July 14, 2008 Ė Recap by Sassy
Last week on Raw
Rey Mysterio defeated Santino Marella in 3 minutes.
In a womenís tag team match, Mickie James & Kelly
Kelly defeated Layla & Jillian in 4 minutes.
CM Punk, WWE World Heavyweight Champion defeated
Snitsky in 3 minutes. The rumor is
that Snitskyís nose was broken during the match.
Kofi Kingston, WWE Intercontinental Champion, defeated
Charlie Haas in 3 minutes.
In a Fatal Four-Way Number One Contenderís Match, The
Animal Batista defeated John Bradshaw Layfield, The Big Red Machine Kane &
John Cena in 7 minutes.
Monday Night Raw is broadcast on the USA network
Ringside announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry ďThe
Ring announcer: Lillian Garcia
Backstage interviews: Todd Grisham
The show opens with a replay of The Big Red Machine losing it
last week after his loss in the main event.
Kane attempted to beat up announcer Michael Cole and when Jerry ďThe
KingĒ Lawler came to Coleís defense, Kane took Lawler out instead. Shane and
Stephanie McMahon appear on the monitor to complain about the way the rosters
and crew have not been working together. Not to sound rude but I am fed up with
the Vincent Kennedy McMahon death angles that he continues to try to pull over
on the fans. The storylines on Raw
are bad enough without adding any more garbage to the weekly show.
As the camera goes back to the arena, Heartbreak Kid Shawn
Michaels and Y2J Chris Jericho are battling it out in their street clothes
outside the ring on the floor. Jerichoís gofer, Lance Cade, appears to rescue
Jericho and pull him out of harmís way. As numerous referees attempt to get
Michaels to the back, The Big Red Machine Kane appears and head down the ramp to
the ring with a bag of some sort in his hand. Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler
get to their feet with Lawler stepping in front of Cole Ė or maybe thatís
Cole moving to hide behind Lawler. Lillian
Garcia, the timekeeper and everyone else near the announcerís table scream and
run as the lights come back up and Kane leans across the announcerís table
staring down Lawler. Kane says something but I didnít catch what it was, and
then he heads back around the ring and up the ramp. Lawler and Cole say that
Kane said he was sorry for what he did last week. The camera shifts to the back
and Michaels and Jericho are battling it out backstage with everyone trying to
break them up.
Mickie James from Richmond, VA
WWE Womenís Champion
Katie Lea Burchill
With Paul Burchill
James goes for an early roll up but Burchill kicks out.
Burchillís brother is not a pleasant distraction at ringside. And he is a
distraction. James delivers a roll up and gets the three count and the win.
Time: 3 minutes.
Winner: Mickie James with a roll up
Mickie James in a great ring presence. I suspect that
Burchill may know something about wrestling but the fans havenít seen her
wrestle since she has been in WWE. The two Burchills go after James but Kofi
Kingston comes to the rescue and calls Burchill back into the ring. Brother
doesnít want to come back but his sister does. We go to commercial break.
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Kofi Kingston from Jamaica
WWE Intercontinental Champion
With Mickie James
Paul Burchill from England
With Katie Lea Burchill
Kingston goes for a small package but Burchill manages to
kick out. Cole reminds the audience that last week Burchill went after Kingston
last week after Kingston defeated Charlie Haas. Kingston is attempting to use
wrestling maneuvers against Burchill but heís going to have to stick to using
those high kicks in order to take out Burchill. James makes a decent cheerleader
for Kingston without being a major distraction outside the ring. Kingston
delivers a leg drop as Katie Lea hops up on the ring apron. James charges around
the ring to take care of Katie Lea as Kingston delivers trouble in paradise,
goes for the cover and gets the win. Time: 5 minutes.
Winner: Kofi Kingston with trouble
Kingston is a very talented flyer in the ring but his legwork
is even better. This was not a long match but Kingston did manage to use a few
decent wrestling holds during his time in the ring.
Santino Marella is backstage with Matt Striker. Marella says
that today he issued an open challenge today to anyone in the locker room.
Striker moves out of the way and Kane appears. Kane is looking for CM Punk.
