Monday Night Raw

Monday Night Raw

December 3, 2007

Recap by Sassy

Comments by Sassy noted in italics.


RAW IS JERICHO!  We might like Jericho but Ric Flair is a real fan. Last week Jericho assisted Flair in beating Randy Orton and saving Flair’s career – for now. But we know that Jericho is out to get Orton’s championship belt.  One of the matches at Armageddon is Y2J Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton, WWE Championship Match!

Me want title match!

This writer apologizes for missing ECW and being unable to file a recap last week. We did, however manage to take in two Ring of Honor events and the latest TNA pay per view, Turning Point. We solemnly swear not to miss ECW again!

Raw is being broadcast on the USA network.

Ringside announcers: JR and Jerry Lawler

Ring announcer: Lillian Garcia

Backstage announcer: Todd Grisham

And we open the show with Y2J Chris Jericho entering the arena. RAW IS JERICHO! This much I can tell you about Jericho. I can type what he says but it will never be with the same force of delivery. Jericho tells us that last week after Raw went off the air, Orton gave Jericho a title match.  And we will see the replay: Orton not only gives Jericho the title match, he threatens Jericho with a major beat down. I don’t know about the rest of the Jerichaholics, but this one doesn’t think Orton can take out Jericho.

We hear Orton’s music and he enters the arena. Disrupting Jericho!

Orton not only enters the arena; he enters the ring to whine to Jericho about Jericho getting a title match just after he returns to WWE. I didn’t realize how much shorter Jericho was than Orton. Fortunately for Jericho, he can fight dirtier than Orton ever dreamed of. Jericho should take him out now and get it over with. Jericho throws down the mic and here comes William Regal, General Manager of Raw, to break up the fun.  The live audience doesn’t like it Regal's interruption any better than I do! Regal tells Jericho and Orton they can’t face each other tonight, but they can pick each other’s opponents. Orton picks Jericho’s opponent: The Samoan Bulldozer Umaga. Jericho picks Orton’s opponent: HBK! 

JR tells us we have an Intercontinental Match tonight: WWE Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy vs. Snitsky.

We see Marie and Mickie James in the back coming toward the arena.  We have a diva’s match after

Commercial break

Back from commercial break.

Diva Tag Team Match

Maria from Chicago, IL


Mickie James from Richmond, VA


Melina from Los Angeles, CA


The Glamazon Beth Phoenix from Buffalo, NY

Audience favorites: Maria & Mickie James

My favorites: The Glamazon Beth Phoenix and Mickie James

Winners: The Glamazon Beth Phoenix and Melina

This match should be all about Beth and Mickie since Mickie has a match with Beth at Armageddon for the WWE Women’s Championship. The match starts with Melina and Maria facing each other in the center of the ring. Melina tags in Beth and Beth wants Mickie in the ring. Maria obliges and it’s all elbows and chops by Mickie, but Beth over powers her. Mickie is fast, but she doesn’t’ have the size advantage.  Beth does. Beth has some fantastic moves as she pins Mickie for the win.

Todd is backstage with HBK Shawn Michaels. HBK is looking forward to his match with Orton because, even though the title is not on the line, sweet chin music is allowed. We see Kennedy on the monitor and he is yelling for HBK’s attention. Kennedy is facing HBK at Armageddon. I hope it’s just the telecast system but Kennedy looks like he’s high.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, we see an Armageddon promo.

Mr. Kennedy enters the arena and he says he has invited three of HBK’s closest friends in order to find out more about HBK. First person out is HBK’s first partner, from The Rockers, Marty Jennetty. Not exactly. Second out is someone HBK faced at Wrestlemania X in the greatest ladder match of all time: Razor Ramon – not exactly again. Hall couldn’t even make it to the TNA pay per view last night. Kennedy tells the Razor Ramon wannabe that he’s glad it could make it. Last out is the person HBK faced at Wrestlemania XI for the WWE title – Big Daddy Cool Diesel. One more time, not exactly. Just when we thought the story lines couldn’t get any worse…Kennedy says it is missing something without the man himself – HBK Shawn Michaels – with a sparkler? My take is that you would have to be hard up to get on TV with WWE in order to do this kind of crap. HBK enters the ring and cleans house. The only man left standing – the coward Kennedy has already bailed out of the ring—is the HBK dress alike.  He falls to the mat all by himself and rolls out of the ring. FYI: The men poorly portraying the blast from the past wrestlers are actually Independent wrestlers.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, Vince McMahon and Jonathan Coachman are backstage. McMahon says that on the three hour special Hulk Hogan will be there. Coach says that Trish Stratus will be there. McMahon says that The Hardcore Legend Mick Foley will be there. Coach says that Eric Bischoff will be there and Stone Cold Steve Austin will be there. Note: No mention is made of The Rock who shown up in the advertisements for the three hour special. Hornswoggle interrupts the chat and McMahon asks Coach to bring him a chair. McMahon wants to talk to Hornswoggle about the three hour match and they will have the first ever McMahon in the ring portrait and it will be McMahon, Stephanie, Shane, McMahon’s wife (her name is Linda in case ya’ll forgot) and, of course, Hornswoggle. McMahon says that Finlay is not in the building tonight so it will be a no disqualification handicap match: Hornswoggle against Carlito and Coach. It appears McMahon has left his cell phone behind and now Hornswoggle has it. And he is making calls…

