How Will I be Treated by Koreans?

The Koreans that you meet and befriend will often bend over backwards for you -sometimes it's a little overbearing, but it's well-intended (and good Korean friends are worth making!). Koreans on the street (i.e. strangers), however, are a different story altogether. Being a caucasian, you will be stared at. If you are tall, you will be stared at. If you are overweight by any margin, you will be stared at. If you have blonde hair, red hair, long hair, curly hair, or no hair, you will be stared at. Do you have tattoos and piercings? Yep, you guessed it, you're going to be stared at. If you are inadverently standing in someone's way, they will simply push you out of their way and not think twice about it. Koreans in the grocery store will look through your cart and bags to see what kind of food you're buying. School children - even high-school kids - will get no end of thrills simply by calling, "Hel-LOoooo!" and giggling as you walk by. The ajuma at the local corner store will occasionally give you extra eggs (or whatever), or she will take one brand of snack/drink out of your hand and replace it with something different (supposedly better). If you stand around and look lost for long enough, someone will come ask you if you need help, and may well go out of his/her way to lead you in the right direction. Koreans that you meet for the first time will tell you - to your face - that you are "too tall", "too fat", "too skinny", "very handsome/pretty", and so on. Heaven forbid you should get a pimple, because Koreans will be the first to point it out and ask you about it. Taxi drivers will pass you by as you're standing on the corner waving frantically at them, and more often than not it will take two or three (or more) attempts to explain where you want to go.

Speaking of taxis, one driver will rip you off because you're foreign; another will give you a discount for speaking English with him. If you are carrying a heavy bag and there are no seats left on the bus, someone who is seated may offer to hold your belongings until you reach your stop. Nobody will ever rise to give you their seat, and if you should give your seat to an elderly Korean, the surprise and shock on the faces of those around you will be worth it. Speaking of buses, taking a ride on a Korean bus is just as good as anything Disneyland has to offer; as soon as you step on, find yourself something to hang on to and don't let go!

As for "harassment" of foreign women, well, I have heard from female co-workers and friends that older Korean women (known as "ajuma") do not generally like western women. Korean men ("adjoshi") are known to "hit on" western women, sometimes aggressively, depending on their level of inebriation. Foreign men with Korean girlfriends have been harassed by Korean men, most often verbally, but sometimes physically.

My personal favorite pet peeve about life in Korea is the "no substitution" policy at restaurants:

- "Can I have the Mexican sampler platter, but with chicken quesadillas instead of beef?"
- "Not possible."
- "How about the chicken Caeser salad without the chicken?"
- "Yes, but it's the same price."
- "I see that you serve Coke with the lunch 'set menu'; can I order something else and BUY a bottle of Coke?"
- "No."

I could go on, but you should get the general idea. This is life in Korea, and it's not always going to be a bed of roses. You ARE going to be faced with these kinds of situations, and you WILL have to deal with them, one way or another. Bring a sense of humour!

Is Korea Really that "Backwards"?

As I mentioned, Korea does not have the same "PC values" as our so-called "civilized" western nations, and is a good 20 or 30 years behind in a lot of regards. Take all that PC crap, pack it away in a box and leave it behind. Your "western sensibilites" aren't going to hold much water with the locals once you arrive. Be prepared.

Korea has long a history of being an isolationist nation and of being exclusionary to foreigners, and those sentiments echo to this day. For example, try reading the English-language newspapers (The Korea Herald, The Korea Times). They shy away from printing negative things about the goings-on inside Korea, and are constantly pushing the political buttons regarding the ongoing US/S.Korea/N.Korea situation. Murders, rapes, and other such violent crimes are rarely reported in the English media, unless they involve a foreigner. When the Korean won started dropping in early 2001, the aforementioned papers stopped printing the exchange rates on the front page. I guess some stories just aren't "acceptable" for print...

Try to remember, for all intents and purposes, modern-day Korea is really less than 30 years old - in 1970, the government here was virtually a police state. Throughout the 1970's there were numerous pro-democracy rallies and riots which drew violent and brutal reactions from the police. (Indeed, to this day you will find that Koreans are reluctant to ever challenge people in authority, be it their bosses, a security guard, or even the manager of a restaurant if a meal is unsatisfactory.) Riots such as these continued sporadically even into the 80's (ask your older Korean acquaintances about the Kwangju masssacre...) when more "democratic" governments were finally elected. "Democracy" and "globalization" are really relatively new concepts in Korea, and they're still trying to figure it all out.

Admittedly, this really is far too succinct, and some will probably take issue with my overly simplistic summary of Korean history and culture, but part of your Korean experience will be to learn about these things for yourself. Just keep in mind that Korea has changed much in a short time, and the growing pains are evident everywhere. What you take away from your experiences there is up to you.