Marella points Kane in the direction of Punkís locker room. We go to
Kane has found Punk. Kane tells Punk that deep down inside he
knows he is dead. Punk wants to know what Kane is talking about. Kane says that
tonight he needs Punk in the ring one on one. Punk says that he has the biggest
match of his life in six days and he canít believe that Kane is challenging
him. Kane says he needs it and Punk says that he needs to prove to everyone that
doesnít believe in him that they are wrong and Punk agrees to face Kane in the
ring tonight. Punk asks Kane what he has in the bag and Kane laughs and walks
off. John Cena is backstage with Todd Grisham. Grisham tells Cena that John
Bradshaw Layfield has issued a New York City Parking Lot Mat at Great American
Bash. Cena explains what a NYC Parking Lot match really is and I want to know if
Vince Russo is working for TNA AND WWE. Cena tells JBL that he doesnít like
JBL and he knows JBL doesnít like him. I hope this parking lot brawl is better
than the last one I watched. Shad and JTG of Cryme Tyme appear and Cena
challenges JBL to find himself two partners for a six-man tag team match. We go
to commercial break.
Santino Marella is in the ring and he wants to know who has
the guts (so to speak) to accept his challenge. The Glamazon Beth Phoenix
appears to accept the challenge.
Santino Marella from Italy
The Glamazon Beth Phoenix from Buffalo, NY
If Marella was embarrassed getting beaten by Rey Mysterio
last week, he could be really embarrassed this week. Iím actually enjoying
this match. Marella charges Phoenix in the corner but she gets out of the way,
takes Marella down in a roll up and gets the three count. Time: 1 minute.
The Glamazon Beth Phoenix with a roll up.
Phoenix is one strong wrestler. She picked Marella up more
than once during this match and made it look like she wasnít breaking a sweat
doing it. We go to commercial
Kelly Kelly from Jacksonville, FL is introduced for a match.
Before Kellyís opponent is introduced, the WWE World Tag Team Champions, Cody
Rhodes & Ted Dibiase, appear and head into the ring. Dibiase says that she
needs to leave because they have something to say. She leaves the ring. In the middle of their talk, Hacksaw Jim
Duggan appears and heads to the ring. Duggan says that he came out to talk to
Rhodes & Dibiase from the heart. Duggan says that they donít respect the
people that paved the way for them to be where they are. Rhodes gets in
Dugganís face Ė Duggan does have his trademark board in his hand. The
audience seems to disagree with the assessment of the tag team champions. JBL
appears on the monitor. He wants them to join him for the six-man tag team match
in the main event tonight. They accept. We go to commercial break.
The Big Red Machine Kane weighing 323 lbs.
CM Punk from Chicago, IL weighing 224 lbs.
WWE World Heavyweight Champion
I have the urge to yell RUN PUNK RUN! But running wonít
make the doubters any more positive about Punk holding that title. Punk is
working hard using his legs and manages to send Kane out to the floor. Kane goes
past the announcerís table and heads for the chair that Garcia vacated but he
doesnít pick it up. Kane does turn things around and he goes for a cover in
the ring but Punk gets a shoulder up at the count of two. Kane delivers a short
dropkick and again goes for a cover and again he gets a two count. The live
audience is pro Punk and they are chanting. Punk tries to go for a roll up but
Kane gets Punk by the throat. Punk delivers a high knee and then does it again.
Punk tries for the bulldog, but Kane fights it off. Punk takes Kane down to the
mat, delivers a kick to the back of Kaneís head and goes for the cover but
Kane kicks out after the count of one. Punk comes off the ropes with a cross
body block and again tries for a pin and he gets a two count. Punk tries to go
for the GTS but Kane breaks free. Punk ends up on the ring apron and Kane sends
him down to the floor. Punk sends Kane into the ring post and then climbs up on
the ring apron to come off and deliver a bulldog on the floor. He needs to be in
the ring, Punk! The ref has been counting and Punk rolls back in at the count of
9, winning the match. Time: 7 minutes.
Winner: CM Punk via count out
I hate to admit it when Punkís opponent was so much larger
but this was a great match. I was
just sure Kane was going to be able to take Punk out. And I am not a doubter but Kane is so much bigger and Kane is
quick for a big guy. After the match, chairs start flying into the ring courtesy
of Kane and the ref bails out of the ring. Punk makes the mistake of staying in
the ring and Kane enters the ring to take Punk down to the canvas. Kane has Punk
down, pounding on him. Kane gets to his feet and picks Punk up by the hair. Kane
drops Punk again and picks up the chair. He sets the chair up on Punkís neck
and climbs to the top turnbuckle. The Animal Batista appears to make the save
and he delivers a spear to Kane, and then nails Kane in the head with a chair
when he stands up. Batista picks Punk up off of the mat and stands him up. Punk
holds out his hand to Batista but Batista tells Punk he isnít his friend and
that Batista wants that title belt. Batista
pats Punk on the face and Punk shoves Batista backward. Batista delivers a spine
buster and leaves Punk in the ring. I predict Punk is going to beat Batista at
GAB and DONíT make a liar out of me Punk! We go to commercial break.
