FP - News



Plug pulled on Terri Schiavo--Pope died--Abrams tanks fall to homemade bombs--Bush in Never-neverland calls out army of robots--Government acknowledges no recruits--Arabs whack Saddam judge---Bush proposes branching Arab reprisals against US civilians in Irak terrorism----Congress increases death gratuity, US service members now on par with Arabs-----Italy withdraws from US coalition-----War crimes trial for Lt. Pantanaro, Bush's uncle Iraki billionaire, Bush will abolish Social Security--------------Holy Hillary!

Two events overshadowed the news: the Terry Schavio case and the death of the Roman Church's leader Pope Jan-Paul II. Michael Jackson wearing his long johns (union suit, combinations) to court on charges of child molestation and George Bush Jr. dispatching Lady Bush to entertain war weary troops in Afghanistan, scarcely merited attention.

The decade long battle of the errant husband of Terri Schiavo to pull the plug ended after the Federal courts empowered by an 11th hour session of Congress to stay the pull-the-plug order refused to consider the petition of Terri Schiavo's parents to assume responsibility for the woman said to be beyond a reasonable chance of survival without a feeding tube. The usual endemic liberals, the Hill of the Hill, Holy Hillary, dissipated Ted Kennedy and Charles Schummer, either avoided the session or voiced no opposition, throwing the strictly ethical issue on the Federal Courts which are extremely unpopular in right wing circles.

The media event did see some interesting shades of Christian unity with the Reverend Jesse Jackson joining hands in prayer with a fire breathing white racist.

Michael Levy proposed the following ethical question which has invited much debate. Submit your views today.

Does a person who has suffered brain damage and can no longer feed themselves deserve to live, or should they be starved to death?

ALL VIEWS WELCOME! Submit here.

During the brouhaha over Terry Schiavo, the war in Irak and Afghanistan raged with the steady flow of amputees, said now to exceed 11,200, returning from the front: Purple Heart Boulevard leading to the heavily defended Green Zone. Arabs took their toll of invincible Abrams tanks. According to a report in the semiofficial voice of the establishment, the New York Times, the Abrams tank might have withstood a rocket attack from Soviet armor and artillery, but cannot stand up to homemade Arab bombs.

The Bush stung by revelations that recruiting for the Armed Forces has not lived up to expectations has proposed that a robot army be dispatched to Irak. We certainly hope it works better than the drone planes which destroyed a US Armored column near Baghdad in the opening days of the war.

Americans, observed Professor Teach recognized mallologist and RPPS Lord of Commerce, are fady people, inclined to mouth the correct theme for the time but very disinclined for the types of sacrifice war requires.

Reservists returned from the front in Irak after the December mutinies scattered at the onslaught of recruiting sergeants. "It's like nothing you could ever imagine," said one who beat feet from a memorial service. The sole re-enlistee in the NY's 108th, a sergeant, invited to the inauguration for a clump of tuna on a cracker, before being shown the gate, remarked caustically, "The recruiting sergeants had better get busy."

According to Sir Harry RPPS Commandant, the gap between the situation as seen by blowbagging blowhards screaching for war and vengeance or Iraki democracy and reality reveals to potential enemies like Red China a serious defect in the American character.

Administration spokesmen hope that the poor state of the economy together with the unit loyalty will encourage others to reenlist. Realists led by General Powell and serious State Department analysts urge withdrawal from an unwinnable war and abandonment of the newly created Iraki democracy to its fate.

A worth candidate for membership in the never-never land, the Bush placidly held a reception for the six relatives of Congressmen who served in the Iraki war. It is believed all six were black.

Living down his wife's decision to order the arrest of a Gold Star mother during the campaign, the bush invited the mother of a KIA to his State of the Union Address. The buffarilo produced must have been an extra for Mayberry RFD. Meanwhile, Lady Bush, dispatched to Afghanistan to stir up some patriotic fervor, omitted from her address to the remaining loyal troops her Mis-en-scene with the Gold Star mother last July. Other families of KIAs described the lavish inauguration as gaudy and garish, unsuited to the somber tones of war time.

The semiofficial New York Times reports that the manpower situation is so critical that the Army has reached recalling veterans who were discharged 12-13 years ago.

At home, noted Thomas Dean many of the arm chair patriots are aghast that superior American technology has not humbled the Arab still fighting now two years after President Bush's melodramatic declaration of victory on the deck of the USS Kennedy. The most vocal argue that The Bomb should be dropped to teach the buggers a little lesson. Most do not understand that superior fire power alone does not make a hostile population cooperative.

The mood amongst the Armed Chair patriots remains one of confidence notwithstanding dissonant echoes of failures abroad. So long as neither the armed chair patriots nor their friends the neo-cons are required to serve they may continue to exude abolute faith in their leader. US disinformation services continue to spread pleasing rumors.

While war fever still burns to the extent that some will wear tee shirts festooned with slogans, the problem with recruitment to fight the war has led the Bush to fire the ad agency and hire a new one with more patriotic messages geared at parents to encourage children to join up and fight.

Will parents who refused service in Vietnam encourage young people to fight in Irak?

Against Bushist claims of capturing imaginary kingpins and of executing colorful lightening raids, the Arabs have taken a steady toll of Quislings, adding the Judge appointed to hear Saddam Hussein's war crimes trial, the Governor of Baghdad, the police chiefs of Mosul and Baghdad and now (Quisling) Minister of the Interior to the list of executed traitors. Bush intends to counter Arab attacks on US civilians in Irak with a UN resolution branding that action as terrorism.

