I'm reminicing, dreaming old dreams, wishin old wishes...like you would be back again
Hmm severe sadness has taken over. I just can't help it whenever I hear that song. LoL whenever I hear a lot of songs I think about *him* and wonder if he's ok. I haven't heard from him so I wonder how everything went at the doctor's today. Yap Yap. So I dunno. Its almost been a year since I met him. So yea thas awkward. I knew it would be rough tho so I'm not complaining.

I worked a lil on my site today. Sumthin I haven't done in awhile. So thas cool.

The weird thing is that I think heem - (code name for Derick, lol and I'm telling you) misses me too. Like when we were talking yesterday, we were both remenicin about our past together. I mean, the last thing he needs right now is me, but I'd do anything.... he told me about a friend he made and it makes me so sad because I'd kill to be tha girl. I don't know if right now if he's trying to make me jealous, if he knows what he's doing to me, or if he's really that naive. (I'll see you again, pretend your naive, is this what you want, is this what you need?) Good times man.
When I said that to heem about our past, he goes, 'very'. What does that mean?!?! Is that good?! Bad?! Does he miss me. Would he keep talking to me and hanging on to the past if he didn't? I dunno I haven't really thought about this whole situation like this in a loooong time and I actually thought I was doing pretty good. I love Derick, i really think I do. and its seriously killing me. And I think a moth just bit me in the neck. Ewwie.
LoL ok but serious: whenever I think about dating someone else, or getting serious with another guy, I keep going, "aww hey, remember when me n heem used to..." and it goes on like tha forever. I so wish for him to hold me in his arms like he once did....but it won't happen again. I don't see it happening anytime soon at least...

So thas pretty much all thas been goin on. *shrugs* Dammit, SB is almost ova :(( But, maybe once I get back to school and my life gets back on track everything will be betta. I dunno

"Don't be stupid...you know I love you!"
Shania Twain - Don't be stupid