JR gives us a replay of Jeff Hardy and Triple H versus Umaga and Snitsky but Triple H and Jeff Hardy will face each other at Armageddon. And that’s the bottom line because William Regal says so.

Triple H and William Regal are backstage and Triple H wants to know about the match Regal made between Triple H and Jeff Hardy. Regal says it made sense to him to make the match and the winner will get a WWE title match at The Royal Rumble. You know how Triple H is going to handle that news. Poor Jeff.

We see Umaga heading toward the arena for his match with Chris Jericho.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, we see the match last week between Chris Jericho and Santino Marella.

Umaga, weighing 350 lbs., from the Isle of Samoa


Y2J Chris Jericho, weighing 220 lbs.

Audience favorite: Chris Jericho

My favorite: I like them both

Winner: We don’t know because Boring, I mean, Randy Orton interrupts the match. We might assume that the match was either a no contest due to interference or Chris Jericho was awarded the match due to interference by Orton.

Slight weight difference here.

Commercial break before the match begins.

Back from commercial break,



Jericho and Umaga are out on the floor. Bright move WWE. Jericho is in a match and we miss several minutes of it because of commercial break.  Jericho appears to be holding his own as he pounds on Umaga. Umaga rolls back into the ring and we hear JR tells us “there was all kinds of action during the commercial break”. Thanks, JR, that makes WWE home viewers feel so much better. We see by the split screen that Jericho springboards off the second rope and dropkicks Umaga off the ring apron and to the floor. Jericho then sails over the top rope to nail Umaga with a cross body block that sends both men down to the floor. Back to real time, Jericho appears to have Umaga in a submission hold but Umaga tosses Jericho over his head. As Jericho gets back to his feet, Umaga picks him up and throws him over the top rope to the floor outside. And Jericho is down and the ref is counting. Jericho is back to his feet and Umaga helps him into the ring to drop him back to the mat with a clothesline. Umaga comes off the ropes and lands on Jericho, going for the cover. He gets a two count before Jericho gets a shoulder off the mat. Umaga applies a vice grip hold to Jericho’s right shoulder. The crowd is begging Jericho to get back to his feet. And he does, and then trips Umaga sending him face first into the bottom turnbuckle. Umaga delivers a kick to Jericho, sending him back to the mat, but Jericho is back up and still fighting back. Umaga has Jericho in the corner and is beating on Jericho but the ref gets in the middle and breaks it up. Umaga backs up and charges across the ring to slam into Jericho but Jericho rolls out of the ring and Umaga hits the corner post. As Umaga staggers back into the ring, Jericho comes off the top turnbuckle and nails Umaga in the back sending him down to the canvas. Both men are down in the ring and the ref is counting. He gets to the count of seven and both men are to their feet. We now have Jericho punching on Umaga before delivering a kick and coming off the ropes to deliver a splash. Jericho goes for the pin but only gets a two count. Umaga charges Jericho in the corner, Jericho sidesteps and Umaga goes chest first into the corner post. Jericho delivers a code breaker and guess who enters the ring to kick Jericho and deliver the (yawn) RKO.

We see Hornswoggle heading to the ring.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break.

Two on One Handicap Match, No Disqualification

Carlito, weighing 220 lbs., from The Caribbean


Jonathan Coachman, weighing 235 lb., from Wichita, KS



Audience favorite: Hornswoggle

My favorite: Hornswoggle and Carlito

Winner: Hornswoggle

with a whole lot of help from the APA.

Hornswoggle is smiling.  That should scare Carlito and Coach! Hornswoggle holds up one finger and he walks around the ring to Lillian Garcia and whispers in her ear. Hornswoggle has her announce that for this match, he has hired protection. Here comes the APA! JBL AND RON SIMMONS! I believe Coach is in serious trouble. JBL hits the clothesline from hell, Hornswoggle hits the tadpole splash and gets the three count.

