October 18, 2007
Recap by Sassy
Comments by Sassy in italics.
First iMPACT since the Bound for Glory pay per view..
Our opener is a video recap of Bound for Glory.
And then we go to – who else – JB backstage with
Kurt Angle and the Mrs. where Kurt is complaining about his loss of the
championship to Sting at Bound for Glory. He
is blaming Kevin Nash for the loss and JB tells Kurt that Sting was going to
kill Kurt without Nash’s help. Kurt
threatens Nash and then threatens Sting. Kurt is going to wrestle Sting for the
championship tonight and no one will be there to help Sting. The Mrs. tells Kurt
he can’t beat Sting without Nash’s help. Kurt then throws JB and the Mrs.
Welcome to the iMPACT Zone!
IMPACT is being broadcast from Universal Studio in
Orlando, FL on Spike TV.
Ring announcers: Mike Tenay and Don West
Backstage interviews: Jeremy Borash (JB) and Crystal
Tenay tells everyone that three new champions were crowed at
Bound for Glory:
Gail Kim, the first TNA Women’s Knockout Champion
AJ Styles and Tomko, new TNA Tag Team Champions
Sting, new TNA World Champion
The title belts will be presented to the winners tonight.
We hear – and I am not overly enthusiastic – Kurt
Angle’s entrance theme and here comes none other than Kurt…again. Isn’t
there anyone else in the locker room that has something to say besides Kurt?
Kurt has a mic in hand, naturally. Kurt and the Mrs. are there to call out Sting
in order to challenge Sting for a rematch for the title belt. The audience
informs Kurt “You SucK”. The crowd is chanting N W O and Kurt says he
doesn’t even know what that stands for, but to Kurt it means Number One
Zero??? Kurt again threatens Nash and Kevin Nash comes to the arena. Nash comes
down the ramp to the ring area. We see a video recap of the Sting/Angle match at
Bound for Glory. Kurt does what Kurt does best and that’s hide behind the Mrs.
Nash also has a mic and tells Kurt to say what he needs to say to Nash’s face.
Kurt tells Nash if it wasn’t for Nash, Kurt would still be the champion. Nash
reminds Kurt that Sting was kicking Kurt’s butt and Nash says the only reason
he came out was because Nash felt sorry for Kurt. Nash says he is giving Kurt
one chance to apologize to him. Kurt says he is not sorry and that Nash has been
riding Kurt’s coattails ever since Kurt became champion and continues to
insult Nash. Nash says Kurt doesn’t have a fight with Sting tonight, Kurt has
a fight with Nash. Kurt attacks Kurt but Nash sends Kurt down to the mat with a
jackknife. You go Kevin – at
least you shut Kurt up. No one else seems to be able to do that.
Back from commercial break, we see a promo for the Genesis
pay per view scheduled for November 11, 2007.
Back in the iMPACT Zone, we see a replay of Nash taking out
Kurt in the middle of the ring. We are in the back with JB, Kurt and the Mrs.
Kurt is complaining that his back hurts and the Mrs. wants to know what she is
going to do if Sting grants Kurt a rematch tonight. She says he needs to make up
with Nash and Kurt asks JB what Nash likes.
JB says Nash likes porn. Kurt tells the Mrs. to run down to the local
store and pick up a big stack of porn magazines. Kurt says that he will tell
Nash that it was just a big joke.
Fight for the Right Tournament:
1 – Eric Young
6 – James Storm
4 – Lance Hoyt
5 – Kaz
2 – Robert Roode
7 – Junior Fatu
3 – Alex Shelley
6 – Chris Sabin
Chris Sabin, from Detroit, MI, Motor City Machineguns
Alex Shelley, from Detroit, MI, Motor City Machineguns
Actual match time: 30 seconds
Winner – We don’t have a clue because someone
forgot to lock the door and Team 3D got into the building and stopped the match.
I have to tell you that I was excited about this match. As
great as these two work together I can’t imagine them opposing each other.
They are both marvelous in the ring and I wouldn’t want to have to take a
guess at who is going to win this match. They do shake hands before the match
and then it is on! They are so busy countering each other’s moves in the
opening seconds of this match, you wonder if two hours will be long enough for
either of them to get the pin.