According to Sir Harry, RPPS Commandant, only a proper soldier is a lawful combatant. A US civilian in a war zone is a fair target; a US civilian under arms in a war zone is a renegade who may be taken by the enemy and disposed of summarily.

The Bush is trying to legislate the conduct of war so that the Arabs can't legally use the hit and run strategies in resisting invasion immortalized by Mel Gibson in The Patriot. It's as ridiculous as King Canute's order to the tides to recede. But of course King Canute's sychopantic courtiers hip deep in water may have had to swear their feet were dry.

The President did get his way with his appointment of Condellesa Rice as Secretary of the State and Pablo Poncho Villa Gonzales as Attorney General. Poncho drew heavy opposition in the Senate for his endorsement of war crimes committed in Irak. He did pledge to follow the Geneva Conference in the very near future.

Congress did increase the death gratuity for KIAs to $150,000. This will place American soldiers killed in action with Arab counterparts. Arabs typically pay that much to the families of the suicide bombes. Only the Establishment Press raised a voice in opposition to the increase noting that a sister of a KIA had spent the existing death gratuity of $8000 on a dress.

Dr Davies said of this, "I take note of the parity established but I dread to comment on the implications."

The piece de resistance among recent Iraki casualties came when US forces gunned down an Italian Special Agent returning with a freed hostage and attempted to murder the hostage. The Bush issued regrets for the gangland slaying though that did little to assuage the mercurial Italian temper which manifests itself in a funeral oration to 10,000 congregates calling for a vendetta. Not unsurpisingly, the Italian PM was forced to withdraw from the Bushist coalition.

To assuage liberal consciences at home, the Bush administration accused Marine Lt. Pantanaro of war crimes in gunning down Irakis who fled a check point. According to news reports Lt. Pantanaro fired 50 rounds into the bodies of retreating Arabs as the sergeant turned his back on the incident. The incident was not reported on the Lt.'s officer efficiency report filed a month later which described him as "a good warrior."

In Sir Harry's view, the incident may be sensationalized by the establishment press. Indeed, American small arms weaponry is made so poorly that a clip could not hold 50 rounds and an attempt to fire that many rounds so quickly might melt the barrel. The establishment press did note that the Lt., an enlisted man in the 1991 War, had been earning a six figured salary at the time of outbreak of this war.

While the semi-official NY Times ran a front page story in the Sunday edition of April 10th on the miracles of military medicine teaching one armed-WACs the art of single-handed basketball, the Bush scurried off to Texas to Fort Hood to rally the troops with an heroic pose of hand picked six foot four bereted troops behind a banner proclaiming utter single-minded determination in the Bushist cause in Irak. According to the Discovery Channel, Americans like pre-packaged news presented in statuesque images. BBC news heavily censored inside the US presented the photographic iconography as the British reporter's mouth moved without emitting sound. Unfortunately the monument makers sculpting the singular icon couldn't stuff the president into the picture: Having selected fillers of great stature, they found the president too short to stand among them. A soldier present told a NPR reporter, "the Arabs are on a jihad; they {US}'re dreaming if they think they can stop it." And a good time was had by all, even the one-armed girls playing basketball.

Yet, the President has good reason to declare another victory. His uncle became an instant billionaire in Irak running protection racket for other American businesses.

But according to Andy Martin who reminds us he is not Andrew Martin but Anthony Martin, there is little reason for cheer elsewhere in the ranks. Finance agencies have been running repossessions of service member's cars and houses at a land office pace and have stepped up harassment of service member's families to pay up, all in violation of the Soldiers and Sailors Civil Relief Act. The primary beneficiary of this is the Bush family with its cozy relations with financing reported in the New York Times.

In the words of Jack Rang, FP crime reporter, in a money driven economy money not virtue is the standard of all values.

Yet if the adverse direction the war has taken were not apparant, the price of gasoline soared almost 20% since Inauguration Day in January. Nonetheless in face of the sky rocketing increases consumption has increased 2%. US disinformation specialists float the line that gasprices are dropping in real dollars.

I usually ask them: in the past was I spreading unreal dollars or counterfeit on gas? Most of those interesting sorts, like their leader, run off when challenged, said Deacon Jones. War is peace, ignorance is strength, poverty is plenty!

With another $82 billion shot down the dry well in Irak, small wonder the President proposed abolishing Social Security for those now under the age of 55. Alan Greenspan arguing for the change reveals that the money is running short to pay benefits. The public would like to keep Social Security but is averse to any increased taxes to pay for it.

The effectiveness of US disinformation through conventional news outlets as well as through gossip and rumor cannot be understated. Like the Third Reich, US propaganda touted Nostradomus while the Quatrains sang the desired tune; after 9 - 11 when the poetry didn't sound quite as sweet, Nostradamus was dismissed as a fraud.

According to Edward L Sommersett, Lord President of the Society, Nostradamus' beautiful mideaval French poetry would have placed the 9 - 11 disaster in 1999. Nostradamus missed by two years, but since we may be off by as much as five years on the birth of Christ depending on whether we measure from the comet or the Imperial census, Nostradamus may have pinpointed the date.

In the midst of tragedy, there is humor. We will have Andy Martin to kick around some more. Andy Martin is back on the campaign trail, this time in Illinois for governor. We have suggested many other elected positions which he might persue: Governor of Baghdad, Police Chief of Baghdad, Police Chief of Mosul, Judge in Saddam Hussein's case or Iraki Ministry of Justice. The posts have been recently vacated and on one would likely make much of a contest for it.

A Cheery Cheerio,
RPPS Corp
In Fullosiam

If libraries opened as late as bars we'd be drunk on learning!
~ RPPS Corp