The audience is chanting APA! Simmons appears to have stayed active at least in the gym. JBL doesn't appear to have that same muscular look.

NOTE:  We have heard that Carlito has requested and received his release from WWE. I can’t say that I blame Carlito for wanting to take a walk. I can’t remember the last time I saw Carlito in an actual wrestling match and while I can’t argue that Carlito has some great comedic talent, he has wrestling talent that is being wasted.

Todd Grisham is backstage with Snitsky and he asks Snitsky about his match with Jeff Hardy. Snitsky says that he is facing Jeff in the ring because Jeff has something he wants – the Intercontinental Championship.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, we see the WWE Rewind – the match between Jeff Hardy and Triple H against Umaga and Snitsky from last week. Jeff Hardy and Triple H were victorious in this match.

WWE Intercontinental Title Match

Jeff Hardy, weighing 221 lbs., from Cameron, NC



Snitsky, weighing 307 lbs., from PA


Audience favorite: Jeff Hardy

My favorite: Jeff Hardy

Winner: Jeff Hardy

who retains the WWE Intercontinental Championship.

Another slight weight difference in this match up. Jeff is extremely quick and agile and is prone to high risk. Snitsky does everything in the ring with brute force. If he can keep Jeff on the mat and off the ropes, he may have a chance of becoming the next Intercontinental champ. The bell rings and the two men lock up with Snitsky throwing Jeff into the ropes. Jeff goes up form the top ropes, but Snitsky catches him and sends him into the corner post. Snitsky drops an elbow on the downed Jeff, then picks him up and sends him head first into the top turnbuckle. Snitsky stomps on Jeff until the ref makes him back away but then he comes back to deliver a boot to Jeff’s face. Again the ref warns Snitsky. Snitsky grabs Jeff by the ankles and slams him on the mat in the center of the ring, working on Jeff’s lower back. Snitsky gets Jeff in a double under hook Jeff kicks his way, but comes back at Snitsky and gets caught with a sidewalk slam. Snitsky goes for the cover and gets a two count. Snitsky pounds on Jeff with his fists. Jeff pulls himself up in the corner but Snitsky delivers a vertical suplex and Jeff is down again. Snitsky comes off the ropes with to deliver a leg drop but Jeff rolls out of the way and Snitsky meets the canvas. Jeff goes to work on Snitsky, delivering dropkicks before going for the cover. Jeff gets a one count. Jeff comes off the top to hit Snitsky with whisper in the wind and again goes for a cover but Snitsky powers out. Both men back to their feet. Snitsky charges at Jeff in the corner and gets his leg hung up. Jeff comes off the top rope with a Swanton bomb, goes for the cover and gets the three count. Snitsky is a little upset and shows it by delivering a boot to Jeff’s face. Snitsky goes out of the ring and reenters with a steel chair. We hear Triple H’s music and Triple H comes down the ramp carrying his weapon of choice – the sledgehammer. Snitsky wisely exits the ring before Triple H can get to him. Triple H is now alone in the ring with Jeff Hardy who is still down in the ring but trying to get to his feet. Triple H holds out his hand to Jeff and helps him to his feet, then pulls him face to face and the trash talking begins. In a fair fight, I’m not so sure I’d put my money on Triple H to face Jeff Hardy. Jeff has too many high-risk abilities Triple H does not use.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, we see the Smackdown Rebound – which is the feud going on between Edge and The Undertaker and Batista for Batista’s world title belt. Teddy Long is back, however, and there will be a triple threat match at Armageddon: The Undertaker versus Edge versus Batista for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Also at Armageddon: Mr. Kennedy vs. HBK Shawn Michaels, Triple H vs. Jeff Hardy (the winner of this match gets a shot at the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble), Finlay, accompanied by Hornswoggle vs. The Great Khali, Y2J Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Championship.

Jillian Hall is backstage with McMahon singing him Christmas carols.  Maybe I should say Jillian Hall is slaying Christmas carols. I had two canines walk up to the television and then beg me to shut it off – I am not kidding! Regal enters and tells McMahon that Stephanie is on her way to the arena. McMahon says the minute she gets there to make sure Regal brings her directly to McMahon’s office.

JR tells us the match coming up will be HBK against Mr. Kennedy.

Commercial break.

