2/22/03 9:01 p.m.
This just in: All exportations of Jerry Lewis films to France have been halted. Crazed people are taking the streets in Paris. Government officials are expected to begin deliberations with the U.N. Before the situation becomes out of control.
2/24/03 6:23 a.m.
President addresses nation.
“We ain’t callin’ ‘em French Fries anymore.”
2/25/03 5:36 p.m.
American tourists desert France. Seems like they got their wish.....
French President replies: “Stoopit Ameericans!”
2/26/03 4:00 p.m.
French bread, cheeses, cars, and all other domestic products outlawed in U.S.
2/28/03 6:00 a.m.
French give up, come begging on their knees to U.N. Officials. Apparently the Jerry Lewis thing was just too much to handle.
The French hate Americans. Always have, probably always will. Sure they gave us the Statue of Liberty, but what else are they supposed to do when we come in and save their sorry bootays? Also, since when are they a peace loving nation? Last time I checked it was the French “Revolution” not the French “non-voilent protest.” So fellas, please move to the side and let us get rid of Saddam once and for all. Now excuse me while I go throw out last night’s “chicken cordon bleu.”