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You may have already heard in part the tale of how Ballad of the Warrior(hereafter BALLAD) came to be; whether you have or not, I shall nevertheless tell it in full now.
Every computer gamer here will no doubt recall Blizzard Entertainment's insanely popular Dungeon RPG game
DIABLO. Many of you may have played it; I have. This was back in the time when I was in Grade 7.
In the grand tradition of English classes, my grade 7 teacher had us write an assortment of poems. Some haiku, limericks, and others went by in a flash (in hindsight, they REALLY sucked). And then it came time to do a poem of a certain length, with a rhyme scheme of some sort. And so I came to write the poem Away from the Light of the Sun(hereafter referred to as AWAY FROM THE LIGHT).
AWAY FROM THE LIGHT was a quantum leap for me. At the time, it was the longest poem I had ever written. Looking back, some of the rhymes were pretty forced, and it wasn't that long- but compared to some limerick about Stone Cold Steve Austin it was gold.
Grade 8 English Honors left me with small artistic developement in poetic regard- I produced little excellent work. I did write one poem- although I recall not whether it was in grade 8 or 9- called To Die for the Emperor. It was one that had to use metaphors or something, anyway, it was good. The language and the whole use of metaphors and rhyme scheme was much better than AWAY FROM THE LIGHT, however I don't know if it survives on my hard drive. Anyway, let's set the scene for the creation of BALLAD.
English 9 honors picked up the pace. The workload was tough, but I learned a lot. Partway through the semester, we all had to do a report on a famous author. For some random reason(possibly his mention in "A Distant Mirror: The Calamitous 14th Century" by Barbara Tuchman), I chose Geoffrey Chaucer. Anyhoo, he wrote a lot of poetry in the form of rhyme royal, that is ababbcc.
Before we begin, let it be known that Archbishop Lazarus, Diablo, Cain the Elder, the Butcher, and Ogden are names and characters created by Blizzard Entertainment. People at Blizzard- you have a problem with this? Tell me and I will rename them.
I asked the innkeep to tell me the story,
Said I, “Ogden, what has happened here?”
As it goes, it was rather gory,
We had to drink a lot of beer,
Then from the church tortured screams I could hear,
I strapped on my shield with little care,
I had to save the townsfolk down there.
As I kicked down the door of the ancient church,
The devastation I was amazed to see,
I must admit My heart gave a lurch,
When a skeleton got up and tried to slay me,
I got out my club and luckily,
I smashed it in half and it fell apart,
But that was but the first thing to haunt my heart.
I came to despise each twisted beast,
That dared to defile this sacred place,
I fought them with vigor, to say the least,
And then I found a quality mace,
Though not with my sword’s deadly grace,
I reaped down reavers with righteousness,
Nothing could cause me fear, unless…
I heard the shout of a dying man,
As his blood pooled crimson in the dark,
He shouted, “Ware the butcher, run while you can!”
I launched off arrows, they flew in an arc,
And true to my skill they found their mark,
I cut off its head, just to be certain,
That it would not get up attack me again.
I worked my way down to a catacomb,
Where townsfolk would go, their dead to bury,
But now walking corpses and goat-demons roam,
And I found the armor of a hero legendary,
Which I proceeded to don with some glee,
When I was rather rudely interrupted,
By an invisible beast-man, foul and corrupted.
I had proceeded where no man had been before,
Or so I thought, how could I know?
As I fought my personal holy war,
In caves where rivers of lava flow,
That the archbishop Lazarus had to go,
Through here to meet his evil master,
I had to keep fighting faster and faster.
I was almost through those terrible caves,
But what came next? I had to wonder,
As I sent countless rhino-men to their graves,
With one fell stroke I would sunder,
Heads from necks, then collect my plunder,
I found a stairwell with little skill,
But fighting fear to go down there took all of my will.
What I saw almost stopped me in my tracks,
Or perhaps it was the terrible smell,
I parried a demon’s sword with my axe,
The monsters down here had steel armor as well,
So this was the place that we call Hell,
I dropped my axe and drew my blade,
Armored demons and witches a-plenty were slayed.
Cain the Elder told me of the Archbishop Lazarus,
How he turned to serve dark Diablo,
And how he had betrayed all of us,
I took up my great-sword with eyes a-glow,
What happened next I do not know,
I found myself standing in a rage,
Facing off against the unholy traitor mage.
He cast off a fireball, that I remember,
My armor warded off the heat of its blast,
Then I finally had my chance to dismember,
Limb from limb, the evil one at last,
One more foe’s corpse I could walk past,
I stood on the pentagram, almost finished my work,
Looking at the portal to where Diablo did lurk.
I counted scores of Hell Knights arrayed in rows,
Like a sinister, deadly welcoming party,
As a steel whirlwind, I parried their blows,
I waded through bodies, tired and bloody,
I saw the door where Diablo was, and opened it grimly,
The Lord of Terror was incredible sight,
Nine feet tall, with unholy might.
He was spiky all over, and glistened with poison,
Diablo laughed at me and called fire from his claws,
To hide my fear I yelled out, “Bring it on!”
He tried to bite off my head with his jaws,
And I saw his carapace was not without flaws,
I slammed his head with my heavy Warhammer,
He broke it in twain, his movement a blur.
We continued in this fashion for a short while,
But I was running out of weaponry,
I was terrified, I tasted bile,
And I was much relieved to see,
A hole where hard skin used to be,
I gave a great slash ‘cross his stomach,
In my last desperate Attack.
Out spilled his bowels in one loud splash,
He screamed and fell down to the floor,
For luck, I dealt his skull a bash,
To ensure my final victory in the war,
With a smile I closed the door,
And made the long climb back to town,
After that, I swear I’ll never go back down.
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