As Don West would say, “You have GOT to be kidding
me!” -- Brother Ray of Team 3D enters the arena with mic in hand running
off his mouth and stopping the action in the ring. Where is Nash when we need
him or, better yet, The Steiner Brothers? Ray continues by telling Sabin and
Shelley how terrible they are and Brother Devon enters the ring and attacks them
from behind. Obviously The Steiner Brothers obviously didn’t beat hard
enough on Ray and Devon at Bound for Glory. Ray and Devon attack Sabin and
Shelley, the ref rings the bell trying to stop the match – that’ll do it
ref, no joke – and we know the reaction of Team 3D is the interference by
the Motor City Machineguns during Team 3D’s match with The Steiners that got
Rick and Scott the final fall they needed to win at Bound for Glory. While the
ref stands on the ring apron frantically waving his arms, Ray beats on Sabin and
Shelley with the famous belt we saw at Bound for Glory. Ray calls for Devon to
get the tables and Devon complies. Ray declares that Team 3D is going to single
handedly destroy the X Division. You know I think Ray would be loud enough
without the mic. The tables are up in the ring. Ray sends Shelley through a
table and Sabin is sent through a table by Devon. I do like Team 3D but fans
worldwide would like to know how Sabin and Shelley would have fared against each
other in this match.
JB is in Jim Cornette’s office with Cornette and Matt
Morgan. Cornette is yelling that he can’t have one tournament around here
without the burrito brothers coming out and screwing everything up for the very
first match. Cornette wants to know what he is going to do now in the Fight for
the Right tournament but is interrupted when Christian Cage enters his office
with – a ladder. Now that’s the Christian Cage we all know and love!
Christian says there is spot open in the Fight for the Right tournament and
Christian is going to fill it. Christian
says he should be the number one contender anyway. Christian says he is going to
do it his way and his way is a ladder match. Enter Samoa Joe and Cornette wants
to know what Joe wants. Please
note that Christian has put the ladder between himself and Joe. Joe says he
wants the last spot in the tournament but Christian tells him, from behind the
ladder of course, that Joe is too late. Christian threatens Joe, Joe reaches
through the latter, Matt gets in the middle to break it up and we see…
Back from commercial break, Tenay is backstage with Glen
Gilbertti, previously with WCW as the Disco Inferno. Glen wrestled earlier in TNA. Tenay says the movie, The
Comeback, coincides with the comeback of Glen and that his wrestling comeback
may be considered a parody, however, Glen says that it will not be a parody.
Glen says he doesn’t need TNA, TNA needs him.
Talia Madison, from The Big Apple
Awesome Kong, 6’1”, weighing 272 3/8 lbs., residing in
Actual match time: 2 minutes, 10 seconds
Winner: Awesome Kong with a pin and a three count.
It’s difficult to take Madison as a serious wrestler
when she is too concerned that everyone in the audience notice her backside as
she enters the ring. Kong, on the other hand, doesn’t even notice the audience
on her way to the ring. I’m certain this match is over before it starts.
And it’s one, two, three -- Madison is down for the count.
JB is in the back with Kevin Nash and in the middle of
Nash’s conversation with JB, who should show up but Kurt’s Mrs. wanting to
talk to Nash. Nash doesn’t want to talk to her. He walks away and we go to…
Back from commercial break, we see a promo of Instant
Classic: The Best of Christian Cage, which will be available Tuesday on DVD.
Crystal is backstage with Wildcat Chris Harris and The War
Machine Rhino who will be facing Robert Roode and Cowboy James Storm tonight.
Rhino comes in and Wildcat tells Rhino that if they are going to be tag team
partners they should be doing things at the same time and they should have
showed up for the interview together. Wildcat then tells Rhino to try and stay
sober tonight. Rhino grabs Wildcat’s arm and asks him if he has a problem and
Wildcat laughs and tells him the fight is out there. Doesn’t look good for
Wildcat and Rhino, does it?
Cowboy James Storm, from TN
accompanied to the ring by The Pride of Tennessee Miss Jackie
Robert Roode, from Wall Street in Manhattan, NY
accompanied to the ring by his CEO, Miss Brooks
Wildcat Chris Harris, from Fort Wright, KY
The War Machine Rhino, from Detroit, MI
Actual match time: 5 minutes, 43 seconds
Winners: Robert Roode and Cowboy James Storm when
Roode gets the payoff on Wildcat.
Everyone should know by now who my favorites in this match
are and the fact that Wildcat and Rhino are already fighting amongst themselves.
I have a feeling I’m not going to like this match. Tenay and West bring up
Rhino’s involvement in The Monster’s Ball at Bound for Glory and his crash
through the wall. All four of these guys can brawl in a match and as much as
I pick on Roode, he is a great ring talent. Rhino helps Wildcat to his feet
but Wildcat is not happy. Wildcat may not be making waves as a baby face, but
I don’t think he’s up to the task of becoming the bad guy either. Maybe a
little of each is what his character requires.