So long as you don't breath in that toxic cloud of diesel and DDT ("mosquito spray") you see above, yes, Korea is generally pretty safe - just close your doors and windows when you hear him coming! Some vendors in the smaller shopping centers close their stalls by simply wrapping sheets around them - no doors, no locks. I've seen people standing on a busy streetcorner counting large amounts of money they have just withdrawn from ATM machines, and nobody even bats an eye. I've seen little old ladies walk into a bank and pull STACKS of cash out of their purses. I have personally carried several hundred dollars worth of currency for days at a time; I've carried my wallet tucked into the mesh side-pocket of my backpack and didn't think twice about it. Getting "mugged" is a pretty rare thing. There are exceptions, of course, and one should use caution wherever one travels.

This isn't to say that there is no crime in Korea, that would be an outright and unwarranted lie. I've also seen street fights, heard stories of break-ins and attempts to enter people's apartments... but I've never felt uneasy about walking the streets after dark, which is more than could be said about a lot of other major cities in the world.

Recently there has been quite a lot of anti-American sentiment, and numerous rallies / protests aimed at getting the US military out of the country. If you see a demonstration, turn around and leave the area. Don't stand around and gawk, don't hang around to see what the fuss is all about. It may be something completely harmless or unrelated, but why take a chance? Most of these rallies will be announced on AFN TV (Armed Forces Network) a day or so in advance, so you should know to avoid those areas.

You will probably, at some point, run into someone who just has a hate-on for foreigners. Stay calm, don't argue, and don't fight! If you're on a bus/subway, get off at the next stop and wait for the next one. Someone might follow you around for a while; keep your cool, and try to stay in / go to a crowded place. Try to find a police officer or a security guard. While this is rare, and has never happened to me personally, I do know a few people who have had this kind of thing happen to them. It's scary, but things rarely get violent. Just keep cool, use your head, and don't provoke anything. If a foreigner gets into a fight with a Korean, nobody is going to care WHO started it, nobody is going to come to YOUR aide, and the police will probably take YOU away, even if you were just defending yourself.

How Do I Deal With My Boss?

Korea is very much a society of "give and take". Your boss may very well ask you to help out with some side projects, such as students' plays or speech contests, and you may even be asked to come in on a Saturday or two to help with such things. In most cases, with most GOOD bosses, what comes around goes around. Remember, you will very likely have to ask your boss for a favour someday too (sick days are often seen as "favours"), and they WILL remember how you behaved when they came to you for help. A prime example is getting holiday time, which is a frequent issue. Yes, your contract states that you may take xx # of days holidays with the boss' approval or at their discretion outright, but you may be in for some wrangling to get those days that you really really want. If you're the only foreigner at a school, it becomes that much harder. In many cases, the school will close for a week in the summer (at the director's discretion), and those days will count as part of your holidays. That may not seem entirely fair, but that's just the way of things. Choose your battles. If you wail and moan about every little thing, you won't be in a good position to ask for something that you want later.

But What About the Contract?

Most Koreans generally think of contracts as merely a flexible guide, if not just a neccessary inconvenience to get out of the way just to get a native-English speaker to their school. Contracts just don't carry the same kind of weight that they do in the "west". Yes, it is a legally binding document and both sides should be held accountable to uphold their respective ends of the bargain. But what is equally important in the Korean business world is the relationship between two parties and respect for elders and superiors. This flies in the face of the core beliefs of many foreigners who have delusions of their contract being an iron-clad document sworn to before The Almighty Himself, but it's a fact of life in Korea and one should be prepared to deal with it. When it's crunch time, the interpersonal relationship between you and your boss matters every bit as much as your contract. This is less about sucking up than it is about the concept of "saving face", which is extremely important in Korean culture. I've said it already, but it's worth repeating: What goes around, comes around. You will witness this time and time again in Korea, and not just at the office.

Are You Finished Yet?

Well, I know this is a lot to take in all at once, but you've got to do your homework. Information is power, but only if you use it wisely.

My purpose here is not to blow sunshine up your skirt about what a wonderful worker's paradise Korea is, nor is it to tell you tales of blatant racism and xenophobia to dissuade you from going there. I hope that I have shown some of the good and some of the bad together so that you might make up your own mind.

Don't be too discouraged by all the negative stories that you hear - remember that the various discussion forums are primarily places for people to vent their concerns and to seek help. Take everything you hear and read (including this site) with a large grain of salt. A lot of what you hear is true and has merit, but keep in mind that people who are happy and enjoying their time in Korea (and there are many!) generally don't spend a lot of time in those kinds of job-discussion forums and chat rooms - instead, they're out having fun and enjoying their lives!

If you are prepared, do your homework, and have the right attitude, you will have yourself a pretty good time. For better or for worse, Korea will amaze you.

Thanks to John for the assist!

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