"So, Mandy didn't take well to you touring?"

"No, she had a fit once she saw the chaos of it all. Nothing can prepare a person for what they experience once they're in the public eye." After shedding those few tears, Nick had calmed down and found himself involved in a heavy conversation with Toria. It was a talk Nick had needed to have with someone for months, but never got around to it. He was too busy thinking about how to please everyone in his life, how to make Mandy happy during most of their relationship.

"She was jealous?"

"Ha! Jealous is not the word. That girl pulled out those eye-daggers for every female fan that was of legal age and over. Once, we were at a promo party. I'd had a little to drink for once in my entire life. When we got back to the hotel Q and I walked right out the limousine and made our way to the door. I was a little looser that night so I was a little friendlier with the fans; giving them a suave smile and blowing kisses. You know normal flirty stuff. Anyhow, she has a cow because I didn't wait for her and once she sees me being unlike myself, all hell broke loose. As soon as she stepped into that hotel, she chewed my ass raw, cursing up a storm as people passed by in the lobby. It was so embarrassing."

"What did you do?"

A sheepish smile crossed Nick's face. "I kept on flirting with the fans through the glass doors. I didn't know what I was doing. All I knew is that I wanted her to shut up."

"If I may say so, you weren't the Nick you'd always projected yourself to be once you went public with your relationship. Well, except for when you were in fights and not sad about it."

Nick's eyes widened a bit in amazement. "Name a time," he challenged.

"Well, how about when you all went on MTV to do the Backstreet Live promo show for Millennium?"

"Was I really acting different?"

"You were friendlier and more hyper; not so shy with the fans."

"It was just my way of getting even, making her more upset. She finally didn't want to put up with it anymore."

"That's what you wanted, right?"

"Yes and no. I wanted to get rid of the irritating things, but I want some kind of companionship."

"It's not a split package, Nick. You have her; you get the imperfections as well." They sat in silence for a moment. "You know, I've always craved the attention and affection of the opposite sex. I yearned for it so much that I would accept any asshole that came along. I'll tell you something. After all the harsh words, hard slaps and forcing of things I realized that being on your own is sometimes safer and wiser than playing a fantasy game."

He understood exactly what she was saying, but it also cut him like a knife. "I take it your relationships haven't been too hot either," he lightly chuckled.

"Honey, I could keep you entertained for days about the list of losers in my life."

"We'll have to set up dates for that then." He closed his eyes and hung his head low, wondering if he had said the right thing.

"Nick Carter actually has days open where he'd have nothing better to do than listen to me whine?"

He looked back up and smirked, a wave of relief washing over his body. "You're a cool girl, Toria. I'd like to talk with you a lot more."

She narrowed her eyes. "Are you guys still going to be in town tomorrow?"

"Yeah, we are. Why?"

"The girls and I have a taping in the afternoon, but have the rest of the day free. Would you want to maybe have another pow wow?"

"Are you asking me out?" he smirked.

"No, I asked you to a private pow wow." Her teeth glistened as she smiled.

"And where would you want this pow wow thing to take place? Neither one of us can get away with going out without looking conspicuous exactly."

"Did anyone ever tell you that you're in danger of becoming anal like your buddy Kevin if you keep up with all this worrying?"

He laughed out loud. "No one can be as anal as him!"

"How about we just order room service here, in your room?"

"Sure, I'm up for that. How about tomorrow at six?"

"I'll be here. It was nice meeting you, Nick. It was very nice." She smiled sweetly as she shook his hand.

"Same here. Can I get one of the guards to escort you out?"

"No need for that. I think I can handle the screaming girls outside. Night." She exited the room with an almost sexual gaze in his direction. Once the door was shut, he instantly fell on the bed behind him and experienced a rush that hadn't entered his body in a long time. It was one he had missed and hoped would stay.