Monday Night Raw

Monday Night Raw

February 4, 2008 Ė Recap by Sassy

If you saw Friday Night Smackdown you saw the match between Rey Mysterio and CM Punk against Chavo Guerrero and Edge. It was a decent match between these four wrestlers.  Iíd like to see the same kind of action on Monday Night Raw this week.

Monday Night Raw is broadcast from the University of Texas, Austin, TX 

on the USA network.

Ringside announcers: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

Ring announcer: Lillian Garcia

Backstage interviews: Todd Grisham

Lawler informs the audience that tonight John Cena will face The Worldís Strongest Man Mark Henry in an Arm Wrestling Contest. JR informs the audience that Vince McMahon will force his son, Hornswoggle, to join McMahonís Kiss My Ass Club.

Randy Orton, WWE Champion, is in the center of the ring. I believe we may have a contract-signing coming up.  The audience gives Orton the usual hisses and boos welcome, along with a few ďyou suckĒ chants. Orton has the mic, unfortunately, and he says that he has an official WWE contract in his hands. He says that last week John Cena accepted Ortonís challenge to face him at No Way Out instead of at Wrestlemania. Orton says that Cenaís word means nothing to him and that is why Orton wants it in writing so that Cena canít back out in two weeks and there is no way Cena can claim he isnít fully recovered. Orton says that his lawyers (the flakes in suits also in the ring) drew up the contract. Orton says that Cena needs to come to the ring, have a seat and sign this contract.

John Cena makes his way to the arena and then down the entrance ramp and to the ring. The audience is much more enthusiastic when Cena enters. Did I mention last week how good Cena is looking these days?  Sorry female Cena fans.  He DID get married when he was out of WWE on medical leave.

Now we have Orton and Cena at the table in the center of the ring. We have an audience on their feet as Cena sends a slap Ortonís way. The audience proceeds to chant ďCenaĒ.  Iím in total agreement with the Monday Night Raw audience tonight. Cena signs the contract and slides it into Ortonís lap. Orton says he will see Cena in two weeks but tonight Cena has an arm wrestling match with Henry tonight and even if he gets injured during that match, Cena will still face Orton tonight.

Mark Henry charges down the ramp and Orton, the coward that he is, delivers an RKO to a distracted John Cena while the referees prevent Henry from entering the ring. May I just say Orton is the biggest coward I have ever seen in WWE?  Does he ever wrestle Ė or does he just run?

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, promo for The Legend of Stone Cold Steve Austin available this month.

Mark Henry is backstage with Orton. And just when I was starting to like Mark Henry! Todd asks them why they set Cena up and Orton says that they did not set Cena up. Orton says that William Regal set up the match between Henry and Cena. Orton says that as far as Henry coming out to ringside, Orton didnít need Henryís help.  Whatever, Orton. Henry takes the mic and says that he is going to enjoy ripping Cenaís arm right out of the socket.

Tag Team Match

Kelly Kelly from Jacksonville, FL

&

Mickie James from Richmond, VA

Vs.

Victoria from Los Angeles, CA

&

The Glamazon Beth Phoenix

Audience favorites: Kelly Kelly and Mickie James

My favorites: Mickie James, Victoria and Beth Phoenix

I think Mickie James and Kelly Kelly are in serious trouble here.  Thatís the best partner they could get for Mickie? Does Kelly understand she is the only woman in the ring dressed for the local strip club?  I am hoping that soon Mickie will be able to take out Beth, but it doesnít look like she is going to be able to do it tonight. Victoria delivers a DDT to Victoria and gets the cover and the three count. Beth is not happy about the loss but she doesnít go into the ring to help Victoria either.

Winners: Mickie James & Kelly Kelly

General Manager William Regal is backstage with Hornswoggle. He is telling Hornswoggle that he needs to do what his father tells him and the he should be proud to be a member of ďthis clubĒ. Regal is a member.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break.

