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The telletubbies Conspiracy

Contrary to popular belief the tellitubbies are not a fictional race, No body working at the BBC has A good enough imagination to create such beings. They are aliens of course, who have been trying to make contact with the earth for years. The crop circles, UFO sightings were actually the tellitubibies out to play, you see they like drawing, and a field of corn looks like a great place to create a masterpiece in and the tellietubbies being a proud race like lots of people to see their work. So for very many years they just flew around earth, there playful nature confusing many academics and amateur scientists who were mocked for there theories on other life forms, and the X files was created to make sure no body ever took aliens seriously again. Then the tellitubbies managed to do their naughtiest trick yet; they landed in the backgarden of Number 10 Downing Street where John major was gardening his peas. The game was up, although they had tricked all the journalists and policemen into thinking they were just a few clowns from the Tory shamble circus, John major knew differently, these were not John redwood and John precept, it was hard to tell the difference at first, but then The prime minister realised that most Tory MPs spoke Bullshit, not Tellytubby speak and he couldn’t understand the language. Then he realised that they were aliens and was very worried. He phoned the queen, who waved at them, and then Tony Blair, who smiled at the new guests but nobody was very helpful. So as a last resort Mr major contacted the BBC who came up with a cunning plan.

The public were not ready to meet the new guests quite yet, they may be a little surprised, so they flew a camera crew back to teletubby world (taking some of our life forms as an experiment, to see if the atmosphere could support them hence the Rabbits, trees and flowers) For the next 10 years every day of the week an episode would be beamed down from telletubby land, to introduce humans to the aliens, in an indirect kind of way. The gullible public could get used to the life forms, and grow to like them since the image consultants represented the aliens in a nice, funny way. The tellitubbies do find it degrading to waddle up and down, and belly bounce each other but realise it is necessary if they are ever to live on earth. As payment for the shows, the BBC teaches the Tellitubbies about life on earth, using the TV receivers in the alien’s stomachs to make it interesting for them. The BBC beam up a video clip that is fairly educational but fun too, and show this on the earth shows too so the children on earth can learn the same syllabus as the tellitubbies.

The shows will soon be sold all over the world, brainwashing the children and the future of the planet with subliminal messages from the shower heads, the morals and ideals from tellitubby land. Already the tellitubbies have condoned fascism so what next? Our planet, my friends is in grave danger.

Email: funk_18@hotmail.com