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Learning to Knit

On a scale of one to ten for domesticity, (ten being Martha Stewart) Molly scores a two, and knitting scores about a nine, depending, of course on what you knit. In order to convince Molly that knitting is an activity worthy of her time and attention, there are a number of factors that must be addressed. The first factor would be why the hell should she be seen anywhere resembling public, looking, for all the world, like she wants to be a grandmother? The answer, of course, is camouflage. Throw in a home knit sweater and hat, and even the most die-hard ninja would be difficult to identify without careful inspection. Knitting needles, potential deadly weapons, provide the advantage of being welcome places you canít normally take toe-nail clippers. Finally, knitting provides a convenient source of cozies to disguise any number of interesting weapons from even the most observant guests. Anything wearing a cozy looks about as dangerous as Barbie doll, or a tea party. Despite all the logical convincing arguments applied to why knitting would be a suitable hobby to take up, Molly would most likely need to be coerced (either through the use of deadly force, or vast quantities of money). The woman with the mirrored eyes would never seem completely at home with her knitting needles, no matter how practiced she became, unless, of course she were stabbing someone with them.

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