Y2J Chris Jericho weighing 222 lbs.
With Lance Cade
Paul London from Austin, TX weighing 190 lbs.
I was looking forward to see London in the ring again but
this isnít the way I wanted to see him in the ring. Jericho is out for blood
and London is paying for it. Cade is stalking around outside the ring with a
steel chair in his hand but London is back taking Jericho down with a kick.
London comes over the top rope and Jericho gets out of the way. Jericho delivers
a back breaker and tries to set up the walls of Jericho. London taps out. Time:
Winner: Chris Jericho via submission
I wasnít thrilled with this match even though Jericho does
make a great heel. As Jericho is telling London how he should handle his
wrestling career, Michaels appears at the tope of the entrance ramp. Cade is
standing outside the ring with the chair while Jericho is calling for Michaels
to come to the ring. We go to commercial break.
Jamie Noble is backstage with Layla. Noble tells her that
they can be Rawís power couple. Layla says that she doesnít date short men.
Noble says that he is way above average in a lot of ways, one in the wrestling
ring. He says he will challenge the next man that shows up. The next man that
shows up is Snitsky. Layla starts to panic when Noble gets in Snitskyís face.
Noble takes Laylaís hand and heads to the ring. Snitsky follows.
It may have been the ďbeat with an ugly stickĒ remark that Noble
Noble is going to get himself killed trying to get a date.
Noble goes after Snitsky before he gets all the way in the ring and Lawler notes
that there is no ref in the ring. That isnít stopping Snitsky from working
over Noble. Noble comes off the ropes and meets Snitskyís boot. Snitsky
delivers the pump handle slam and then stares at Layla. Snitsky climbs out of
the ring and Layla climbs up on the apron ring to check on Noble. Time: 2
Winner: Snitsky, if that was
actually a match, with a pump handle slam.
We go to commercial break.
The fans voted on who is in the most danger of losing their
title at GAB?
The Game Triple H
The Worldís Strongest Man Mark
Six-man Tag Team Match
John Bradshaw Layfield
WWE World Heavyweight Champions
We go to commercial break before their opponents are
At a combined weight of 525 lbs.
John Cena weighing 240 lbs.
I canít call this as a wrestling match; I can only call it
as who is getting the worst of the beat down. So far, JBLís side has been
getting the better of Cenaís side. Dibiase & Rhodes arenít doing a bad
job as a tag team but I think Cryme Tyme works better as a team. JBL should have
stayed home and the audience is hot for Cena but Cena hasnít spent any time in
the ring. We go to commercial break in the middle of the match. Back to the
action, JBL goes after Cena on the ring apron but Cena wasnít tagged into the
match and the ref makes Cena get back on the ring apron. Shad needs to make a
tag but heís not having much luck getting to his corner. Rhodes goes for a
bulldog but Shad sends Rhodes across the ring. Rhodes makes it back to his feet
and sends Cena off the ring apron to the floor. Dibiase gets tagged in and he
goes for the cover but Shad kicks out. Shad and Dibiase get into a boxing match
but Dibiase canít keep up with Shad. Dibiase tags in Rhodes. Rhodes misses a
leap off of the top turnbuckle and the fans are screaming for Shad to make a
tag. Shad makes it to Cena and now Cena is in the ring. Cena delivers the
five-knuckle shuffle and delivers the FU to Dibiase, drops Rhodes to the mat and
goes out to the top turnbuckle. Cena sends Rhodes down to the mat and locks
Rhodes in a submission hold. JBL enters the ring and kicks Cena in the head. The
ref calls for the bell. Time: 13 minutes.
Winners: John Cena, Shad & JTG
of Cryme Tyme via disqualification
JBL mouths off at Cena as he backs out of the arena and Cena
is on his feet chasing JBL through the building. We may have a preview of the
parking lot brawl before the Raw goes off the air. Cena is outside the building
looking for JBL but JBL is nowhere to be found. Cena heads back toward the
building and then stops and goes back toward the parking lot. JBL catches Cena
from behind with a tire iron? JBL sets Cena up against a car and heads back to
get in another car. I'm sure I've
seen this gimmick before -- on WWE no less.
JBL runs into the other car and then gets out of his car Ė which is a
big ugly gas-guzzler, by the way. JBL is looking a little confused and we go off