There's plenty of lame advice columns out there. Why trust your life to two old-hag sisters named Ann and Abby when they probably haven't had a date themselves since Johnson was in the White House?Spike in his infinite genius (read: borderline insanity) has managed to pair two bright Hollywood superstars to field your questions and dish true advice. Or should I say... Love advice!
"Ask Love"
featuring
Jennifer Love Hewitt and Courtney Love
If you'd need advice or would like to pose a
TV's Jennifer Love Hewitt always has a positive look on life. She's a sharp dresser and cute as a button. Always in touch with the problems of today's youth. Look at her concentrating! She is just "busting" with advice. With clear skin like that, how could you not trust her?
Courtney Love is not shy. In fact, she's always ready to ring in with her opinion -- whether you want it or not! After conquoring Hollywood, the Recording Industry, and Kurt Cobain, it seemed only obvious that Courtney take charge with an advice column that dishes the "ugly" truth.
question to our dazzling columnists, click here!
Dear Jennifer Love,
There's a lot of hype revolving around Y2K. I'm wondering if you could suggest any preparations to ensure a smooth transition from one millennium to the next?
Thanks, Brad
Dear Brad,
That's like, so sweet that you've come to me with your question. Um, a lot of adults don't take me seriously about, like, serious stuff like that, but I am 20! In fact, I'm gonna play Audrey Hepburn in an upcoming movie, so don't tell me about maturity! People are put on this beautiful earth for different reasons. What we all are is human beings and we're all on the planet to try and figure out what the heck is going on here. That's the kind of work I want to do in movies, too -- things that say, "Let's be good to each other. It's a weird world and we're all we have." You know? I hope I answered your question and be sure to watch my new show debuting on Fox October 25th.
hugs & kisses, Jennifer Love Hewitt
What's up Sheryl,
Look, you can't be worried about the f**king guys and their macho empowering bulls**t. Take charge over their pathetic, Oedipus-complex lame-asses, and show them that you had your fun at their expense. C'mon, it was fun to dish that s**t out to the jocks, wasn't it? So f**k all of 'em for judging you, girl! The great Patti Smith stands tall today! Live in the f**king moment Sheryl the reunion f**king queen!
Courtney
Dear Sylvia,
That's a really big question. If there's one thing I've learned about investing, it's that it can, like... really break your heart. I invested lots of time with this total sweetie who was on MTV. But he got like, all corny and religious on me. Now I'm involved with this guy who's on "That 70s Show." My manager arranged it because she thought it would be cute if we appeared on each other's shows during sweeps week. Both of our shows are on Fox (mine debuts Oct. 25th.) I hope my show does really well. If it doesn't, I can tell you I'll be totally crying and eating, like, Taco Bell or something.
xoxo Jennifer Love Hewitt
If you'd need advice or would like to pose a
question to our dazzling columnists, click here!
DISCLAIMER: As likely as it seems that Spike might have arranged for these two super-talents to join forces on his web site, it should be mentioned that in fact, they are not currently involved and will not even return his phone calls. The above column represents only what Spike imagines they would say if he didn't have a restraining order barring him from speaking to either celebrity. Management regrets any misleading advertising or lack of sense of humor on your part.
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