JB is backstage with Kaz. JB congratulates Kaz for qualifying
in the Fight for the Right tournament. Kaz believes he is going to be fighting
for the right for gold.
Back from commercial break, Tenay and Cornette are in the
ring with the championship belts. They are going to make the presentation of the
championship belts to the Bound for Glory winners.
We hear Black Machismo Jay Lethal’s music and he enters the arena. Lethal retained his championship at Bound for Glory and West says he doesn’t know why Lethal is in the ring. Cornette tells Lethal he is not a new champion but since they didn’t get a chance to congratulate Lethal on his win, they congratulate him now. Lethal gives the audience an “Oh Yeah!” Tenay says that the history maker at Bound for Glory will be the first recipient.
Gail Kim, who won the first TNA Knockout Championship, enters the arena. Gail receives her belt and the applause of the audience. I really like the Women’s belt – not crazy about the Knockout name thing, but I like the belt. Gail thanks the fans and accepts the belt.
We go next to the TNA Tag Team champions, The Phenomenal AJ Styles and Tomko. Christian Cage comes along with the new tag team champs. Cornette presents them with their championship belts. Tomko tells AJ that he did a great job and then gives the mic to AJ who has a list. He wants to thank several people and gets started before Christian grabs the mic and tells Tomko and AJ they should both be thanking Christian for their title belts. Cornette wants to know why Christian is out there when he isn’t even a champion. Christian says that they can’t have a night of champions without the real champ – Christian. Christian says he isn’t asking Cornette anymore, Christian is telling Cornette that Christian wants the final spot in the Fight for the Right tournament and Christian wants it tonight. Cornette says that Christian wants the spot and so does Samoa Joe. Cornette says the only fair thing to do is to give both Joe and Christian the Right to Fight for the Right to Fight for the Right so that is what Cornette is going to do. It will be Christian and Joe one on one. The winner of tonight’s match gets to fill the final spot in the Fight for the Right tournament. That match will be coming up next.
The last winner of a championship match is Sting and
he is next to receive his title belt. Sting enters the arena. Standing ovation
from the crowd as Sting enters the ring. Cornette says he has known Sting for
the 21 years he has been in the business and he presents Sting with the title
belt. Sting tells everyone he’s still got it. Tenay asks Sting if he is going
to accept the challenge from Kurt tonight to defend his title. Sting says he
will ask the fans and they say yes. Sting
says “It’s Showtime! One more time.”
And here comes Kurt to the ring. Again. But Kurt shows
up in a wheelchair at the top of the entrance ramp with a mic in hand and
assistants to help him roll the chair down the ramp. Kurt tells Sting that he
was brutally attacked by Kevin Nash earlier tonight and Kurt has a doctor’s
note that says he can’t compete tonight due to serious trauma of the spinal
cord. Kurt says he will take Sting up on his offer next week at iMPACT. Sting
asks if Kurt’s Mommy signed the note and tells Kurt to bring the wheelchair
next week because he will need it
when Sting gets through with him.
We see Glen Gilbertti in the locker room and West says that
tonight Glen will make his big comeback.
We go to commercial break.
Back from commercial break, we see a promo for TNA’s Hard
Justice DVD available now.
JB is back stage with Kurt and the Mrs. once again. Kurt is
whining because he is afraid that Sting is going to hurt him and now Kurt wants
to find Kevin and get him back on his side for next week.
Fight for the Right Tournament Line Up – Sabin and Shelley
are out, which I think is a big load of You Know What. They are just as much
championship material as anyone else on the TNA roster.
1 – Eric Young
6 – James Storm
4 – Lance Hoyt
5 - Kaz
2 – Robert Roode
7 – Junior Fatu
Lance Hoyt, from Dallas, TX
accompanied to the ring by Christy Hemme & Jimmy Rave
Kaz, from Anaheim, CA
Actual match time: 4 minutes, 3 seconds
Winner: Kaz after a cover and a three count thanks to
interference by Hemme.
The audience favorite appears to be Kaz and, although I
like Lance, I’m a fan of Kaz as well. The difference between the two wrestlers
is obvious. Kaz is a high flier while Lance uses brute strength to carry him
through a match. After having seen Jimmy Rave in action I am surprised TNA
isn’t using him with the abilities he has. Rave and Kaz could have had one
heck of a match. Rave and Hemme manage to fight on the ring apron and Kaz
takes the opportunity to deliver a punch sending Rave out to the guardrail but
Hemme gets herself into the ring much to the dismay of Lance. Kaz has turned
into quite the ladies man and he sets Hemme up for a big smooch, which sets
Lance off. Hemme falls to the mat and Lance loses courtesy of Hemme.
