated my brother really bad. Poor guy."

They continued walking down the sidewalk. As they approached the street corner, the sidewalk got incredibly narrower. A few yards down the road the realized that the sidewalk was being repaired. Construction men were working very frantically to get it repaired. Floyd heard one of the workers say it was 3:00. That was the time their reservation was. He mentioned it to Jim and Jimi and they ran frantically back towards the restaurant.

Some of the construction men mentioned that the three men looked incredibly familiar. No one really thought much of it though.

When they arrived, they were seated very quickly. Fifteen minutes passed before a waiter came and asked them what they wanted to drink. Then another ten passed before their drinks came.

"I sure could go for some nachos right now." Said Floyd. "Not me," said Jim, "I want some enchiladas."

Finally, after about two hours of waiting, their food came. They ate it quickly, paid, and then got out of the restaurant.

"Man, it’s like we should have made reservations a year ago for that place!" Said Jimi. "I know. Should we have mentioned to them who we were? Maybe our service would have been faster." Floyd stated.

They started walking toward the purple limousine. "Let’s walk around the rest of the day." Said Jimi. "Maybe we’ll see some of our friends around this area. Doesn’t Dexter live this way? And D’arcy? We know Joe does." Said Floyd.

"How do you think Joe is doing?" said Jim. "He was really mad at his old lady."

They started walking opposite of the way they walked when they were waiting for their table at La Casa.

"Isn’t this Dexter’s neighborhood?" asked Jim. "I recognize that bent stop sign from when I hit it when I was driving Jimi’s limousine…" Jim trailed off. "You were driving my purple limo?! Without me?! And you crashed?! You know how I like a good crash." Said Jimi. That comment he had made got them laughing again.

Everyone that saw them on the street realized the looked so familiar. Pretty soon, they were close to Dexter’s house. Their friend Kurt was sitting on Dexter’s porch with and acoustic guitar singing a very humorous song.

 

Meanwhile…

Kim Gordon and her friend Shirley were thinking about going to CBGB’s that night also. Shirley and Kim had been friends forever. They met in Ireland while Kim and her husband Thurston were on a tour with their band, Sonic Youth.

"Kim, if we go to CBGB’s," said Shirley, "maybe we’ll see Jimi or Dexter or maybe even Joe! We haven’t seen that fellow in a long time. I wonder how he and his girlfriend are doing."

"I guess we should go… but we should ask Suzanne to come. She loves CBGB’s. I am sure she would be happy to see everyone again." Said Kim. "Cool! I miss Suzanne. Let’s call her now." Said Shirley.

They dialed Suzanne’s phone number.

"Hello?" said Suzanne. "Hey Suzanne! This is Kim. Want to come to CBGB’s tonight with Shirley and me? We think that Jimi and everyone are going up there tonight." Said Kim. "Hey! Sure! I’d love to. I talked to Jimi a few days ago and he said that Jim and he were going to ask Floyd to lunch. He said they figured Floyd would take the day off if they did and they would end up going to CBGB’s. I was going to ask you all if you wanted to come tonight. Good idea!" said Suzanne.

TO BE CONTINUED