Pirates work 8 days a year
Stealing gold and
Eating mold
We are to fulfill our destiny
Stealing cars
Candy bars

[CHORUS]
Pirates
Got to stand by the
Pirates
Parrots on their shoulders
Pirates
Buttering down the hatches
Pirates
Arr!

The parrots on our shoulders
Are props for the national guard
Eating peaches
Laying on beaches
We own most of England
Bad hygiene
Though it might seem

[CHORUS]

As you can probably tell
This is a tale of ultimate betrayal
Shopping at stores
Cleaning my pores
My teeth are falsely accused of gold
Caddyshack Two 
And Old School 

Pirates
Butter them hatches
Pirates
Swabbing the poop deck

WORDS, MUSIC, AND TITLE: EARTHWORM IN COWBOY HAT