Crystal is backstage with Crazy Legs Connie who is the
champion of major league eating, which is coming up right after TNA. No
offense, I think I’ll pass.
Crystal says speaking of chowing down and enter Junior Fatu.
Fatu tells Crazy Legs to set up the buffet and Junior Fatu will shut it down.
Fatu says that next week when he faces Roode, he will come out the winner.
Back from commercial break, we are backstage – again
with JB, Kurt in his wheelchair and the Mrs. who are going to see Black Reign.
Kurt refuses to go, JB refuses to go so the Mrs. goes in to talk to Black
Reign about whether or not he has seen Kevin Nash. Black Reign produces Misty,
which sends the Mrs. and JB running, leaving Kurt alone in the wheelchair. It’s
a domestic rat, ya’ll, not a hungry lion.
The Disco Inferno, from Brooklyn, NY
The Monster Abyss, 6’8”, weighing 350, lbs.
Actual match time: 53 seconds
Winner: Abyss with a black hole slam, a pin and a
What a terrible way to begin a comeback to TNA. Of the
entire roster available, to pull Abyss on your first match you have to believe
someone has it out for Inferno. It was impossible to judge Inferno’s ring
ability when pairing him with someone so much larger and stronger.
After the match, guess who shows up to take Abyss but Black
Reign, James Mitchell and the poor little rat, Misty. And, in the general bad
taste of TNA in this instance, Abyss is handcuffed to the ropes, puts Misty in
bag and puts the bag over Abyss’s head. I’m sure Misty was thrilled to be
in a bag over the sweaty bleeding head of Abyss.
If I was Abyss, I’d be worried Misty would bite out of fear. Stupid
move, TNA. Really stupid move.
Black Reign licks Misty, which may be dangerous for Misty. Domestic rats are not immune to certain human illnesses.
I have trouble believing all of these people are really
that afraid of a little domestic rat.
Back from commercial break, we see a Bound for Glory video
recap telling everyone that the pay per view is available for the rest of the
We go back to the back, this time the parking lot, with JB,
Kurt and the Mrs. Nash is getting into his car and leaving.
Kurt falls getting out of his wheelchair as he tries to stop Nash from
leaving. The car drives off and Kurt screams that he will buy Kevin porn. This
has not been impressive.
The Instant Classic Christian Cage, from Tampa, FL, by way
of Ontario, Canada
The Samoan Submission Machine Samoa Joe, from American
Actual match time: 5 minutes, 30 seconds before the
7 minutes, 15 seconds after the commercial break
= 12 minutes, 45 seconds
According to Tenay, the action continued during the
commercial break but I did not count commercial time. Six minutes into
the second part of the match, AJ and Tomko hit the ring; Matt hit the ring to
take out Tomko and Roode showed up at the end to take out Joe with a chair.
Winner: Christian Cage with help from Tomko, AJ
Styles, Robert Roode, and a steel chair.
Commercial break in the MIDDLE of the match!
If you saw Bound for Glory, you know what a great match
these two managed. For them to go right back in the ring to pound on each other
right away is unreal and their stamina alone leaves me awestruck. I’m about to
knock TNA booking again. I thought the match held at Bound for Glory would put
the winner in line for the title. Not
that I mind watching Christian and Joe go after each other in the ring but by
now they should be great as a tag team. They should know what the other is
thinking right away from the number of matches they have had together. Joe has
been around too long and is far too good in the ring to be constantly treated as
a fall guy for Christian and Christian is too talented to want to be in the ring
against the same opponent all of the time. Give these two some actual matches,
TNA, and let them strut their stuff against other TNA roster members.
Samoa Joe didn’t have his Samoan dancers this time.
They did a great job at Bound for Glory and I don’t think I mentioned
that on the Bound for Glory recap.
We are now down to
1 – Eric Young
I’d like to see Eric get a chance at a championship
match, but I’ll bet it doesn’t happen.
6 – James Storm
is good and I think he might be able to pull this one off.
5 – Kaz
As much as I like Kaz in the ring, I’m betting he
doesn’t make it in.
2 – Robert Roode
is another one that might be able to pull it off.
7 – Junior Fatu
Not guessing on this one, Fatu is not only big, he’s
good in the ring.
Wildcard – Christian Cage
If I was a gambler, I would put money on Christian getting
the shot at the title belt.
If I did my math correctly, TNA iMPACT viewers saw a total
of 26 minutes of actual wrestling in tonight’s two-hour show with the longest
match being Christian Cage versus Samoa Joe.