HBK Shawn Michaels enters the ring. JR says that there will be no DX reunion tonight because Triple H will not be in the arena due to a family emergency. HBK takes the mic Ė CAN WE GET SOME WRESTLING HERE??? Ė and HBK tells the audience that last year at the Royal Rumble he almost eliminated The Undertaker but he made it to the main event at Wrestlemania anyway. He didnít beat John Cena for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania. HBK says that he hates second place and he doesnít want to be second place. HBK is putting everyone in the Elimination Chamber on notice. HBK says that at No Way Out and then Y2J Chris Jericho who will also be in the Elimination Chamber Match at No Way Out interrupts him. Jericho is going to tell the audience that he does respect HBK. Jericho says that Jericho will win the Elimination Chamber Match at No Way Out because Jericho has been in three Elimination Chamber Matches and he knows what it takes to make it to Wrestlemania. No offense, guys, but WHAT ABOUT WRESTLING NOW??? And Jeff Hardy makes his way to the arena.  He will also be in the Elimination Chamber Match at No Way Out. Iím sure Jeff is here to tell us that he will win the Elimination Chamber Match and go to Wrestlemania. Jeff says it is great that HBK and Jericho want to get back to Wrestlemania, but Jeff has never been in a main event at Wrestlemania and Jeff will sacrifice his body to get to levels where he has never been before. Yep, Jeff says he is going to win the match and then John Bradshaw Layfield who manages to make it to the ring minus his limo interrupts him.  He walked!  HBK, Jericho and Jeff got kudos from the audience.  JBL, who is from Texas by the way, is greeted with loud boos. JBL stands on the ring apron.  He does not enter the ring but he does tell everyone that he will be the one who win the Elimination Chamber Match and that Umaga, even though he doesnít speak English, he does speak money and he will ensure that JBL comes out the winner at No Way Out. Umaga decides it is time to come to the ring. We can only hope he is there to shut JBL the hell up! JBL applauds Umagaís arrival and Umaga does enter the ring with the other three wrestlers. JBL sneaks in behind Umaga and hides behind him. Umaga turns to JBL and JBL looks a little confused. Snitsky enters the arena and heads toward the ring.  He does not look happy as he glares at the other wrestlers in the ring. Snitsky says they have all had their chances and Snitsky deserves to be in the Elimination Match. If he doesnít get one of their spots, he will just have to take it.  HBK says Snitsky doesnít deserve anything. HB goes after Snitsky and we have a brawl in the middle of the ring. Jericho goes after JBL and Jeff goes after Umaga.

William Regal enters the arena and says it will be Snitsky, JBL and Umaga against Jericho, Hardy and HBK. Itís about time SOMEONE decides we should have an actual match.

Promo for No Way Out, John Cena versus Randy Orton for the WWE Championship. No Way Out is in two weeks, live, on pay per view. See your local cable company for further details or go to www.wwe.com.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break.

Mr. Kennedy from Green Bay, WI, weighing 243 lbs.

Vs.

Super Crazy weighing 200 lbs.

Super Crazy was already in the ring when we got back from commercial break, but Lillian introduced him after Kennedy entered the ring.

Audience favorite:  Iím not sure

My favorite: I like them both

Super Crazy hasnít been in the ring much on Raw and Iím not sure why. He is a very good wrestler and is a risk taker. Kennedy is working on Super Crazyís left leg. Iím disappointed we arenít having a real match here. Kennedy applies an inverted figure four and Super Crazy is forced to tap out.

Winner

Mr. Kennedy

That match was terrible. I was not impressed and the fact that Kennedy is getting his mic from the ceiling after the match does not make it any better. Super Crazy had the fan approval in this match and the fans arenít interested in what Kennedy has to say. We see a recap of the match between M.V.P. and Ric Flair on last Friday Nightís Smackdown when MVP lost due to DQ. Kennedy is making fun of Flair and that certainly isnít winning him over with the Monday Night Raw fans. Kennedy tells Flair that Kennedy will give him an opportunity to come out next week on Raw and forfeit their match at No Way Out. Kennedy says that if Flair decides to continue with their match at No Way Out, not only will Kennedy end Flairís career, Flair will limp for the rest of his life.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, Mike Adamle is out in the audience to talk about No Way Out and the Elimination Chamber Match which features Y2J Chris Jericho, John Bradshaw Layfield, HBK Shaw Michaels, Jeff Hardy, The Game Triple H, and Umaga. The winner of this match will face the WWE Champion in a title match at Wrestlemania. We see a rundown of the elimination chamber. 

Tag Team Match

Santino Marella

&

Carlito

At a combined weight of 447 lbs.

Accompanied to the ring by Maria

Vs.

Brian Kendrick

&

Paul London

At a combined weight of 382 lbs.