Back from commercial break, we see that next Monday McMahon will announce the greatest superstar in Raw history. **See this site’s Friday News Bytes for a list of possible candidates** Next Monday is the three-hour Raw special. Note: If you have a preset recording for Raw, please check to see how this show will be listed. It is our understanding it will be listed as a special and therefore may not tape unless you change the appropriate settings (this may only be valid for Tivo users, but just in case…)

Non-Title Match

HBK Shawn Michaels from San Antonio, TX


Randy Orton from St. Louis, MO

WWE Champion      

Audience favorite: HBK

My favorite: HBK

Winner: It looks like it might be Orton since HBK left the ring to brawl with Kennedy.

We know how much HBK is looking forward to taking out Orton but HBK seems to be having a problem with that as of late. We will have to wait and see if Chris Jericho is able to come out and interrupt this match just as Orton interrupted Jericho’s match with Umaga. The bell rings and Orton takes a swing at HBK but misses. HBK doesn’t miss and he sends Orton running from the ring. HBK follows Orton but gets caught on his way back into the ring. Orton sends HBK off the ropes and HBK comes off the deliver a swinging neck breaker. HBK takes Orton down to the mat with a side headlock. Orton gets HBK flipped over and HBK’s shoulders are on the mat, but he gets back over before a two count. Both men back to the feet but Orton can’t get the hold broken. Orton sends HBK into the ropes and then nails him with an elbow as he comes off the ropes. Orton delivers a hard stomp to HBK and goes for the cover but doesn’t get the three count. Orton tries to send HBK over his back, but HBK breaks free and ends up behind Orton. Orton sends an elbow back to smack HBK in the face. Orton tries for the RKO but HBK sends him into the ropes. Orton comes off the ropes and HBK sends him over in a back body drop but Orton is trying for a sunset flip. Orton executes the sunset flip, but HBK rolls out of it. HBK gets Orton in an ankle lock and Orton is in the middle of the ring but he’s trying to get to the ropes. Orton manages to flip HBK over and hits a roll up. He gets a two count before HBK kicks out. Again Orton tries for the RKO but HBK drops Orton face first on the mat and goes for the ankle lock one more time. Orton is reaching for the ropes and he’s got them. The referee makes HBK break the hold. Orton rolls out onto the floor holding his ankle and we go to



Back from commercial break, the two men are exchanging chops in the center of the ring. HBK sends Orton over the top rope with a clothesline. HBK rolls out after him and prepares to deliver the super kick but Orton moves out of the way and HBK nails the timekeeper. HBK stops to check on the timekeeper who is out on the floor. Orton is back in the ring and HBK takes too long getting back up on the ring apron and Orton nails him with a kick as he is coming through the ropes. Orton dumps HBK on his head in a DDT while JR tells us that medical help is coming for the timekeeper who is still out on the floor near the announcer’s table. Orton is now looking towards where the timekeeper is down. Orton feels his own ankle and then stomps on HBK’s ankle, then his arm and hand. Orton delivers a knee to HBK’s head and then goes for a cover. He gets a two count. Orton pounds on HBK in the corner and the ref is in the middle trying to break it up. Orton gets HBK in a combination body scissors and chin lock, but he releases the leg lock. HBK is trying to get back to his feet and he does, swinging fists into Orton’s ribs to get him to release his hold. The two men exchange fists in the middle of the ring. HBK tries to send Orton across into the ropes but Orton gets the switch. As HBK comes off the ropes, he hits Orton, sending him crashing to the mat. HBK is back to his feet and he delivers an inverted atomic drop, a forearm shot and then takes Orton down in a backslide but he only gets a two count. HBK slams Orton to the mat and then climbs up to the top turnbuckle. HBK comes down with an elbow to Orton’s chest and HBK tunes up. As HBK stomps on the canvas he suddenly goes over the top rope and takes out Mr. Kennedy who has just arrived at ringside. HBK is on the floor pounding on Kennedy and we have a separate match on the floor. Orton is left in the ring as HBK and Kennedy go over the guardrail and continue their fight in the audience.

Orton takes the mic to inform everyone that he is the winner of the match. I thought the referee was supposed to announce who won. Before Orton can put down the mic, Chris Jericho hits the ring and takes Orton down to the mat. Jericho proceeds to pummel Orton. Orton tries for the RKO but Jericho gets away and Orton bails out of the ring. Did I see a yellow stripe in the center of Orton’s back as he exited the ring?

McMahon is backstage with Stephanie. Stephanie says she is there because she is concerned because McMahon has invited a lot of people to the special next week and most of them don’t like McMahon. She doesn’t want to see McMahon get beat up again and she doesn’t want him to show up on Raw next week. But McMahon says that he wants to be there to announce the Greatest Raw Superstar of all time. And he will be at his own show.

And that’s all folks.

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