Audience favorites: Iím not sure

My favorites: I like them all

Paul London has been out with an injured foot but he appears to be off the disabled list and back in action. JR mentions that London lives in Austin, TX. Marella does a great job of running from London outside the ring but Carlito manages to get the cover and the three count inside the ring.

Winners

Carlito

&

Santino Marella

I have to say it.  This match wasnít worth watching.

McMahon is backstage and he busy getting his backside polished. Sorry, thatís what it looks like. This is as bad as the last match.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, promo for ECW, Tuesday night on Sci-Fi.

McMahon enters the ring. Give me a break, wrestling fans. I only watch this stuff to write about it.  I have am definitely an anti-WWE fan these days. McMahon has the mic and he says that he has set an example of how employees should be treated. Hornswoggle should be talking to Ortonís attorneys over this. McMahon tells the audience that as parents they are pathetic and they donít care about their children. If I had a small child right now, McMahon, they wouldnít be watching this stuff.  I can guaran-damn-tee you that! McMahon says that every parent should make their kids kiss their ass. It says thatís tough love.  I call it sick. McMahon introduces his bastard son, Hornswoggle.

Hornswoggle enters the ring to the cheers of the fans. Hornswoggle should be kicking McMahonís ass, not kissing it.  And I am a parent. McMahon gets down on one knee to talk to Hornswoggle and that it will hurt McMahon more than it hurts Hornswoggle. The audience disagrees with McMahon. Hornswoggle is having a problem doing what he is told and the audience is telling him not to do it. And itís Finlay to the rescue.

Finlay comes down the ramp and to the ring making McMahon pull up his pants in a hurry. Finlay is not happy with McMahon and McMahon gives Finlay a hard time about loyalty and friendship. McMahon tells Finlay that after Hornswoggle, Finlay can kiss his ass. Finlay holds Hornswoggle back and McMahon says if Finlay knows what it good for him, he will let Hornswoggle go. Finlay doesnít listen and he backs Hornswoggle up as McMahon bends over. McMahon threatens Finlay and then Hornswoggle. Instead Hornswoggle takes a bite out of McMahonís bared backside and Finlay takes Hornswoggle and leaves the arena laughing.

McMahon is mad that the crowd is laughing at him and he says that since they like that next week McMahon will be in action against his bastard son, Hornswoggle. McMahon says that it is the fault of the audience. If Finlay gets involved in that match, Finlay will be fired.

Replay of what just happened between Hornswoggle and McMahon with a little help from Finlay.

JR reminds the audience about the six-man tag team match coming up tonight.

Tag Team Match

Hardcore Holly

&

Cody Rhodes

At a combined weight of 452 lbs.

WWE World Tag Team Champions

Vs.

Lance Cade

&

Trevor Murdoch

At a combined weight of 532 lbs.

Audience favorites: Iím not sure

My favorites: I like them all

Winners

Cody Rhodes

&

Hardcore Holly

After the match, Carlito, Marella and Maria enter the arena. Carlito says that he and Marella are the next contenders for the tag team titles.

Lawler reminds the audience that Cena will face Henry in an arm wrestling match.

Promo for No Way Out, Elimination Chamber Match.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, promo for Project Runway with the Divas from WWE.

Plug for No Way Out by JR and Lawler.

Six Man Tag Team Match

Jeff Hardy from Cameron, NC, weighing 225 lbs.

WWE Intercontinental Champion

&

HBK Shawn Michaels from San Antonio, TX

&

Y2J Chris Jericho weighing 226 lbs.

Commercial break before the opponents are introduced.

Back from commercial break, promo for ECW on Tuesday night (which is tomorrow if you havenít checked your calendar).

Vs.

Snitsky

&

John Bradshaw Layfield

&

Umaga from the Isle of Samoa, weighing 350 lbs.

Snitsky and JBL were already at ringside when we got back from commercial break.

Audience favorites: Jeff Hardy, Shawn Michaels & Chris Jericho

My favorites: Jeff Hardy, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho and Umaga

COMMERCIAL BREAK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MATCH!

AGAIN!

Winners

Jeff Hardy

HBK Shawn Michaels

&

Y2J Chris Jericho

I apologize but I missed the arm wrestling contest between John Cena and The Worldís Strongest Man Mark Henry.

 

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